


The Performance of the Ages

by SerialParoxysm



Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Agender Character, Closeted Character, Enemies to Lovers, Exploring fonons and Auldrant physics, Follows Canon but like.. with the OC involved, Found Family, Gender Non-Conforming Jade Curtiss, Gender Questioning Character, Genderfluid Character, Humor, Jade Curtiss/OC - Freeform, Jesters, Misgendering, Non-binary character, Original Character(s), Other, Self-Indulgent, Slow Burn, Summoning, Trans Character, and i wanted to write a trickster jester character so, super self-indulgent but hey i wanted to think about how summoning would work in abyss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:29:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 41,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24323575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SerialParoxysm/pseuds/SerialParoxysm
Summary: So used to wearing masks during every encounter, a Jester is struck by a fellow who seems to recognize them wherever they are. They quite enjoy the thrill of it all, but when it comes time to drop the charade they find it is harder to act with ones real face. How do you trust someone whose entire life is centered around secrets?This is a story that follows the main plot of Tales of the Abyss. It might continue past it if I'm feeling creative enough. It's basically adding this character into the main party. They are an entertainer and the first summoner in Auldrant -- having formed a primitive pact with Shadow as a teenager. Sounds fake, right? Yeah, that's what everyone thinks, too.If anyone cares about my theories about Tales games and summoning and mana and fonons and LORE let me know. Please. I want to ramble. I have a powerpoint. I've connected the dots.
Relationships: Jade Curtiss/Original Character(s)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 7





	1. A Lovely Distraction

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work and I'm terrified of posting things online and here I am posting a glorified self-insert? Playing with fire is what this is called. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and I hope you enjoy it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An opening performance to set a city being invaded by Oracle Knights at ease. What else is an entertainer for, after all?

St. Binah was overdue for a performance.

The city was tense, and they couldn’t be blamed for it. The possibility of war was looming stronger than ever, and with Akzeriuth drowning in miasma, St. Binah was sure to be the first city to feel a military breach. Not only that, but there had been no word from Grand Chokmah about any of it, and unsure people were the most unhappy of people.  
Especially when suddenly there’s a uniformed general traipsing around town with Very Important People that they were obviously trying to keep low-key. And especially when shortly after they show up, so do the Six God Generals and a whole legion of Oracle Knights. Now, St. Binah was as loyal to the Score as anyone else, so no one could fathom just what on earth they were here for.

That is where the chance arose. The indecisive jester in their midst saw an opportunity to put minds other than their own at rest, and give a lovely little distraction to all the murmurings of fear.

The Jester appeared in the plaza, taking the center stage for themself. Who could resist coming to look when suddenly there was a human figure flipping right beside the pristine flowerbed and setting up a podium? A person dressed like that, whatever that was, and their face coated in such unnatural colors. Especially when such strange squeaky hums came from that person, sounding almost like a bird trying to speak human language.

The Jester started with simple juggling, as a warm up for themself and also the few people who were warily approaching. It was not impressive by any means, but when some people stopped to watch, they made a lovely show of trying to wave while juggling.

“ _Twk-tweeee!_ ” A shrill squeal came from their panicked face as the balls they had masterful control over began to fall out of line!

The Jester squeaked rhythmically, frowning and scolding each of the balls as they came back to their hands, and set them in order again -- all before trying once again to wave at some newcomers. The antics seemed enough to ease up at least the first group. Skeptical eyebrows and pitying smirks were far better than outright unease.  
  
The Jester continued to juggle the balls, first with elaborate shapes and patterns, and then suddenly seeming to add in additional balls out of nowhere. One appeared on their elbow, one from their feet somehow, and somehow they had managed to bump them both into a steady flow. It was enough to earn them some applause, and the crowd seemed to warm up to the bird-like squeaks that came from them as they counted off their tricks.

Only when they had managed to somehow juggle and then hold six balls in total did they stop, raising their hands in the air with a proud “ _Ta-taaaaah!_ ”

The crowd seemed to find that endearing, as a ripple of chuckles rolled through, and a scattering of applause. Then, the Jester put down the materials, and waved out to the crowd with an enthusiastic greeting tweet. Being unable to simply walk to their bag of tricks, one quick cartwheel led them to gather up a cloth bag.

“ _Zwooo…_ ” They held it open and gave an enticing whistle, making a show of looking inside. They looked at the crowd for a moment, clearly pondering whether it was the right trick to show this crowd. A few pointed glances and raised eyebrows later, their hand emerged from the bag with.. A single clear crystal ball.

The Jester held it up as triumphantly as they had held all six before, and looked around expectantly for applause which never came. Bewildered, slightly amused stares maybe, but certainly no applause. The Jester pouted and put the bag down, holding up the ball and one finger on the other hand.

Three scandalized tweets seeming to say _“wait, wait, wait,”_ whistled from them as they let the clear ball seem to roll to the tips of their fingers on its own. From there, it toppled down, and seemed to take a life of its own, swirling like a snake over their hands, and then up and down their arms. It poised on one elbow, and then with a small jump landed on the other, only to roll across the Jester’s chest to return down the first arm. Their hands swirled around the glass which almost seemed to stand still in the air as the juggler caressed it like water.

This was clearly enough to earn the crowd’s approval, as they achieved applause after tricks even without their proud little beeps to signal it. Soon after, another clear crystal was added, dancing circles around the first, with the Jester seeming to be a third piece in the performance. The Jester danced under, around, and through the balls as smooth as a stream, until eventually they let them both roll down their arms and back into the bag of tricks on the ground, seamlessly disappearing.

The crowd applauded again, fueling the radiantly proud look the Jester seemed to get only when they cheered. The Jester practically hopped in place and squeaked, waving at them happily, and only getting more cheerful as a few children waved back. Suddenly, the Jester stopped!

“ _Squee_!” They had just remembered, it seemed, given from the sharp and startled chirp that came from them, that they needed a volunteer! They raised their hand in the air and looked out expectantly at the crowd, pointing people out who looked like they might have a bit of fun.

Of course, seeing one of their own wouldn’t do much to ease the tension, so the Jester overlooked each willing participant before halting and grinning devilishly at an Oracle Knight who had been stalling near the stand for quite a while. Seeing the Knight stiffen, the Jester knew they had chosen right, and gave a slow, dramatic squeal as they lowered a finger down to point at the Knight. “ _Zhooo.._ ”

The Knight stammered, and said something to the nearby citizens about being on duty, but before his protests could be heard properly, the Jester began chanting an encouraging squeak, which the crowd quickly picked up on as they ushered the Knight to the stage.

Having been thoroughly taken out of his element, the Oracle Knight now stood on stage, shuffling in a very un-knightly manner. That didn’t stop the Jester from looking them over and giving an overwhelmed whistle, fanning themself and draping on the Knight.

“ _Woo-woooo~!_ ” What a handsome, brave knight he was! The crowd chuckled at that, and the Jester jumped up with a squeak to reach for their bag. From it, they pulled out a torch, showing it off to the audience, and then giving an approving, slow whistle as they set it on fire with the slightest bit of fonic energy. The crowd became much more attentive at the prospect of danger, and the Knight became much more nervous.

Especially as the Jester turned to him as if to toss him the baton, but they quickly squeaked in jest and walked over to him. A determined squeak, and they held out the torch to him to hold. When he took hold of it, the Jester gestured to it, and then themself and took a step back, with an inquiring look. They repeated the motions, with another step back, until the Knight seemed to sigh in understanding to toss the baton to the Jester when called.

The Jester grinned at him and took to the other side of the stage, far from him, carefully looking over the distance and making musing squeaks as they made a show of measuring out the distance. They deemed it to be too far, and scooted closer, doing the same and then seeming thoroughly dissatisfied. They walked up to the Knight and took three Big Steps away from him before turning around, looking like they were about to call _“Ready!”_ before pouting once again. They frowned and looked at the torch, measuring the distance again, as the crowd began to get antsy with uneasy chuckles. The Jester took one step closer to the Knight, measured again and shuffled nervously, squeaking sadly at the crowd and gesturing to the fire that he was holding. It was fire!

The crowd got the picture and cheered the Jester on slightly, emboldening them… to take another step forward, just in front of the Knight holding the flaming torch and wondering why he was there. The crowd paused, as the gentle toss required to pass the baton over was hardly more than a throw, and still the Jester looked concerned. Suddenly, they brightened, and from their waistbelt pulled out yet another baton! This one was unlit, and with a proud look they plucked the flaming one from the knight and handed him the unlit one. The Jester jumped back and gave a loud, proud squeak, holding out their hands for the Knight to toss.

Bewildered, the Knight.. Did. And the Jester caught the stick with one hand, before turning and squealing a “ _tah-daaaah!_ ” to the crowd.

At the lack of impressed applause (though there was plenty of amused chuckles), the Jester pouted and whined.

“ _Tweeee.._ ” They tweeted out their disappointment as they once again held the flaming baton out to the Knight, who took it without complaint. As they pulled away, however, the Jester brushed the other baton against the flaming one, and it burst into life just as suddenly, earning the crowd a shocked squeak of horror as they now had two flaming sticks. The crowd, apparently, thought that mortal danger was funny, because they laughed at the Jester!

The Jester stomped sullenly away, a good couple meters of distance from the Knight. The crowd grew silent as the Jester seemed to warily eye the flaming baton the Knight had, and then their own. They summoned up their courage, and stood at the ready with a determined squeak, and then held out their arms with a stammered call. “ _T-T-Twooh-twee!_ ”

The Knight did as he was told, and tossed the flaming baton to the Jester, who, of course, swept it up into a smooth juggle of two flaming batons. The squeaks the Jester made were anything but smooth, seeming to impress the nature of the fact that they had flaming sticks spinning around in their hands. But as the crowd -- ahem -- warmed up to the situation, so did the Jester, and soon they paused, finally catching the two sticks by their handles with a sigh of relief. Then, they pulled one more baton from their waistband and held it up to the crowd tantalizingly.

“ _Zh-hmmm..?”_ "they seemed to question the audience, waving the third baton around like it was a treat. The crowd applauded their approval, and the Jester grinned, lighting the third on fire with the others, making a gesture to throw it at the Knight - just to watch him jump - and then tweeting out a chuckle as they started to seamlessly juggle the three torches. After a few tricks like this, they stopped, put out the flames, and bowed deeply. They flounced over to the Knight, proudly announcing his help, and making big muscle motions and fanning themself once again as they gestured for the man to bow also. He did, if only to quickly shuffle off the stage, but the Jester waved and sighed after him in a way that left the crowd giggling.

The Jester waved to the crowd, and bowed once again, the performance having taken the edge out of the air. They whistled and gathered up their materials with a salute, and an extra salute to the Oracle Knights who were now teasing their friend. The crowd began to disperse, sensing that the Jester was done. Children approached the Jester, begging for tricks and entertainment.

This was one of the best parts, the Jester thought. The little ones approached and begged to look inside the bag of tricks, and the Jester squeaked secret susserations as if revealing to them little forbidden hints into merrymaking. They handed the children beanbags to practice juggling with, and would play catch with periodic juggle breaks for hours. It wasn’t until the sun was setting and the children were all dragged away that the Jester was left free.

And in the freedom, there was peace. The sleepy city was all out of tension, all out of fear for the evening. The Jester took a breath, and soaked in the peaceful silence for a moment with a small smile. They looked up to the night sky, and counted the fonstones that were visible - not quite willing to let go of their grip on the clouds and return to reality.

A voice did that for them, however.

“Wouldn’t it be nice if everything were as simple as placing a fool in front of a crowd,” the voice spoke, and the Jester -- the Fool -- realized it was to them. They pulled their gaze from the sky to be met with none other than the Very Important General from before. A glance at his uniform, and that was modified to Very Important Colonel. Still, it mattered little to a Fool. They tipped their head and raised an eyebrow to him, offering him to continue.

“I doubt many other cities could say that a sudden inquisition from Daath went half as smoothly. Unless they’ve employed the ‘strange and unusual’ as calming tactics?” the Colonel looked amused at the prospect, and the amusement from his shielded eyes bled out into a grin plastered across the Fool’s face.

With a _“wee-woo..”_ whistle, the Fool shrugged and shook their head forlornly, holding out their hands.

“It seemed the only logical reason you did not pass around a hat at the end of the performance,” the Colonel shrugged also.  
But the Fool straightened with a look that said ice had just been poured down their back, and gave an alarmed squeak. They quickly looked into their bag -- empty of coin -- and around at the plaza -- empty of patron -- and gave an even more dismayed whistle. No payment for services rendered, even for the sake of the Score! The Fool pressed their hands to their cheeks in exaggerated exasperation.

The only thing that could break the facade was the sharp, short huff of laughter from the Colonel. They could tell it wasn’t a full laugh, but the Fool was pleased to have gotten some amusement from him. “A few of the Knights you tormented are staying the night at the inn,” the Colonel informed them. “Perhaps if you pay them a visit, you could gather some scraps.”

The Fool stuck their lips out in a pout and put their hands on their hips, but before they could determine the pitch for their retorting whistle, their eyes slid to a shock of green hair from the Very Important Colonel’s hidden Very Important Person. They couldn’t help but look a second longer. Not everyone had had the pleasure of meeting the Fon Master, but the Fool knew in an instant who they were looking at. Before they could process what it meant, the blue uniform of the Colonel invaded their view, and they looked up. His carefully amused expression had quickly turned to a neutral calm, overlaying the scheming eyes that watched the Fool’s. They were an unusual, unnatural shade of red. Though curious, The Fool took the message, and backed off, with a coy smirk and hands raised.

They put a finger to their lips, and shushed themself, the whistle blowing with the air into a gentle hum. They winked at the Colonel, who did not seem ready to be put at ease, and then waved. They stepped away from him and his Very Important Fon Master, in search of a room to stay in. The Colonel let the Fool leave, but the Fool could feel eyes on them throughout the whole trek to the inn. Probably because of the makeup.

* * *

The Inn was lively, and seemed to be the place where the revelry the Fool had started was being continued. As they were told, a party of five or so Oracle Knights out of their armor sat at a table together near the center. The Fool wondered which of them had been on stage, but found their thoughts being much more enticingly dragged to bed. With their bag of tricks over their shoulder, they turned to the innkeeper's desk.

The innkeep was already watching them -- again, probably the makeup -- and looked perplexed. “You’re the cause of all that out there, then?” she asked, not sounding particularly upset. The Fool gave her a wry smile and shrugged, though they nodded. The innkeep nodded too, and stood up straight. “Well, I got plenty of customers comin’ in tonight because of you. If you need a place to stay, I’ll offer half price.”

The Fool was genuinely grateful, and grinned at the woman, nodding. They reached into their bag of tricks (okay, it wasn’t _completely_ empty of coin, but it had been a funny gag) and paid the woman outright, before there would be more notice to their presence. The woman took it and counted it over, humming appreciatively. “Good. I’ll show you your room.”

The Fool nodded, and followed, soon left in front of a cozy little closet of a room. Frankly, they were amazed that the innkeep would offer them a full room for that price. They had expected a bed in a room of others, and very little privacy besides. Perhaps they would be able to wash their face more thoroughly than they had thought. “Dinner’s on for another hour,” the innkeep said. “Best get some before those knights eat it all.”

The Fool smiled and nodded, bowing elegantly to the woman as she scoffed in amusement and left. The Fool could close the door and be utterly, completely alone, if only for a moment. They took a breath and sighed, their bones aching to fall into the small bed in the corner, but it would be rude to get face paint on the pillowcases.

A short shower was in order. The performance of the day became muddled in the flowing water, slowly peeling away from the Fool’s face, and letting their poor skin breathe. By Yulia, it got sweaty performing out there that long. The Fool felt ten times lighter for being clean, which then became a weight in their chest as they faced themself in the mirror.

The Fool -- Feora was their name. They had one, but sharing never mattered to them. It was far easier to go nameless. Stripped of their mask, they were reminded of their own reasons for the performance. St. Binah wasn’t the only one with worries, and Feora had been just as happy to forget alongside the city in the midst of the performance. As they dried and dressed again, their mind wandered to the bag they had placed on the desk. Inside it lay a small glass-like stone whose importance seemed to fill the whole room. It was merely more than a shard, in reality.

But still, the fonstone held the truth. The Score was all-encompassing, and even should Feora prefer to go nameless and faceless amongst the people, the Score would not have it be that way. Was it worth it? Could they escape the fate of the Score, or was it for the best to do as they were told? They couldn’t deny that they had considered it even before finding the stone, but the thought of letting all of the masks fall, and all of the past slip away left them feeling sick to their stomach.

Now was the time to do something. Even if they could perform and distract the people, that wouldn’t stop the coming war. They couldn’t do anything as they were now, and while they couldn’t fault anyone else for feeling helpless.. Feora felt guilt claw at their chest, knowing that they _weren’t_ helpless. It was their own fear and selfishness that kept them from their duty. A duty that they were sure at least half of their patrons would take up despite the terror.

Feora huffed to themself and went back out to the bedroom, giving into the desire to simply melt into the bed for a moment. The only thing that stopped them from falling asleep then and there was their stomach reminding them that they had just given a very active performance in the sunlight and needed food, dammit. They sighed at the third rumble of their stomach and sat up. They donned a cap to cover their hair as it had been during the performance, though more of a normal sort, and crept back out to the main floor.

The warmth of firelight, alcohol, and chattering customers hit Feora’s exhausted senses like a wave crashing against the shore. After a whole day of just that, hearing it once again left their mind buzzing away all thoughts of the shard in their bag, or the worries of tomorrow. All they knew now was that the room was calm, and that whatever the cook had going in that pot over there smelled _divine._

Luckily for Feora, it tasted just as divine, and they felt warmth return to each tip of their finger with every bite. Doubly lucky, it seemed that none of the knights from before were able to recognize them without their flamboyant outfit -- which meant that Feora could join in the festivities without having to lead them. They grabbed a second bowl of the lovely stew, and a mug of ale before turning to join the communal table and share stories with other travellers. Through the chortling and cheering of newfound friends, Feora felt the sting of a gaze out of the corner of their eye. They turned to meet eyes with the Very Important Colonel before his gaze slid away unassumingly. It lasted for only but a moment. Nonetheless, Feora the Fool felt the very cold feeling of being unmasked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a big long practice on getting the Jester character down, and on writing action and stuff while still being interesting. Dunno if it worked, but I hope the writing was pretty?


	2. I Just Learned How to Spell Camaraderie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meet our dear performer's chosen family; one that they are both proud of and infuriated by. Also, meet a butt-face of a Grand Maestro, but luckily we don't have to talk to him personally.
> 
> Crude humor ahead, because we all have bodies and sometimes they're dumb.

It was so very like them to do this. To get so close and then rebound so far away. They had been so close… so close. Their courage failed them the second another opportunity came around, and this time, it came in the form of travelling to the _other side_ of the _fucking world._

Feora spat mentally at themself, and then shook their head out of its musing. They sat in a familiar, dinghy little carriage. The thing propelled itself like a mad beast, and it had always made Feora feel sick. They much preferred to travel by foot, even if it was slower. A particularly rough bump caused their behind to land heavily on the bench and they winced at the same time one of their companions cackled with cacophonous glee.

“Dammit, York, we ain’t at sea no more!” the stout man next to Feora snarled. “Quit drivin’ like the damn hills are gonna part for ya!” Feora quite agreed. 

“Why not? We have places to be, my good man!” York, the taller man in the driver's seat spoke good-naturedly. 

“Because I’m gonna have Urushi use you as target practice if you don’t!” screeched the woman next to him, followed by the sound of a solid smack to the back of the head.

“Ow, hey!” York cried out. “Uncalled for!”

“My foot in your ass is next,” the woman warned him. “Slow down.”

He sighed, and did as he was told. Feora sighed alongside him, but in relief instead, and Urushi next to her did the same. “It’s almost like you want to get rid of me,” Feora managed to emit with a quick glance to the front mirror to make eye contact with York. “There are easier ways to kill me.”

“Ah, but where’s the fun without making you squirm a little?” York replied jovially.

Feora huffed in amusement, but Urushi was the one to speak next. “We’ll see who’s squirmin’ when you don’t get dinner fer that.”

York gasped and the woman, Noir, cackled just as gleefully as York had before. “Serves you right. How do you expect us to be able to catch up if I have to help you dodge trees every five seconds?”

“I can see the trees on my own, thank you very much!”

“That don’t stop you from drivin’ right at ‘em,” Urushi muttered.

“And I have planning to do,” Noir added, gesturing to the papers that she had laying all over the space around her seat. “So quit making me babysit you, or none of us are gonna get paid!”

“Fine, _fine_ ,” York relented, raising a hand in defeat. 

“What kind of job did you guys end up with?” Feora questioned, the car having slowed enough for them to look over the seat at Noir’s work.

Noir scoffed and pulled the papers from view. “ _Secret_ work,” she said.

Feora tried not to pause. They really did. They tried to shove down the disappointment and guilt the second it rose. “Alright, alright, I get it, keep your secrets,” they said in a lofty tone, smirking just a bit.

But wasn’t it just like them to cut the crap. Noir pointed a pen in their direction and scowled. “Don’t you get all sad about it either. You’re the one who said you didn’t want part of any of this. You don’t get to feel left out.”

“I know,” Feora contested quickly. “I mean it, it’s fine.”

“It ain’t fine when you gotta keep secrets from family, ‘n you know it,” Urushi muttered, earning a slight glare from Noir.

“That’s my entire _role_ in the family,” Feora retorted, with an offended gasp. “ _I’m_ the one with the mysterious backstory!”

“Mysterious my ass,” Urushi said. “You got a talent that scares ‘em? You get kicked out. We found ya. Plain and simple.”

“Whatever you say, Urushi,” Feora lamented, poking him petulantly. “But you’re always gonna be wrong.”

“I ain’t,” he muttered under his breath, swatting away Feora’s hand. They laughed at that.

“Hey, just be glad that our secrets are giving you a ride!” York chipped in. “You were just about outta luck. With all that business with the Rotelro Bridge, we almost weren’t gonna come back.

“All that business, you say, as if you didn’t cause the problem in the first place,” Feora retorted.

“We needed the rest of the shipment,” Noir said firmly, scribbling on her notes. “But got a stowaway instead. What do you need to do in Kimlasca anyway?”

Feora shuffled a little, their stomach not really knowing what to say. “...Secret stuff,” they said lamely.

Urushi huffed and Noir rolled her eyes. “Right. So let’s just leave it at that. You got about two hours before we hit Baticul, so you better start getting dolled up if you’ve got business.”

Feora swallowed heavily and nodded, trying to grin for her. “Right. You’ll check my makeup for me still, won’t you?”

Noir gave a huff this time, but with a hint of fondness. “As long as it isn’t secret makeup, I don’t see why not.”

“I’m afraid it’s the most mysterious of them all,” Feora proclaimed, with a long sigh. “Two hours to become a woman.”

“Monstrous,” Urushi retorted dryly.

“It truly is,” Feora agreed as if he were serious. “Then again, you’d never know, since you’ll never let me get you in heels.”

“If you turn this into a short joke, I’m gonna open that door and kick you out myself,” Urushi narrowed his eyes, and Feora chortled.

“Never! I was only sharing with you the _trials_ of being a woman. How about you try running in a gown instead?”

“Not to mention running with _these_ in the way,” Noir agreed, puffing up her chest for a second. “You boys don’t know how lucky you have it.” Feora nodded wisely in agreement.

York straightened up indignantly. “Well, at least _you_ don’t have a one-hit kill between your thighs!”

“Is that what you tell all the girls?” Feora asked innocently. “What a name for it.”

Urushi snorted in amusement as York actually began to turn red. “I do _not!_ ”

“Uh-huh,” Feora nodded, pulling the makeup from their bag of tricks. “I believe you, York. Truly.”

He sped the car up right as they raised the brush, a heavy glob of foundation finding its place right where it didn’t belong on Feora’s face. Feora screeched and lunged at York. “Ah! You little…!”

York only laughed, even with the offending glob thrown back in his face. That caused the car to swerve, and Noir screeched next, grabbing the wheel from her side to get them back on track. “Hey! Watch it!”

But it didn’t help. York and Feora were both lost to incessant giggling, and it took another ten minutes for Feora to begin on their makeup.

The silence that fell afterwards was peaceful, and Feora revelled in it. As the eyeshadow began to paint itself above their eyes, they would glance at their friends, their family, and hold back the sharp sting of pain that came with knowing what they were. They were here to do their job, same as their family, and they knew that she could always rely on their family, secrets and all. 

As they slowly transformed, Urushi commented on her uneven eyeliner a bit later and she gave him the finger before handing him the pencil.

  
  


* * *

Feora said her goodbyes at the gates of Baticul, a safe distance from questioning guards. Her task led her deep into the city, upwards, but first she would stop at the inn and leave her belongings in their care. It certainly was never the safest thing to do, but the inns within the city most often had locked boxes for travelers to use. Much better than having to hide her under piles of dead leaves outside the city, for sure.

Feora got her bed, and her chest, and then slipped away from the building. She looked up at the towering city, and its capitol building at the top. Everything these people knew came from the palace. Everything that determined their fates from one family. Feora intended to get a look at them.

She knew it was stalling. Even if she did manage to get some information of note, who would say anyone would believe her if she were to spread it? There were far more daunting tasks ahead to fix just that, but Feora couldn’t face them. Instead, she would rather infiltrate the palace.

Night would be the best time, whether or not the guards were more attentive or not. Feora needed the shadows and darkness, and could handle a few extra jumpy guards if needed. She mingled until then, gathering what information from the townsfolk she could.

When the veil of night had fallen, Feora climbed. The steps were all illuminated, and guards placed at the top of each one so that intruders could be spotted immediately. Baticul was, after all, a fortress. It was meant for keeping people out -- though usually people who came in large armies rather than a force of one lone jester. While the guards looked ahead at the steps, Feora planned to scale the buildings to the side. Once on the roof, there would still be little to hide her form from the light, but isn’t that just the thing for a diversion?

In the dark corner between one building and the base of the stairs, Feora set one of her tiny tricks to flame and rolled it into the darkness. It’s flame was barely visible from the ground where she was, by the top of the stairs, it would be virtually nothing. She hurried to the buildings on the other side and scurried up to the top, squeezing herself carefully between buildings and walls. She was able to get a good view of the two guards at the top, and was able to wait for her master plan to take place.

It wasn’t long. Several seconds later and the guard on the other side sniffed loudly and grimaced. “By Lorelai, you couldn’t warn a guy first, Henry?” 

“Huh?” the other guard glanced at him, not expecting the break in silence.

“Don’t even try. I know what you ate in the mess hall today,” the first guard insisted, covering his nose.

“What about what I ate?” the second guard began to protest with a higher tone before the smell wafted over to him too. “Guh.. that wasn’t me!”

“That’s bull and you know it,” the guard spoke again, still trying to cover his nose through his helmet. “Ugh..” It didn’t work, and he took the moment to fan the air in front of the helmet opening while whining and while the second guard watched, insisting that it was _definitely_ not him. That was the opening Feora needed to propel herself over the nearby wall into the courtyard without being seen. She knew there were no lights on the other side, but wouldn’t it just be her luck if someone was watching anyway. There was no way to know, though, so she gave it to Lady Luck. As she rolled over the crest of the wall, and slid down on the other side, there seemed to be no sound other than the bickering two guards.

What a relief. The courtyard was only lit in spots, the small torches and fonstones not reaching every corner. A few guards stood outside each residence, and a few more marched between them, periodically traversing the gardens. The gardens it would be, then, Feora decided. 

She crept along the edge of the walls, and hid beneath bushes and hedges. The guards wandered with slow gaits, so it took very little effort for Feora to sidle up next to the far side of the palace. From there, she peeked through windows, quickly judging which were too barren to be anything but servants halls. With the flat of a knife, she pried a window open a crack, carefully watching for any movements on the other side. No lights came, even as she pulled the window open further and slunk through.

The hallway was stone, with a few long end tables and alcoves along the walls, holding last minute cleaning supplies and pots of dirt that didn’t have a plant to nourish yet. Feora swept along the shadows, staying well out of sight and peeking through all the mundane doors she could find until she found the closet she was looking for. Spare uniforms.

Creeping through the doorway, she left the lights off as she hunted down a maid’s outfit and quickly changed. She placed her smaller bags that held to her simple clothes around her body, accentuating her curves a bit more. Enough to hide them, but not to be too unnatural. Once suitably dressed for the occasion, she peeked outside the room to see no one in the hallway. Perfect.

She strode out the door, picked up an empty platter on one of the side tables, and continued about her merry way.

* * *

Feora had very few prying questions about where she had come from. The servants were close to each other, but were far too busy to keep track of every new maid. And Feora certainly looked like she knew what she was doing, so they had no reason to bat an eyelash. After a bit of quick wandering to get the layout of the castle, she swept into the kitchen, dropping off the empty tray and finding another one labelled for the Princess. She figured that as good a place to start as any.

Feora brought the tray to the correct room, and knocked quietly to announce her presence. She was welcomed in by a tired, melodic voice who watched her with a greeting smile before turning back to her reading. “Thank you,” Princess Natalia said. “I am sorry to burden you with these tasks so late in the night.”

Feora curtsied, letting her voice rise and fall softly. “Anything to assist you, your highness. I’m sure it’s been a long day for you.”

“Yes, but no less for you,” the princess said. “Nonetheless, thank you. I have much to go over regarding the Grand Maestro’s reports, and this tea should keep my spirits up.”

Ah, so Grand Maestro Mohs was visiting Kimlasca? Feora couldn’t help but wonder whatever for. “I hope it does, your highness,” she said, a bit surprised at the camaraderie with which the princess spoke to her. “Might I get anything else for you?”

“No, that is all. You may go.”

Feora curtsied again and left, making a mind to check the guest rooms for any knowledge she could gather about the Grand Maestro’s visit. She checked the kitchen for any supplies to be sent there, but it seemed there was no need. Luckily, Feora wasn’t above eavesdropping.

Busying herself with a polishing rag and making enough movement to look busy, she headed in the right direction until she could see no one nearby. How fortunate, again! With a little more thanks towards Lady Luck, Feora slipped into the shadows again and kept out of sight to slink closer to the room.

“--s the will of the Score,” a confident voice was speaking. “If the Score says this is what comes to pass, then it must.”

“Yes, your grace,” a meeker voice said slowly. “What of the Fon Master? Does he not speak for Daath as well?”

“The Fon Master is not well,” the voice Feora assumed to be Mohs spoke. “He is ever in Daath, attending to matters there while he recovers.”

Interesting, Feora thought, because not a few days ago he had been in St. Binah. He had been trying to look ever so secret as well. 

“I understand,” the meek voice said. “We shall deploy our troops as you suggest, and continue our search within the ranks.”

“Yes. I must prepare tomorrow’s report for His Majesty. Leave me,” Mohs said. The sound of shuffling, and a door closing left the room to silence. Feora desperately wanted to know what could be in these reports, though… It seemed that Mohs had the King’s ear, and the Princess’ as well. Whatever it was must be terribly important. There was clearly no point in being here if she would just turn away once finding the important information she wanted!

It was time for the waiting game, then, which was by far the most boring part of any infiltration. She hoped that the Grand Maestro was as worn out as Princess Natalia had looked.

It seemed he wasn’t, which sucked because Feora was getting uncomfortable in her hidden spot. She didn’t like it at all, but she supposed that it couldn’t be any worse than past times. At least here it was warm and dry. She waited for what seemed to be at least an hour or two before the lights in the room finally shut off. With a sigh of relief, she held out for the next twenty minutes to let the man fall asleep before she stole inside. 

Silently as possible, she snuck to the desk and swiped a sheet of paper from the top. By the window illuminated by moonlight, she read it as quickly as she could. Then, there was a pause in her intensity, and she frowned. She read it again, curiosity poking at her chest in the most exhilarating of ways.

Someone was _lying_ to the _King!_ Oh, that was too rich for her. The document clearly said that _St. Binah_ was amassing an invading army! Well, unless they counted the Fon Master and a random Colonel to be an army, Feora couldn’t recall seeing any military sigils other than the normal. Certainly no _dreadnaughts_ and _legions_ that were reported here. This was huge, Feora realized, even beyond the joy that the discovery brought her. She felt a stab of horror break through it -- this was _big._

Someone very important was lying to other very important people. Who it was, Feora wasn’t sure, but if the Oracle Knights in St. Binah had been Mohs scouts… Well, then that meant that the _God Generals_ had been in charge of them. So, it could be the God Generals lying to the Grand Maestro, which would certainly put a twist into the power systems of Daath. Were they in on it together, or was one of the six breaking away? Or perhaps the Grand Maestro himself.. For whatever reason Feora couldn’t fathom, was lying to the King of his own will.

Either way, this false report was one that damned the hopes of citizens across the world. This was going to start the war, and St. Binah would be the first casualty. Rage flared in her chest as she slid the paper back to the desk. The people of St. Binah were innocent. The soldiers there, and the soldiers who would be sent to slaughter them -- for the time being, they were innocent. Feora couldn’t let this happen. At this point, it was too important for her dumb fears to get in the way.

Feora glanced around the dark room, her thoughts racing while the room held as still as a picture. It seemed as if it would swallow her up whole. The silence whispered to her what she already knew she must do, but… 

She turned back to the desk, pulling a sheet of paper closer and staring at the blank space, only lit by the moonlight. What was the truth, though? What could she report without knowing what was really going on? She couldn’t. Her heart felt like a weight in her chest as she wrote a single sentence, and then folded the paper neatly into an envelope. She took the Grand Maestro’s still-drying wax and sealed the envelope shut. 

Now, Feora had no choice. It was done, and she couldn’t go back. She cracked open the window she was near and let a rope hang from a nearby crook. It was time to leave. She had thought to stay a few days, but no more. She would stay the night, cramped between castle walls and gardens until light broke through and she was free to leave discreetly.

Tomorrow… Tomorrow she would head home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natalia!! She doesn't get enough love. I love her.


	3. Too Many Very Important People In One Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Feora avoids their responsibilities once again due to curiosity. And then due to being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Time for an argument!

Feora collected her things from the inn the next morning. Dread and worry tied her stomach in knots, even as she smiled to the innkeepers while leaving. With closed eyes and a slow sigh, she tried to calm herself. It took several days to even get close to the city. It would be okay. Maybe. There would at least be time to plan.

She would head towards the docks to see if any naval missions were headed towards Chesedonia. It would be faster through the ports there than to travel up the entire continent. To ease her mind a little more, she bought a fresh plum from a nearby vendor and spent her morning enjoying the sunlight and the sweetness on during the walk. Vibrant markets always put her in a good mood. It was one reason why she liked Chesedonia so much, but Baticul’s bustle was often just as busy. 

There was a salesman shouting about new fontech gadgets that Feora was interested in for a moment, before being stopped by a few children playing tag through the streets. They almost avoided knocking over the standing sign for one of the vendors, but alas, seconds later there was a clatter and they were being berated by the owner. Just everyday things that Feora couldn’t help but feel made the world move normally. 

The hustle continued to the shipyard, where traders and porters set up their supplies and cargo. Feora allowed herself to glance at the curious odds and ends on some of the stalls, before she almost ran head first into a navy blue uniform. She stepped back quickly, with the awkward chuckle that always came with sidestepping another. “Sorry!”

Looking up, her spine tingled for just a moment when she made eye contact with none other than the Very Important Colonel from St. Binah. What a strange coincidence.. But not one she could mull over right away. She was a different person, after all, and gave an apologetic smile before shuffling to the side to walk past him.

“Pardon me,” he said in response, to exactly what ends she couldn’t be sure, because his sidestep only got in her way again. Usually, it was an honest awkward dance, this kind of thing. Before she could chuckle and apologize  _ again _ to get out of his way, he said something that wasn’t in the script. “We’ve met before, haven’t we?”

Oh. O-ho! Well, this was a rare treat. They had only met once, and yet he associated the Jester with this young woman before him. Excitement buzzed in Feora’s chest as she frowned at him. “I… don’t think so, sir?” she said warily. 

“No?” He looked like he didn’t believe her for a second. Though she was thrilled at the challenge, she was also almost insulted. Her disguise was perfect, thank you very much. 

“No, I don’t recognize you, sir,” Feora said. She curtsied in a polite fashion. “Excuse me.”

She stepped again to leave, but he was once again beside her. Persistent little bugger. “Are you quite sure? I seem to have some recollection of  _ St. Binah… _ ”

“Sir, I don’t know you,” Feora said firmly, her frown growing more nervous as she glanced around for help. “And I certainly-” she paused and looked at him for a second longer. Her eyes widened, and he looked amused at the act for about half of a second before she said, “S-St. Binah? Why would I ever-- That uniform..!” A lovely fluster crossed her face as she looked around again for help.

“Yes?”

“You- You’re from Malkuth!” she cried, her voice rising frantically as she backed away. The tone of panic in her voice caught the attention of more than a few people, looking at the pair curiously. They both noticed it, though Feora with quite a bit more triumph than him. He seemed quite ready to smooth out the distance between them with a few well-chosen words, but Feora wouldn’t let him get the chance. “S-Stay away! Malkuth! A spy!” she turned towards the people watching, their guards rising instantly.

It was perfect.

With panicked cries, she disappeared into a crowd that was now amassing at the side, looking at the foreign soldier. If she recalled correctly, he had been trying to keep his profile low even in his own country, so Feora didn’t expect a pursuit.

And she was right. The man adjusted his glasses and introduced himself to the nearest officer, before heading in a different direction with a well polished neutral expression. It looked like she’d barely annoyed him at all! That was no fun. But still, watching him from afar, she saw his gaze sweeping the crowds, seemingly searching for a familiar face.

....She had probably best get out of town quickly, she realized. She sighed and adjusted her outfit just enough to be unnoticed at first glance. She paused partway through, frowning. Last time she had seen the Very Important Colonel, he had had the Fon Master with him. Grand Maestro Mohs had said last night that the boy was holed up sickly in Daath.

She grimaced at herself. No. No, she had a  _ task _ to do. She had to get what she knew to Malkuth, to protect the people of St. Binah if nothing else. But.. but who was lying to the Grand Maestro if Fon Master Ion was here? What if he was here? What would that  _ mean _ _?_ Why was the Order working from such different directions?

It was technically related, Feora figured. If Mohs himself was lying about the Fon Master’s condition, then it would certainly say somethin about his character regarding the report. Feora clenched her fists and pinched herself. No. No, no, no, she would get on that ship and go. She would.

She took another step towards the ticketing station, and then another, and then groaned internally and turned right back around. She would have to sleep outside tonight again, too, she decided with frustration. If the Very Important Soldier was able to notice her so easily, then she couldn’t risk being stuck at the same inn as him. Feora cursed herself and her curiosity as she headed back through the markets, keeping her eyes peeled for unusual green hair. 

Perhaps she would take a few hours to change disguises before continuing.

* * *

By the next morning, Feora had searched thoroughly for the Fon Master. At least, he had searched as thoroughly as he could. Just to be safe, he was attempting to stay well clear of the Very Important Colonel, but since it was likely the two were travelling together it was a rather difficult task. He had seen the Very Important Colonel leave from the royal plateau -- alone it seemed. After that, Feora had combed through the plateau in the daylight, posing as a tourist in order to try and get a glimpse of anything happening that was out of the ordinary.

Feora knew it would be stupid to risk sneaking in a second time, especially with this many foreign dignitaries around. Hell, he probably wouldn’t have even tried to sneak in last night if he knew that they were expecting more than just Mohs. He did the best he could that day, and stayed watchful in the night before he decided it was too much hassle to watch guards throughout the night. They would camp outside of town, and leave at dawn, even without finding anything else. He couldn’t keep stalling.

So, Feora hid himself in the woods at the end of the day and cleared his skin of their latest disguise and makeup in a nearby river. They would travel minimally to prepare themself for the end of the journey, and what lay at home. A jolt of fear reminded them of what that was, and they hurriedly set to arranging a small fire for dinner before bed in order to distract themself.

In the morning, they emerged bright and early from the woods, hoping that the sunlight outside would do a bit in the way of warming them up. That was when they spotted the familiar car that had brought them to Baticul in the first place, and they thanked Lady Luck three times over. It was so much nicer to travel with good company.

It was decidedly less nice when said good company had weapons drawn and were surrounding a Very Important Fon Master with smug looks and a stranger nearby, directing them. Feora’s heart stuttered in their chest, but before they could retreat, Noir had spotted them. There was no point in pretending they hadn’t seen. They held a hand in greeting, swallowing hard as Noir visibly grimaced and swore at the other two, who then looked at them.

The stranger turned too, and Feora recognized the uniform: one of the Six God-Generals. A God-General -- oh, Lorelai, was it Asch the  _ Bloody?  _ \-- and the Fon Master of the Order of Lorelai, were both staring them down now. Scowls from their nearest and dearest friends were not far behind, and Feora felt rather like a child coming home for a scolding as they approached.

The God-General drew his sword. “Who is this?” he demanded, his voice cold.

“A teammate,” Noir said quickly, looking at Feora like they had better behave or the classification might change. “Nobody to worry about. C’mon. Let’s get in the car.”

Feora couldn’t help themself. “Noir--” 

“Get in the car,” Noir snapped at them. “We’ll talk later.”

“But that’s..” Feora stared at the Fon Master. A small boy, really, who was apparently taking being  _ kidnapped _ like a champ. He looked more sad about it than frightened. “This is dangero-”

“Now, Feste!” Noir demanded, jerking her head towards the car. “We’re leaving with or without you.”

Feora assumed that they should be glad that Noir still had the sense to use their stage name in front of these strangers, but their stomach felt like a rock. They shut up, just like Noir wanted, and dragged themself to the car, where York and Urushi had already placed the Fon Master. Asch the fucking Bloody was watching Feora with outright suspicion, which was fair, they figured, as they silently passed and climbed in as well. It was only after that that he joined them in the back. Within moments, Noir began to drive.

Feora felt sick. They curled up in their corner of the car, barely brave enough to sneak glances at anyone else. York looked as unbothered as ever, save for the vein popping out on his forehead a little. Urushi was watching Fon Master Ion and Asch the Bloody to be sure they didn’t get up to no good. Asch the Bloody was stoic, save for the suspicious glares all around. The Fon Master, meanwhile, only looked disappointed and pensive. The poor boy, Feora thought bitterly. He was what, barely thirteen? And it seemed like being whisked away by strangers in this fashion wasn’t completely foreign to him.

The Fon Master caught them looking, and Feora put their head down into their arms before they felt more sick. They didn’t want any part of this. They didn’t want their  _ family _ having any part of this. It was too late now, though. Feora couldn’t betray their family, and they had already taken the job. If Feora knew one thing about Noir, it was that she would never let a job fall through without a  _ very _ good reason. Feora’s morals were not one of those.

But this… this could get them killed if they were discovered. This went beyond petty thefts, beyond even a larger heist. What could they be thinking?

Feora chanced a glance back up at York, whose eyes were serious despite the grin plastered on his face as always. Feora didn’t know what to read out of the expression. Instead, they closed their eyes and prayed that wherever they were going, the ride would not be long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> golly gosh if you're reading this im so grateful to you for reading this far. I'll probably post more later!!


	4. Secret Jobs and Secret Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Feora is angry at their family, but then also remembers that they are OBVIOUSLY invincible so everything will be fine. Adios amigos.

For all accounts and purposes, it was not too far that the Dark Wings travelled. It felt like forever, though. Feora dreaded the argument that was no doubt going to happen the moment Asch the Bloody and Fon Master Ion were gone. They were dreading the two leaving almost more. They should be stopping whatever was happening. They should be saving the young boy from his kidnappers. Their _friends_ shouldn’t be kidnappers! The weight of guilt, shame, and fear kept Feora silent the whole way -- which seemed fine by everyone else in the vehicle.

When the time came, and Asch called them to a stop, Feora did nothing to stop him from dragging away the Fon Master. They couldn’t even stand to look at the boy. They waited in place until whatever deal the Dark Wings had made was over with, and they could get out of here. They needed to _leave._

“Feora.”

Noir’s voice cracked like a whip across Feora’s spine. They hated this.

“Noir,” they answered, their voice taut. “Your job is done then?”

Noir’s expression tightened as well. Urushi was staring at them defiantly, and even York seemed tense. “You decided you want nothing to do with it,” Noir reminded them.

“I thought _‘it’_ was snatching purses and conning nobles,” Feora retorted, scowling. “That was the _Fon Mast-_ ”

“You have nothing to do with it!” Noir interrupted them. She crossed her arms, scowling in return. “You have nothing to judge us with, when you’ve decided to run off on your own.”

“I- I’m not abandoning-!”

“Yer not helpin’ neither,” Urushi pointed out. “An’ we got a town to run.”

Feora swallowed their guilt. “I’m trying,” they said desperately.

“And so are the others,” York added. “Everyone’s getting by, but we gotta do what we gotta do.”

“If you get caught you could be killed!” Feora protested, clenching their fists. “Then what would we do, huh?”

Noir stood firm. “You really think they could catch _us?_ Fat chance, Feora.”

“Do you even know what he’s planning to do to that boy?” Feora demanded.

“No, and neither do you,” came the response.

“So if they just kill him right now, you’d be _fine_ with it?”

“Yes.”

Feora’s breath halted in their chest, and they stared at their old friends with horror. “..Yes?”

“We work for no one but us. We owe the kingdoms jack shit, and the Order of Lorelai even less,” Noir said. “I don’t care whether we never hear about this again, or whether it dredges up some chaotic uprising that was already coming. We owe this world _nothing._ ”

Feora’s chest tightened. “But… the people. There could be so many people hurt by this..”

“You act like we don’t know that,” York said plainly. “But frankly, Feora, you can’t tell us to let the family starve because you don’t want us getting involved in high risks.”

“It’s _too_ high,” Feora insisted.

“We’re the ones ta decide that,” Urushi said.

Feora clenched their fists and looked across the three of them, their expressions all set in stone, before growling in frustration and turning away. “Dammit!”

Noir took that to be the end of the discussion. “We’re going to Chesedonia. Are you riding with us?”

Feora grimaced, and took a while to answer. They didn’t want to leave their friends like this, but sitting in that god awful car for three hours in this awkward silence would be worse. This was the worst. “To the oasis,” they answered sullenly. “I’ll travel on my own from there.”

“Whatever you say,” Noir answered with a shrug, heading to the driver's seat once again. “Waste of energy if you ask me.”

“I didn’t,” Feora snipped back, feeling bad about it the second they said it. They tried to hide that, and went back to their spot in the car to stew.

* * *

Feora hated that their friends were idiots. They hated them so much. They hated being angry at them, and they hated that they were _dumb._ Feora also hated that at the end of a long trek from the Oasis and a costume change, he was lingering at the edge of a stall to _apologize_ to them, even if _they_ were the dumb ones. Ugh.

Feora approached them anyways because he would feel bad about it for ages if he didn’t make good with his family. “Looks like rain,” he said gruffly, almost feeling Urushi-like in grump-ness.

York and Urushi glanced at the clear sky for half a second, but Noir didn’t bother. She held a hand out to York expectantly. “Pay up.”

“Awwww, man!” York whined, digging into his pocket and giving Feora a betrayed look. “You couldn’t have held out a bit longer? I had such high hopes..”

Feora scowled, even though the exasperation felt more like that of fondness than anger. “You’re making bets on me?” he asked with a withering look.

“Course they did,” Urushi said plainly. “Been waitin’ here for ya.”

“I said you’d come find us within the day,” Noir said loftily, holding the gald she had just acquired in the air to look at it lazily.

If Feora had feathers, they would be ruffled. “I’m not that predictable!”

“Hah, maybe not to normal folk,” Noir said with a smirk. “So, done being angry yet?”

Feora huffed and crossed his arms. “No,” he said, just for the sake of it. “But- Look, I just don’t want you guys getting hurt.”

“We know,” York answered, nodding.

“And- And it’s dangerous and-”

“We know,” Urushi also put in, nodding.

“And I couldn’t handle it if-”

“We know,” Noir finished, finally looking to Feora. “Really, you act like it’s some big revelation. We love you too.”

Feora huffed grumpily to hide that they felt choked up and embarrassed still. “Just… please promise me you’ll be careful..”

“Of course we will,” Noir told him. “So, where were you headed in the first place?”

Feora took a breath and a moment to compose himself. He loved this dumb family so much. They infuriated him, but there was no one else he trusted more. His stomach dropped a little, remembering his task at hand. “Grand Chokmah,” he said, voice almost wavering. “I have… something important to do there.”

The three looked at him quizzically, but York shrugged. “Bet we can getcha there.”

“I’d appreciate the help,” Feora admitted. “And.. well.. I dunno, it’ll be good to be with you guys beforehand.”

Urushi frowned. “Well that’s startin’ ta sound way too serious.”

Feora agreed, and his face plaster over into a grin to fix it. “Oops.”

“If yer gonna get all mad about us bein’ dangerous, then we get ta do the same ta you, you hear?” Urushi pointed at him. “So don’t go bein’ dumb.”

“This, coming from _you_ ,” Feora teased with a sigh.

“Oi-!”

But as their squabble was just beginning, Noir was pleased to see a familiar walking paycheck. “Oho~ Imagine running into you again so soon.” The others turned to follow her gaze to be met with the same red-headed, glaring man from before. Feora shut up quickly, even knowing that he wouldn’t recognize him. 

Seemed he didn’t recognize much of anything, though. “Huh? What the hell are you talking about?” he demanded, scowling at the three.

“Hey, feel free to hit us up with another job any time,” Urushi said, grinning at Asch the Bloody and raising his glass -- which his money had probably bought.

“Who are you?” ...Asch the Bloody? Demanded.

“Didn’t take you to be a kidder, Asch,” York commented. 

Feora did not have to pretend to look confused. Nor did Noir, who scowled right back at him and came closer, looking him over carefully. To Feora, they looked the same, minus the clothes. Maybe a hairstyle? “Oh…? You’re not Asch, are you?”

“Hey! Tell me what you know about Asch!” the man demanded, his voice rising petulantly. Well, Asch certainly hadn’t sounded like _that_. Twins, perhaps? Noir spared a glance back to York and Urushi, who both looked rather serious. She gave a fleeting glance to Feora, who gave a barely perceptible nod. Noir hummed and a moment later smoke exploded around the trio, leaving Not Asch, and Feora (for good measure) coughing in place.

“Hey! What the hell?!” Not Asch shouted. Feora rejoined him with some sort of yelling that the other patrons of the little bar seemed to join in with before they started to cough too. Then they complained about sand in their beer, which Feora could sympathize with, even if they were in the middle of a desert and it was kind of to be expected. 

“Luke!” a stern female voice called out from the other side of Not Asch. “What are you doing?”  
“These three weird guys were there!”

Feora followed the voice, as did Not Asch, who must then be Luke. It would have been nobody of note had it not been for a familiar uniform. Feora cursed his luck, and quickly turned away to follow a group of grumbly fellows who were leaving the dusty patio. Hopefully the swapped gender would keep this Very Important Colonel from spotting him. Or maybe his Very Important Not Asch the Bloody would. Either way, Feora had to get _out._

So, he wandered away, mingling close enough to the small crowd of drunken friends to look like one of them with the way he wobbled. He kept an ear out behind him, and was lucky to have done so, because he heard a distinct, “Colonel? Where are you going?”

He didn’t need to hear more. Feora slipped into a crack between stalls, trying to hurriedly end up on the other side, out of sight. What he found even more annoying was the sound of being followed. Ugh.

Neither of them wanted to cause a scene here, Feora knew. Feora certainly didn’t want to get caught, since he couldn’t pull another Malkuth trick like last time -- but he really hoped that the Colonel was still keeping a low profile. He sped up his steps to keep distance between them, trying to slip in and out of bustling crowds and between stalls like a natural city-dweller, keeping the Colonel far, far away.

The pace of his steps only kept increasing. They were both… well, not _running_ per say, but it definitely wasn’t walking. No, at this point it was absolutely clear that this was a chase, and that the Colonel was going to be persistent about getting answers. Feora hated giving answers. Before they could gradually escalate into a run, Feora _sprinted_ in another direction.

He needed just a little time. A little time to get ahead and end this.

It took him a few seconds to get to the inn. Shouts followed them, many of surprise and many people checking for their wallets after he passed. Somewhere in there, he expected that the Colonel had said something too. Eyes followed him warily as he dashed through the entry room of the inn, only slightly assuaged by the hand that he rose in greeting with an apologetic smile like he was late for something. It was bullshit, but just enough bullshit to make the people inside pause and scan their memories for a chance meeting with him.

It was enough bullshit to get upstairs, into the empty hallways of rooms, and slink into one of them. Thank Lorelai, Yulia, and all of her disciples that it was empty. Feora had to pause to slow his breath. It wasn’t over. He would be trapped here if he couldn’t pull off this next disguise flawlessly -- and without the time to work with his bag of tricks, it would be far more challenging.

Another slow breath in, and Feora reached out to open their fon slots to an ever-comforting presence. Warmth thrummed through their veins a second after their call, greeting them with the same familiar amusement. Humans were such lively little things. Feora looked in the little mirror that hung above the dresser in the room, and could see their partner, mentor, and friend swirling in a black whisper across their eyes.

 _What do you need?_ _To craft another appearance? Yes, you may use us as you see fit._

Feora breathed again, calming themself and nodding. They reached out in the gentlest of ways with their fon slots, attempting to almost caress the fonons around them into place. A few more here -- absorb the light -- a few more there -- darken the skin. Feora was able to nearly physically press clumps of the first fonon into the creases of their face, darkening wrinkles they did not yet have, and making their eyes look tired and old. 

Their bag of tricks held a new costume, a dress that would do. They rapidly changed, and placed the bag underneath the dress to their back. They took a scarf and wrapped it around their head in a shawl, before curling over like a withered leaf and glancing at themself in the mirror. They made a few, small adjustments to the fonons -- ensuring their hair was grey, and their skin an even tone -- before nodding once and taking a breath. _Thank you_ , they breathed into the air around them, earning a satisfied hum from the fonons, which held their place.

Feora stepped outside, hobbling slowly like her joints were creaking. When she reached the stairs, the Colonel was visible at the entrance, his eyes somehow bored and yet as sharp as a hawk as he scanned the people already there. Feora could barely hold back a smirk. He was going to be so upset in just a few minutes, she almost felt bad for him. Better luck next time, champ.

She took the steps slowly, one at a time, and he barely glanced at her once. Feora felt smugness rise in her chest, but made sure to thank the fonons around her once again. She knew she never would have gotten away with this if it weren’t for her impossible ally. Said ally seemed to be enjoying it as well, though, as an amused ripple was sent through her spine after her stomach jolted in excitement.

Well, if it had been looking for a good time, Feora was always one to provide. She happily continued to hobble out of the inn, passing the Colonel with no trouble at all. Poor boy.

Feora bit down on her smirk all the way to the outskirts of the city. Once free from prying eyes, she let the spell drop, the fonons flying free from her and into the wild. They laughed, and closed their eyes a moment to thank their friend once again. Artes were all well and good, but Feora knew their partnership was something special, and they wouldn’t trade it for the world. If all else fell to shit in Grand Chokmah, as it all had before, Feora knew they had the First Fonon.

And, for what little worth it was, the First Fonon knew it had them. If for nothing but a bit of amusement from the shadows.

Feora let the energy of their escape fuel them as they made a beeline for the remains of the Rotelro Bridge once again. They had a job to finish, and some friends willing to drop them right at Grand Chokmah’s doorstep. It would be fine. It always was, when Feora knew that nothing could stop them.

Nothing at all.

Not a Very Important Colonel, or a grumpy God-General, or being caught infiltrating a castle. Not even hidden memories and doubts. If this didn’t work… well, something would.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feora's kinda.. cocky. We get to have fun with that later. BUT please tell me if you want to talk fonons i have a way too convoluted theory connecting tales games by using fonons and spirits and stuff and its FUN.
> 
> I love you if you read this. And I mean you. YOU right there. I love you.


	5. A Really Dumb Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feora goes home! Where's home? WELL. (CW: this is where the misgendering starts to happen because Feora doesn't usually talk about that kinda stuff and people assume.)

Hah. Yeah. Something would work out, they said. Funny, because they certainly didn’t feel that way _now._

They had frozen before leaving the boat, seeing Grand Chokmah in the distance. They had been able to skip crossing Theor forest, and found a small docking point at the edge. Feora knew it was good they had skipped the forest, because right now they felt like going and hiding in it for a few years was a _great_ idea.

Noir looked at them curiously after they had hesitated. “...Just what was this _thing_ you said you had to do?”

“I-It’s… nothing,” Feora said lamely.

“Clearly it isn’t, Feora,” she answered. She sighed and got out of the boat to join Feora. “What do you need?”

Feora looked at her for a moment and swallowed their fear. “Got any extra courage?”

“Got some booze in the back,” Urushi helpfully told them, eliciting a bark of a laugh.

Noir looked them over carefully. “You’re going back to your home, aren’t you?” she asked in a low tone.

Feora paled, but nodded. If only they knew just what that meant… they supposed that even for the rest of them going home to a place that had ousted them would be nerve wracking. But Feora had never been ousted.. Feora had never told their family who they were, or what they came from, and yet here they were -- with unending support.

“Why’ve you gotta do that?” York asked, frowning. “Didn’t they kick you out?”

Feora forced a smirk. “I never said that. You all just like your guessing games too much.”

“Huh?” York paused.

Noir sighed before he could speak again, and put a hand on Feora’s shoulder, making them jump a little. “Hey, no matter what happens in there, you’ve got family here, kay?” she said firmly. “Even if you are a pain in the ass.”

Feora nodded, feeling their heart clench. “Noir… i-if things change..”

“They won’t,” Noir interrupted them. “I don’t care what you’re about to say. Do what you gotta do, same as us.” The other two nodded in agreement.

Feora held their breath, and nodded with them. “..Okay.”

“Good. Now get gone,” Noir said with a playful shove towards the city. Feora waved to them before making the painfully slow trek towards Grand Chokmah.

* * *

“You’re the one with the fonstone?” a harsh voice stood on the other end of the gigantic doors. Guards flanked her on either side, and two more stood just outside the entrance to Feora’s sides. It was really uncomfortable. Or, at least, that was what Feora assumed was making them uncomfortable. It definitely had nothing to do with the fact that they hadn’t crafted a disguise for this visit at all. Definitely. They could walk around normally as themself. Obviously.

They nodded in a meek response. Super brave of them.

“Let us see,” the woman said, holding out a hand.

Feora was clutching the stone so tightly that it left indents in their palm. They held it out, barely more than a shard’s worth, but it was still a fonstone. The Empire would take any bit of the Score they could take, and so would Kimlasca.

The woman reached out to take it, but Feora pulled their hand back. “I.. would see the Emperor hear what it has to say,” they said, trying to sound firm. It didn’t really work.

“Oh?” The woman scrutinized Feora for a moment, narrowing her eyes. “That would be highly irregular. And I’m afraid it’s quite out of the question to let an unnamed and unknown-”

“I’m known as Feste, the performer,” Feora said. They couldn’t… bring themself to say their name. “That is… well, it’s the most well known name I have.”

The woman scowled, though Feora could tell that she _had_ heard the name before. Well, that boosted their ego a little bit! 

“Nonetheless, you are a stranger,” she said.

“I also bring news from Kimlasca,” Feora told her, their hand reaching for a pocket. They pulled out an envelope, marked with the seal of Grand Maestro Mohs. “And from the Grand Maestro, personally.”

The woman stiffened, and scowled further. A few moments passed, and she said, “You are to wait here until called. Know that I’ll have guards watching you from every position.”

Feora let out a small breath of relief, and also terror, and nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

The woman turned on her heel and led Feora into the marble built palace. Feora found that they paused the second they stepped inside anyway, so waiting would be no problem. Somehow the stone walls and beautiful artistry only felt… suffocating. They held tight to the fonstone and prayed to Lady Luck that they would be okay.

It was a long wait. Almost long enough for Feora’s terror to make way for a bit of boredom. Almost. But they still jumped when the woman reemerged suddenly from another room. “The Emperor will see you. On the condition that you are to remain guarded, and ten feet from the throne at all times,” she informed Feora.

Feora nodded quickly, swallowing the lump in their throat. “I understand. Thank you.”

The woman nodded, and turned to the nearby guards to get almost a veritable _troop_ of them to cover Feora as they walked through the palace. If they weren’t suffocating before, they certainly were now. 

The chamber they were led to was large and open. Natural light filtered through it, along with the sound of running water. The echoes of the door closing behind them did nothing to help calm Feora’s nerves.

The guards parted so that Feora could speak to the Emperor himself, but their voice caught in their throat when they saw him. They could do little more than stare at him, and imagine expressions across his carefully calm face. Was that surprise? Recognition? Or was that only wishful thinking? They felt they were too much of a mess themself to be able to read him.

“...Well?” the woman demanded from the side. The Emperor, Peony, shuffled a little, and his face split into a reassuring smile. Feora wanted to cry.

“Y-Yes, sorry,” they said quickly, holding out the fonstone again, this time letting it be taken away. That in itself almost felt like being ripped of all their secrets.

“And the message?”

Feora nodded, and held that out next, shaking.

The next voice to speak was softer however, intoned with hints of mirth and confidence. “...So, they tell me you’re a performer,” Peony spoke, looking interested.

Feora bowed their head in response. “Yes, your majesty,” they said. “But.. Grand Chokmah is my home.”

“I see. So this is why you chose to bring this information to me, instead of your residence in Kimlasca.”

“I have performed for both nations,” Feora said. “But yes.”

Peony looked curious, and turned to the Seventh Fonist they had in attendance. “Will you read the Score for us?”

The Fonist bowed to him, and took the shard. Though it was small, it lit up brilliantly as they read. “ _N.D. 2018. When duty calls, the lost heir shall return to the place of her birth for the first time since the slaughter of her line. She will bear a letter of truth within a sacred seal-_ ”

Feora swallowed, feeling like the air around them was tense. The Score cut off there, but everything was tense. They hated this. They couldn’t even look at the people in the room, preferring to stare at their own shoes. They had worn mismatched socks. Why would they do that?

“Lost heir..?” Peony whispered, only to himself, looking to his advisors. The advisors looked wary, and whispered to him before handing him the envelope. This was where Feora _really_ hoped they wouldn’t get in trouble.

“This.. letter,” Peony began. The word was deliberate. Did that mean he suspected who they were? Or merely suspected what they were trying to say they were? “It’s closed with the Grand Maestro’s seal.”

“Yes, your majesty,” Feora said quietly.

“Sacred, some would say.” Peony continued.

Feora felt their stomach clench, and they couldn’t say another word. This was too much. A few moments of strained silence passed, and Feora chanced looking up at the Emperor. Their heart felt like a pile of rocks as he looked them over carefully, and they looked down again. The sound of the wax seal breaking, paper rustling. Feora closed their eyes and tried to stand tall.

Peony took in a breath of a gasp, and his advisors followed suit only a few seconds later. Feora stayed where they were, trying to keep their own breath in line, and their heart from beating out of it’s chest. Inside was simply a note -- one that they had scrawled in the Kimlascan bedchambers of the Grand Maestro, and sealed with his own symbol.

> _My name is Feora Atenas Malkuth II._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh here's where it gets REAL mary sue but genderfluid. morgan sue? Whatever.


	6. You Can Tell I've Watched Labyrinth Too Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which everyone goes "ur not royalty thats fake and dumb" and Feora's like "yeah ur right but here's some news" and then gets put in a fancy prison cell but we ignore that later.

“It is just not possible, your majesty!”

“It would be folly to simply accept this _stranger’s_ words for truth!”

“Nonsense, you think I can’t recognize my own sister?” Peony’s voice was so… okay with it. He didn’t sound suspicious in the slightest. That made Feora suspicious themself. They frowned in shock, and finally looked at him again. He was beaming at them.

“Appearances can be crafted, your majesty!” the advisors were trying to get him to do _anything_ but accept this. Feora’s heart felt like it was going to explode.

“And when was the last time the Score was wrong, Nordbert? Oh, that’s right, never.”

A new advisor spoke. “The truth of the Score can be _manipulated_ in ways we cannot see. The lost heir will come this year, surely, but it is not necessarily this…” the advisor looked at Feora with disdain. “Harlequin.”

“You don’t know that any more than I know it to be true,” Peony insisted in a roundabout manner. “If you’re so unsure of it, then that shows the _importance_ of letting the Council have a say. Until then, we treat, Feora-”

“Feste,” Feora whispered, though they weren’t sure they were even heard.

“-with respect and dignity.”

“Your majesty, this is unwise..”

“It’s what we’re doing until the Council says otherwise,” Peony said firmly. “Please, prepare a room for our guest to stay in. A _guest_ room, not a dungeon room, in case you were planning on being sneaky about it.”

There were a few more protests, but Feora barely heard them. They were too busy hearing the wind rushing in their ears, and their own heart having an aneurysm. He believed them? Just like that? But.. he hadn’t even spoken to them for more than a minute. They could be _anyone_. He hadn’t even heard the news from--

Feora broke into the squabbling, realizing that this wasn’t even the reason they were enduring this torture. “I do have information about the Grand Maestro,” they said suddenly. “That’s the real reason I’m here.”

The squabblers looked at them for a second, before Peony smiled and gestured for them to continue. Feora took a breath.

“Someone informed the Grand Maestro that an attack force is being built at St. Binah. I don’t know who exactly is lying to who, but the Grand Maestro has told the King this. He will have as of yesterday, in fact.”

“And how do you know this?” an advisor spoke up, distrusting. That was more like it.

“I was in the castle, and heard it from the Grand Maestro himself,” Feora said. In a manner of speaking, since he had written the report, but still.

“Then this seal?” an older man this time, holding the paper.

“Is my proof that I was there,” Feora answered. “Look, I don’t care about any of the… guest rooms or whatever. I needed you to know that Kimlasca thinks we’re going to attack from St. Binah. The city isn’t prepared for an assault, especially if we don’t know it’s coming.”

Peony’s gleeful look had vanished into deep thought. “Who would be spreading false information to Kimlasca…?” he murmured to himself, frowning. His advisors spoke a few mumbled responses, and eventually Peony shook himself. “Right. Thank you, Feora. Now that I know, I can send a warning to the city.”

Feora nodded stiffly, shuffling.

“In the meantime, you should rest,” Peony said. “The Council will want you to stay here until they reach a decision anyway.”

Feora swallowed and nodded again. “Th-Thank you, your majesty…”

A look that they couldn’t quite decipher crossed his expression, but it was gone with a wave of his hand. “Don’t mention it.” Another wave and a nod, and the woman from before was in front of Feora, leading them out of the room. The stony silence she held showed just what she thought of the proceedings. Honestly, Feora wished they could just run away now -- but they were still flanked by guards on all sides.

They came to a doorway, which the woman opened and ushered Feora into. It was an extravagant guest room, styled just as Feora remembered them. This was real, wasn’t it? Feora looked around, and the woman stared at her suspiciously.

“Guards will be outside your door at all hours. Make no mistake that this is a holding cell, even if his Majesty did not intend so.”

Feora looked to the woman for a moment, but honestly, the thought of being detained for this seemed far more reasonable than what had happened. They nodded, and actually smiled for her -- their best carefree smile from their performances. “Thank you.”

The woman sniffed, turned on her heel, and left.

Feora fell onto the bed and screamed into a pillow.

* * *

A knock came at the door later, which Feora really wasn't expecting. They also really weren't expecting Emperor Peony Upala Malkuth the Ninth to be on the other side, grinning at them like a child. Their eyes widened and they backed up quickly. "U-Uh. Hi. Er- hi, your majesty?"

"And hi to you too, your highness," he said with a playful look. It only amplified when Feora couldn't help but look absolutely _horrified_ at the title. He laughed at them. "Yeah, that's what I thought too."

Feora looked him over, really caught off guard. This was… not how it was supposed to go. "Why are you… here?" They looked at the door. "Alone? Shouldn't someone be here making sure I don't kill you?"

"I'm not allowed to visit my own sister?"

Feora shuffled and frowned. "You don't know that I'm not lying."

"Yeah I do," Peony said with a wave of his hand. "The Score isn't wrong, and you're the spitting image of the picture in the Dining Hall, not to mention my own memories."

"That's.. not really super solid evidence," Feora said.

"No? Well, how about this then," Peony smirked. "Mom's favorite dessert."

Feora felt like they'd been struck. "M-Mine or yours?" Peony shrugged innocently. "Mine.. liked angel food cake with raspberries… your mother liked peach cobbler."

"See? No hesitation, right answer, and that's a dumb question to put on the royalty test," Peony said. He grinned at Feora, but looked ever so slightly knocked down when they didn't move. "C'mon, Feora. Sit with me. I want to know everything."

Feora shook themself. This had to be a dream. Fifteen years ago they had resigned themself to never being able to speak to Peony again; to letting him think they were dead, and watch from the side. "But.." they blinked and fought the emotions in their chest. "This isn't.."

"Please," Peony said. "I could say that I need your story for the council, but.. I haven't had a family since back then, Feora. Let us reminisce. Just a bit."

Feora hesitated, but eventually stepped forward and sat on the couch beside him. "It's.. not that glamorous," they said quietly. "A lot has changed."

"Well yeah, you've got a whole life by now, huh? Feste the entertainer?" Peony asked with a smile that seemed to melt away all semblance of anxiety.

"Y-Yeah. I've been… a jester, I guess you could say. I've been part of a troupe for… at least fifteen years now," Feora said.

"A troupe? Like a circus troupe?"

Feora rubbed the back of their neck. "Yeah. I'm a glorified clown. Can juggle, too."

Peony looked amused. "Well, that's one hell of a change."

Feora chuckled a little. "Yeah.. but it's one of the few groups who'll accept a random starving fourteen year old without asking too many questions."

Peony's expression fell a little. "How.. did you escape? And what did you do?"

"I don't.. Honestly, I think it was just Lady Luck," Feora said. "I hid, and then I ran.. I just happened to make it out of the city. I guess they figured I wouldn't last long alone in Theor."

"I wouldn't expect an adult to last long alone in Theor," Peony said.

Feora gave a half-smile. "I was lucky. So much so that it sounds fake the more I think about it."

"It'll be hard to convince the Council, then.." Peony sighed.

"I'm not… really worried about doing that," Feora said. "So long as I'm not, like, killed or whatever. I.. don't do well in one place anymore."

"Life on the road?"

Feora nodded. "And.. your advisors are right. I use a new identity for every town when I'm not Feste. I haven't.. just been like this for years." They hugged their arms a little with a dry laugh. "Honestly, I'd have an easier time talking to you if I looked like a fool now. It's much easier to be a fool."

Peony looked at them for a moment, a mixture of confusion and curiosity crossing his brow. "Well.. you got a costume or something with you?"

Feora blinked. "Something like that, yeah."

"Let me see? I've never seen a performance by you, after all."

Feora felt their stomach clench a little. "I- Well. Yeah, okay." They stood to grab their bag of tricks, and sat on the floor with it before honestly upending the whole thing. They caught the balls that began to roll away with their feet and cradled them into the pile. 

Peony's eyebrows raised at the pile before them. "Wow. That's a lot of stuff."

Feora chuckled slightly. "A bag of tricks isn't very tricky if it's empty."

"Okay, but what _is_ all of it?"

Feora picked out a few garments, setting them aside before finding their performance gear. "Well, this is my outfit," they said, holding it up and letting it jingle floppily all over. "And this has my face paint in it. My makeup for other disguises is in this one." They held up two boxes.

"Disguises?"

Feora nodded. "I don't… like being recognized. Once I'm done being Feste, I switch it up so that I can do something new."

Peony held out a hand, and Feora handed him one of the boxes. He opened it and looked aghast. "There's a beard in here!"

Feora honestly just laughed at that. "Of course there is! I can't limit myself to one gender, after all. Too obvious."

Peony looked amused and handed it back. "The Council would have a fit if you mentioned that, especially if they choose to believe you."

"Maybe I'll keep that quiet, then," Feora said wryly. They pulled things out of the pile and set them aside. "So, these are my juggling balls… my batons, my clubs.."

"What's in that bottle?"

"Oh, that's lighter fluid," Feora said, picking it up. "I soak the batons in it so they stay lit while I juggle them. You can also use it to breathe fire."

"You do _what?_ " Peony sounded shocked, but his eyes sparkled like a small child's. "You juggle flames? And _breathe fire?_ "

Feora couldn't help but smile a little. "Mmhm! I can't just focus on one thing if I'm going to keep my act fresh!"

Peony shook his head in amazement. "It's a wonder you haven't burned all your hair off."

Feora laughed a little. "Well, when I first started I might have once or twice, but you can't tell my audience that."

"Perish the thought," Peony said loftily, looking excited as he scanned the pile. "How about that?"

"Oh, this?" Feora picked up a smaller box. "It's my voice when I'm not doing a play or song."

"Huh?"

Feora smiled and opened it up, before sliding a little semi-circle something into their mouth. A few seconds later, they gave a couple test buzzes. " _Zhoop-zee?_ "

Peony's eyes widened. "What the-"

Feora gave a whistling laugh and waved a hand around like he was complimenting them. A few more babbling, squeaking sentences, and then they stopped and grinned.

"That is ridiculous."

"Yep!" Feora chirped happily. They found their cleaner and placed the whistle in it before putting it away.

"What about those? Do you juggle them too?" Peony pointed to the clear crystal balls, but then slid off the couch to join them on the floor. He looked far too entertained.

"Kinda," Feora answered. "It's called contact juggling, and looks… well, kinda different. It's really cool though. You wanna see?"

" _Yes._ " Peony answered with no hesitation and the excitement of someone learning they had just gotten a Score of prosperity.

Feora grinned and took the crystal balls in hand. They held four, all in one hand, and began to slowly spin them, letting one of them glide to the top of the three moving over their fingers like magic. Peony watched in awe. "It's a bit calmer looking than other performances, but it's pretty mesmerizing," they explained. "Especially with this little trick." They plucked the ball off the top, the three still spinning in their hand, and it seemed to roll of it's own volition over the tips of their fingers. It rolled back and forth and up and down without being held for a second, like it weighed nothing.

Peony was slack-jawed. "Whoa. I've never seen something like that before."

Feora smiled and let the ball rest in their palm before holding it out. "You wanna try?"

"Can I?" Peony's eyes lit up.

"Of course," Feora laughed. "Here, this is how I started. Practice holding the ball on the back of your fingertips, like this. If you lower your middle finger a little, it settles. Then, roll your hand to the front and catch it with those fingers." They demonstrated, going from back to front, then front to back. "Going back is harder."

Peony tried, and the ball ended up flying across the room with a loud thud. He screeched as it flew away from him, and Feora couldn't help but laugh. "That's what-

The door opened, the guards outside standing like they were ready to fight. Feora shut up quickly, but Peony waved a hand. "Just me. Mind grabbing that for me, Aslan?"

The guard in the door hesitated visibly, not really looking at ease with this, but he bent down and picked up the crystal ball. "What is your majesty doing, if I might ask?" he asked, handing the ball back to the emperor.

"Learning to juggle!" Peony said, beaming. "It's my new thing." 

Aslan looked vaguely worried about that prospect. "I.. see."

"Feora! Show Aslan the thing! He'll love it!"

Feora blinked. "Oh. Sure." They began to play with the balls a little more, showing off a few tricks. The guard, Aslan, certainly looked surprised and impressed, but no less committed to his duty. He couldn't bring himself to let his guard down.

"It is impressive, your majesty," he said politely.

Peony grinned. "It's cool! Way cooler than anything I can do."

Feora looked at him, surprised. "What you do is more important than some silly tricks."

"Yeah, but it's not _cool_ ," Peony retorted.

"You're the _Emperor of Malkuth._ How is that not cool?"

"Because it's boring and full of stuffy meetings and angry old men," Peony complained, crossing his arms.

Aslan cleared his throat. "Your majesty…"

Peony sighed. "I know, I know.. Don't worry about me Aslan. I'll be polite. You just have to watch over my babies for me during the next meeting."

Aslan paled. "Y-Your majesty, I have… meetings. With- uh…"

"Hah, liar," Peony pointed at him from the ground. "You get to walk them later, and you can tell me all about the situation in St. Binah."

Aslan drooped. "...Right. Of course, your majesty."

"A walk?" Feora looked between the two curiously. "Babies?"

Aslan sighed. "His majesty raises rappigs."

"Five of them, and they're all cute as a button! You _have_ to come see them when they let you out of this room, Feora! They'll love you!"

That.. that was rather endearing. Feora grinned. "That sounds awesome. It'll be fun. I can help walk them too."

Aslan couldn't hide the glimmer of hope that crossed his expression.

"Yeah! They look so adorable when they're running around the gardens!" Peony's voice got all gushy as he talked about them, and Feora couldn't help but laugh.

“Is that patch of lily of the valley still there?” Feora asked hopefully. “By the west alcove?”  
Aslan looked at them warily for the question, but Peony grinned. “I think so! I never have enough time to explore anymore.”

“Maybe we could-”  
“Your majesty!” A familiar, brusque tone shot through the doorway. Aslan jumped and Peony visibly paled.

“A-Ahaha.. hey.. Victoria…” he said with an awful grin plastered across his face. “You found me…”

“I was never meant to be _looking_ for your majesty in the first place,” Victoria, the woman who had led Feora inside, had her arms crossed and was sternly looking at the emperor. “You are meant to be in the study, filing the papers that are _piling up._

“Aw, but can’t you cut me a little slack? Family emergency?” Peony asked hopefully.

Victoria gave Feora a look that could have frozen Chesedonia before looking back to Peony with the exact same gaze. Oh my. Maybe it wasn’t Feora personally that the woman hated. “The emperor of the greatest nation in the world doesn’t get _slack_ ,” she said through tight lips. “Now you will return to the study before I have to drag you there myself.”

“But Victoriaaaaa…” Peony whined and pouted. Victoria was unmoved. 

“ _Now._ ” 

Peony drooped and picked himself up off the floor. “Damn… I guess I’ll see you later, Feora.”

Feora nodded mutely, and offered a sympathetic smile.  
“Aslan, you’ll have to go apologize to my cute little Jade for me,” Peony told the guard. “I promised him playtime, and you know how he gets.” Aslan looked… pained. Peony didn’t seem to notice and forlornly followed Victoria out of the room. Aslan sighed to himself and began to follow.

“Good luck,” Feora said before he left. They had a feeling he was going to need it. 

He looked back and managed a weak smile, even if mildly suspicious. “Thanks.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are the chapters that I think are boring for others, but I really like them because... bag of tricks.


	7. I Found an Excuse to Make Jade Play Ninja

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I made jade play ninja. on stage. he is not pleased by this, but he does win.

Over the next few days, Feora was subjected to grueling questions about their identity from a bunch of grumpy old men, just like Peony said. Feora really hoped they weren’t expected to stay and deal with the politics of all this. This life wasn’t for them. They needed to be out there on the scene, learning what they could. 

Really, it seemed simple to them. The conclusion that the Council was currently at was: okay what the fuck do we do with her? And Feora’s answer was “I’m just gonna leave okay? Okay.” But they didn’t want to lose the chance to suddenly know their brother again. They remembered him as a young child, before he was sent to Keterburg, but had spent their whole life watching him. He seemed like he barely changed from that adventurous little spitfire he had been. Feora was honestly glad to see that. It made them feel much more comfortable around him. If he had been as prim and proper as the Princess Natalia, they would have probably had to _actually_ run away.

It took time, but the Council began to begrudgingly show signs of giving them a chance. They considered allowing them to leave the city for important missives, as other nobles would, mostly to see if they would attack given the chance. They were allowed to spend time around town, and roam at least _part_ of the palace. The library was one of those parts, though, so Feora was very glad for that!

But then Akzeriuth fell.

It was chaos. 

Suddenly, secrets began pouring out of the stone walls. Every person in the palace seemed to be sharing some new information and Feora wasn’t important enough to hide it from anymore. That suited them just fine. They liked secrets. They liked not being watched.

Peony began to visit them for more and more breaks. He started telling them about his childhood, about his friends, and about Jade the Necromancer -- his best friend who had died with Akzeriuth. Feora had insisted on trying to comfort him over it, but the Emperor waved away every attempt like it was no big deal. With the way Peony talked about him, Feora didn’t believe it.

The palace nobles whispered between them about the war coming. They whispered secret plots, and rumors that another town would come next. Another town of Malkuth’s, destroyed. Feora wasn’t ready to idle by while that happened. They warned Peony that they would be heading to the other towns on the continent the next day. 

Peony tried to stop them, but Feora couldn’t stay still. They insisted that even if he didn’t want them to, they were going. He finally gave in, on the condition that they send a report from each town. Which Feora did as they observed the cracks in the ground, and the deep, gaping abyss that lay where Akzeriuth had. 

The abyss was growing bigger by the day. 

* * *

Times of disaster were times for Feste. People needed distractions, they needed fun and light-hearted laughs to ease the burden of pain. Everyone was in pain. They were at war again, and nearly everyone had lost someone they knew in Akzeriuth. They had made it back to Grand Chokmah a few days prior, and had been working ever since.

Feste had been performing every day and every night. During the day, they would vary their tricks from card games to throwing knives. At night, they would perform at the taverns, singing songs designed to encourage and inspire, and some that were simply meant to bring about a good laugh. 

It was a good thing the Jester had quite a few tricks up their sleeves. Today, it was in the form of a small box theatre. Two crudely shaped puppets popping out from behind it, making crude, screeching sounds and running around each other in the little stage. It was certainly dumb enough to bring people to watch, and many kids found the antics wonderful. 

The story of the day was two soldiers who were meant to be fighting -- fitting, no? -- but for some reason everything they did ended up romantic. The little kids found their giggles in the wild embarrassment of the puppets, and even some of the adults found it amusing to find out how they would fail at fighting next. 

A slow, lilting voice broke through the latest scheme, with the two soldiers _scandalously_ close, and simply said their name. “Feste the Entertainer?” It sounded familiar. And close. From their little box, they frowned and closed their eyes to place it.

The Jester’s head popped up between the two soldiers, who jumped away from each other in horror. The Jester was beaming. It was the Very Important Colonel! And this time, they could say a proper _hello_ , even with their whistling voice.

If the Very Important Colonel was surprised by the joy on the Jester’s face, he did not show it. They let out a bright squeal happily as the crowd stared at the newcomer. Don’t worry, they wouldn’t let him ruin the show. He gave them a passive look as they stood from their crouched spot.

“ _Zweeeee!!_ ” The Jester ran around and gestured for him to come join them center stage. Whether or not he was going to move, the Jester turned to the crowd and held out their hands to give him a grand entrance. “ _Doo-doo-doo-doooo!_ ” They fanfared for the Colonel as the crowd warily clapped. That applause wasn’t enough for the Jester, and they repeated their fanfare with a note of urgency before the crowd began cheering for the Colonel.

Perfect. The Colonel did not look amused, but he couldn’t show it. He gave a formal bow to the crowd, while the Jester clapped too and saluted with the Kimlasc- no wait, the Malkuth puppet. They pranced around like a soldier, squeaking in one-two steps, until they came back to the Colonel and grinned. They hoped that they weren’t imagining the wariness that crossed his expression, quick as a flash and melted into cautiousness as he turned to them. “I believe we have an overdue conversation,” he informed them.

“ _Szhoo..?_ ” The Jester tipped their head, and then held up a finger. “ _Hoo!_ ” They remembered. Clearly, he meant the act. Because they were in the _middle_ of a performance, thank you _very_ much. They grinned, and got in a boxing form, complete with puppet hands.

The Colonel gave them a withering look with a raised eyebrow. “I am on duty, I’m afraid.”

The Jester pouted visibly. “ _Pew…._ ” they whined, gesturing to the waiting crowd. It was for _them_. Two more chirps and they held out the arm with the Kimlasca soldier on the end. The Malkuth puppet came rushing forward and chopped the top of Feste’s arm with a loud squeak. Feste gave a shrill squeal and fell backwards, flailing as if that arm had been chopped off. The crowd gave amused mumbles as they simply somersaulted backwards to get to a standing position again.

“ _Get it?_ ” cried out the Malkuth Puppet in his little voice. It was a common game, after all.

“ _Fight me!_ ” screeched the Kimlasca one, who had to be held back by the Malkuth Puppet, with Feste looking horrified that he would say such a thing!

The Colonel gave a long suffering sigh. “Must it end in violence?”

Feste fanned themself, whistling. Oh, what a _gentleman_. But then they got back into position, grinning. 

They weren’t expecting it, but the Colonel complied. His arm darted to their side like a snake when they weren’t looking, and they were _nearly_ actually caught! Bravo, bravo! Feste squealed in joy and pulled both arms backwards to avoid losing an arm. They retaliated by spinning around to try and reach his far arm. 

The game was quicker than most would see with children, and honestly, it became enthralling. The Colonel was, after all, a soldier. He knew his way around a fight, and even if it wasn’t a real fight, he certainly treated it like one. Feste was having a wonderful time dodging and weaving and failing to get a single hit in. Of course, they couldn’t allow the Colonel to lose on his home territory. That wouldn’t be good for morale.

After the show went on through a few impressive flips and spins, Feste lost the Kimlasca arm, comically falling to the ground and rolling over their head at least twice. A bit of tumbling always brought a few laughs from the children. They landed, sitting on the ground with their legs sprawled, pretending to be dizzy. For a moment, there was silence, and then,

“ _Doo-doo!!_ ” A champion! The Jester buzzed and held out their arms to fanfare the Colonel once again. The crowd clapped, having enjoyed their colorful match. As he stiffly bowed once again, unwilling to upset his countrymen, the Jester pulled themself standing - and spotted no less than five _real_ Malkuth soldiers standing around the periphery. Fun.

They began to clap the two puppets together with the crowd congratulating the Colonel and bowing to him in response. The Jester waved, and made a motion to blow him a kiss, but then found themself face to face with the Malkuth Puppet and froze into a deadpan nothingness. 

That was apparently the right joke for exactly one (1) guy. His laugh shot out above the crowd and didn’t stop, eventually spreading to those around him. Feste would take it. 

The Kimlasca Puppet ran up and made a show of scolding the Malkuth one for cheating on him, and the Jester squeaked urgently between the two to pull them apart. That got the kids laughing too. 

The Jester looked pleadingly at the crowd and called out two panicked farewell tweets before bowing. Almost seamlessly into the middle of the argument, the Jester rolled forward, flipped and flopped back to spring behind their box stage to hide. A second later, the Malkuth Puppet reached around front to grab their sign. “ _Buh-bye!_ ” he called, before there was silence. 

It was a good enough ending for the crowd, who began to pester the Colonel. They thanked him for keeping morale up, for communing with the common folk, and all sorts of things like that. He took it with grace, and Feste had time to clean up their act. Which they did, and then attempted to slink away while he spoke to another. Just to see if he would let them.

He didn’t. 

Feste was stopped by a Malkuth soldier, who stood in front of their path and made it clear that they would hold Feste there if pushed. They just grinned. Fine, they would stay and speak with the Very Important Colonel if he wished it.

Soon after, the Very Important Colonel himself came up to them, looking almost amused. “You seem to enjoy putting others on the spot,” he commented by way of greeting. Feste grinned at him impishly and chirped in affirmation.

The Colonel pushed up his glasses with a slight sigh. “It would be remarkably more simple to have a conversation if you were to actually _speak._ ” 

Feste chuckled and put a finger to their lips like when they had first met, and gave a little shush.

“So be it,” the Colonel murmured. He put his hands in his pockets and gave a neutral smile that seemed to put the soldiers that had crept ever closer on edge. “I would very much like to know why you ran from a social visit in Baticul _and_ Chesedonia.”

“ _Zuu?_ ” The Jester chirped and tipped their head. Feste had never seen this man in Baticul or Chesedonia.

“Of course, you weren’t there, were you?” the Colonel hummed dryly. “Then tell me, where did you head after our meeting in St. Binah?”

Feste nodded and reached into their bag of tricks for a map. They pointed to St. Binah, to Engeve, and then to Grand Chokmah, beeping with each stop.

“No detours?” the Colonel said calmly, almost forgetting to intone it into a question.

Feste shook their head. They whistled, dragging their finger _aaaaaaall_ the way to Baticul, with a skeptical look, showing the sheer _distance_ . From St. Binah, to Engeve, to _Baticul_ \-- on the other side of the world -- and then _aaaaaaall_ the way to Grand Chokmah? Ludicrous.

“Of course,” the Colonel sighed again. Feste nodded and shoved the map back into their bag of tricks. “Then I’ll be looking forward to your company as we return to Engeve,” he continued, eyebrows raising ever so slightly, an evil glint in his eyes.

Ah, there it was. _We?_ Feste questioned with a chirp and a tipped head. 

“I’m afraid I have need of your testimony during that time,” the Colonel explained calmly.

Cute, but no, they knew the Colonel only wanted them to confirm or deny the story. Given the subtle tensing in his back, Feste assumed that he was expecting them to run when caught in the lie.

Feste gave him their most innocent smile, and buzzed happily at the prospect, clapping their hands together and _nodding._ Whether that caught the Colonel off guard, they could not tell, but the soldiers around them began to look at each other urgently. They were suddenly going to Engeve now? What had happened?

The Colonel gave a returning smile that looked just about as devious as their own. “Come, then.”

Feste did, following the Colonel as he let the soldiers close in and begin leading the Jester toward the town exit. _That_ was when Feora ran. They slipped down to the soldier’s legs, and tripped several as they slunk past with a strong dash. The Colonel was clearly expecting this, and had turned around in moments to restrain the Jester.

But they were a speedy little devil. They were able to get into an alleyway and begin to sprint out of sight for only a moment. They heard the order from the Colonel to quarantine the block, and squeeze them out. How very sweet.

Feora the Fool would not be caught today. Once out of his line of sight by only a fraction of a second, they faded into the ever-comforting presence of their partner. Their mentor and guide, found anywhere the sun shone. They could not _see_ as one would normally call it, but they knew that a set of boots had run right past where they existed in only the smallest sense of the word. 

They could always get away. The First Fonon held their lifeblood, and so within it, they could rest. They slunk among the shadows, hopping from crate to crate, from building to wall to passing tourist, and to whispering trees, until their dark highway led them right to the shadowy hedges of the castle garden.

Feora felt no one nearby, and so said farewell to their friend and slid back into their own form. With just a little shake of their hands and feet to get reacquainted, they started for their room in the castle, feeling… well, rather jolly, in fact.

That poor, poor man. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was like hey lets do a great thing chronologically with everything in the game and all my other writing is jumping all over the place now. oops.


	8. In Which I Finally Use Jade's Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AHAHAHAHA i was like yes lets be creative and write from a stranger's perspective so finally we get a name to the Very Important Colonel. Though Feora will never let that go because they're petty.

“Feora!”

The call burst through their room as the door opened, and Feora jumped in shock. “Mnuh?” they eloquently cried out in response to the sudden invasion.

Which was just as well, because Peony practically shrieked when they turned to him. “By Yulia! Warn me next time you look like that!”

Feora laughed, putting a hand on their chest. They hadn’t had the time yet to change out of their performance gear, and the makeup still held strong to their face. “Maybe knock, and I’ll have time to,” they told him.

“Oh. Right. But I have to tell you! Jade’s back!” Peony was as gleeful as a kid with a lollipop bigger than his head.

“Jade… your peace emissary who died in Akzeriuth?” Feora frowned, questioning.

Peony nodded. “I knew he wouldn’t let something like that get him.”

Something unprecedented besides the island of Hod.. would not kill this man. Peony had far too much optimism. “How do you know? What happened?”

“He just finished giving us his report! He and the whole peace team survived,” Peony said. Though he looked serious for just a moment. “They were the only ones. Jade says there’s important things that we need to discuss with the whole group.”

“The whole group? _We?_ ” Feora repeated.

Peony nodded. “You’re the one who has the firsthand report of the state of the Rugnica Plains. I need you to deliver that to them.”

“Jade, and the Fon Master and his Guardian?” Feora clarified. “Those were who you sent on the mission, right?”

“They’ve picked up an ambassador and the princess from Baticul,” Peony said. “Princess Natalia Luzu Kimlasca Lanvaldear, and the ambassador… I believe Jade said it was Luke fon Fabre, son of the Duke himself.”

“Luke?” Feora repeated before biting down on an awful, awful smirk.

Peony nodded and looked like he was going to say something before frowning at them like they were plotting something. Which, to be fair, is usually what that look meant. But in this case.. “...What is it?”

“I think… I’m going to have a lot of fun meeting this Jade of yours,” Feora said in a chirp that only meant bad things.

“Why..?” Peony asked warily.

“I’m quite sure that if he is who I think he is, he will be rather displeased with me,” Feora said loftily, not looking at all upset by the prospect. They stood and grinned. “When are we meeting them?”

“Tomorrow,” Peony answered, and then frowned. “What did you _do?_ ”

Feora waved a hand. “Nothing I haven’t already told you,” they said gently. “He just won’t like that I slipped away from him.” Three times. “Now, I’m gonna take a shower to get ready for our grand meeting. Anything else I can do to help?”

Peony looked amused. “Afterwards, you have to tell me what happened so we can piss him off even more.”

“Your _majesty_ ,” Feora gasped in mock horror. “...Sounds like a plan.”

Peony chuckled at that, but called Feora back when they turned to go for that shower. “Wait, Feora, one more thing,” he said, this time his tone was far more serious.

They turned back with a raised eyebrow, and their makeup forcing a smile across their curious look. “Yeah?”

“There’s an important… thing in the report,” he grimaced and looked over his shoulder like he was waiting for Victoria to pop out any second. “The Score.. Luke fon Fabre was not supposed to survive this.”

Feora felt like the world reeled, but they just stood there, staring at the emperor. “The Luke fon Fabre who is coming here tomorrow… was pronounced dead?”

“According to the Score.”

“Wait. Wait, wait, wait.” Feora turned around again, completely forgetting about the smile painted on their face. “Let me just. Get this straight. You’re saying that the Score was _wrong?_ ”

Peony took a moment, but he nodded. “Without a doubt. There was a mistake in the Score.”

Feora paused, staring. That.. it changed everything. What did it mean? They had thought there was no choice but to be here, because of that fonstone they had found in their travels but… the Score was _wrong?_ Then… every fonstone they had was _worthless_. Feora looked back to Peony. “You have to tell the Council.” 

“It will give them reason to doubt you again,” Peony retorted. “And we can’t know what this will do.”

"Right," they said in a low tone. "But, I mean, it's not like they weren't already unhappy about it. I can deal with it."

"As long as you're sure," Peony said.

"This is more important," Feora said firmly. "Tell the Council, and I’ll talk to your peace mission tomorrow before they come to interrogate me again. I'll be fine."

* * *

Feora _loved_ this. It was like…poetic justice. Fate. A really, really nice present on their birthday. It felt like they had _won_ . They didn’t really know _what_ they had won but they _had_ and both they and the Very Important Colonel would know it. Feora couldn’t stop fidgeting in their excitement for this meeting.

Though, they had reminded themself of another important aspect: If the Fon Master was in attendance then they had some severe apologies to make. They weren’t entirely sure how they were going to make them, but they would do it. They were just glad to hear that the boy was alright after it all.

And it’s not like they didn’t deserve some sort of repayment for letting him be taken away. They may be here in the palace now, but the Council would soon be finding any reason to not believe them or to cling to the Score instead. What was one more black mark on the record? They only hoped the Fon Master was willing to listen.

The most exciting thing, by far, was meeting Jade Curtiss. Jade the _fucking_ Necromancer, who Feora had personally embarrassed three times. Oh, they hoped that he would be just as amusing as he had been each of those times.

They stood on the right side of the throne, by the fonist they always had on hand to offer readings. Opposite them stood the advisors, who seemed either amused or horrified by their grin when Feora waved to them cheerily. That helped them know who to ask for help later.

A few minor announcements, and a group was led in. A larger group than Feora was expecting, to be honest, by at least one more. 

Oh, but it was _perfect_ . The Very Important Jade Curtiss scanned the room, and lost every single _trace_ of emotion the second he saw Feora. Every encounter before had held at least a hint of amusement, now there was none. That was how Feora knew they had gotten to him. This time was different, and that was so _good._

The meeting was formal, and as scripted as any conversation with Peony went. Feora got to learn of the full situation that had broken the Score, and learn about Luke.. this Not Asch the Bloody, who was apparently not a twin, but a _replica_. He seemed a little less petulant than their unknown meeting in Chesedonia.

Peony thanked them for their report at the end, and Feora found themself impressed by how well he handled the actual seriousness of his position. He turned to them as he began to explain the situation as they knew it.

“To start, let me introduce someone to you,” Peony said, holding a hand up towards Feora. “This is Feora Atenas Malkuth the Second, my sister.” 

The room went silent as the group turned to look at them, save Colonel Jade Curtiss, who seemed to show not a single difference in his expression save for a slight stiffening of his posture. Feora didn’t know him well enough to know what it meant, so they ignored it and waved to the rest of the group with a grin. “Hello.”

There was silence for a moment, before one of the members that Feora hadn’t been warned of stepped forward. He was a blonde man, and he seemed to be one of the group who spoke from the heart. Luke had been like that too, but this man seemed to know more than the other. “Excuse me, your majesty,” he said, stepping forward. “Maybe I’m remembering history class wrong, but..”

“I understand, Guy,” Peony said with a grin. “But through the grace of the Score, Feora survived.”

“Survived?” Luke questioned from behind the man named Guy.

“The last Emperor’s heirs were all killed,” a young girl standing by the Fon Master murmured to him, frowning. That must be his guardian.

“All except me,” Peony confirmed. “My father sent me away upon learning that the Score predicted me as the next Emperor.” He looked to Feora next, and they nodded slightly, turning to the group.

“I managed to escape with my life, but barely,” Feora said. “I honestly did everything I could to avoid coming back here but… well, gotta love the Score. And war.” Did Feora imagine a huff from Jade the Necromancer?

Peony grinned. “And I am glad for it. Feora has news from St. Binah.”

Feora nodded again. “The Rugnica Plains are beginning to fall,” they said, letting their expression turn as serious as Peony’s could. “We don’t know if it’s expected, but it seems that losing Akzeriuth has weakened the land around it as well. St. Binah is going to fall.”

“The Score didn’t mention St. Binah..” the other woman that Feora did not know told the others. They all looked grim as Feora continued.

“It’s not only the land around St. Binah. The plains themselves are beginning to crack, but the fighting has gotten too violent for anyone to issue a retreat to safety for either side.”

“You mean all those soldiers are gonna die?” Luke questioned, looking horrified.

“Because of the threat from Kimlasca we cannot send soldiers to aid an evacuation of St. Binah either,” Peony told them grimly. Feora grimaced, but Luke wasn’t done.

“Then we’ll go instead,” he told the Emperor, earning a wonderful amount of surprise from all sides except one. “It’s my fault this is happening anyway. I’ll go and evacuate the town.”

Peony grinned, which honestly surprised Feora for a moment because they didn’t know where this meeting was going, but apparently he had been hoping for this. “I cannot turn down a heartfelt offer,” he said. “Let me assist you as best I can by sending Feora in my place.”

The advisors, Victoria -- who had just entered the room -- Feora, and even Jade Curtiss all coughed in various degrees of shock and horror. 

“Your Majesty! You cannot expect to put the princess in such danger!”

“Nor to put such a mission at risk!” 

Peony waved a hand to silence them, and looked to Feora. “It’s the least I can do. Feora is accustomed to life on the road, and I’m sure her firsthand knowledge will help you.”

Feora stared back, and they realized slowly how this would solve their problems. The Council could not fear an assassination attempt from them if they were not even in the city. They could not refute their trustworthiness if they sacrificed so much for the nation. It was elegant, really. And.. they would be free. They could _leave_ . _Finally._

But Jade Curtiss coughed next. “Your Majesty, I can understand your gesture, but would it not be prudent to keep such a…” he glanced at Feora for the second time since entering, and Feora could practically hear him say _“suspicious”_ “figure under watch in the capital?” Feora couldn’t help but smile, knowing that as reasonable as his request was -- Peony was _stubborn._ Surely, his best friend Jade would know this.

“It would be _prudent_ to save our citizens,” Peony retorted. “Feora will go with you to lend assistance.”

“As far as I know, _Feste_ the Entertainer, is not--” Jade was beginning to argue, but Feora was louder. Or at least they were about the third time they spoke up.

“Wait. It’s not up to you,” they said firmly. Peony looked in surprise at them, not expecting a protest from _them._ But that wasn’t Feora was aiming at. They turned and looked at a small boy with a shock of green hair. He almost looked surprised at being addressed.

Feora stepped forward and knelt before the Fon Master, even as his Guardian stepped in front of him suspiciously. “Fon Master, I have to apologize to you.”

Fon Master Ion looked at them curiously, but there was no sign of resentment. “I was… unsure if it was truly you in that car.”

Feora nodded and bowed their head. “It was. I have no excuse for my cowardice that day.”

“Ion?” Anise frowned, looking at him. The Fon Master gave a reassuring smile. “It’s alright, Anise. I don’t think she wants to hurt us.”

“I don’t,” Feora agreed, looking to them again. “But I do want your permission to join you, and to make up for what my family did.”

Anise, the Guardian, looked thoroughly confused, and the Fon Master tipped his head. “Your family?” He glanced to Peony, who probably looked just as confused.

“The family I found after escaping,” Feora answered quietly. “They have… fallen away from what I knew.”

“I see..” the young boy looked them over, and Anise looked exasperated at not knowing what the hell either of them were talking about.

“So.. Fon Master Ion, I would like to join you in your mission to St. Binah, and assist you afterwards, if you will let me,” Feora requested formally, looking him in the eye.

Fon Master Ion looked at them for a moment before smiling what was probably the sweetest smile they had ever seen. “Alright. Thank you.”

Feora grinned at him. “Thank _you,_ Fon Master,” they said with genuine relief. “I won’t let you down.”

Peony, having no idea what had just happened, clapped his hands decisively with a large grin. “Good! Then it’s decided. Jade, come see me after I convene the Council.”

Feora turned just in time to see Jade the Necromancer grimace. Oh, this was going to be a fun trip. But in the meantime, the advisors flocked to Peony to berate him for his decisions, and the guests, Feora’s new teammates, filed in to greet them. Teammates… What a strange concept after so long.

* * *

“Peony, you know as well as I how impossible this is,” Jade was saying, visibly irritated to Peony’s highly trained eye.

“Jade,” Peony retorted in the same tone of voice, “you haven’t looked at that picture every morning over your daily oatmeal.” The Colonel was holding, had been forced to hold, a family portrait from before the massacre. “I see her every morning along with the rest of them, and _that’s her._ I knew the second she walked into the room.”

“And I have also seen this person as a drunken man in Chesedonia, consorting with people who appear to be thieves,” Jade said in a tone as dry as the desert itself. 

“She said you’d be mad about that.”

Jade took a slow breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. “You will be too, when you wake up with a knife in your back.”

“Well, then you should have no problem taking that knife for me?” Peony asked with a devilish smirk that had always infuriated Jade. “After all, you have to do _something_ to make up for getting that fon slot seal, less-cute Jade.”

“It is the duty of any soldier of Malkuth to protect you, _Your Majesty_ . If nothing else, to protect you from anyone looking to kill you other than _myself._ ”

Peony shrieked and scurried away behind his couch, still grinning like the child he was. “Well, now you have a different royal to torture!” he protested. “And if she’s with you, then there’s no way she can hurt me, so it’s a win-win!”

“I have never assumed responsibility for your rappigs, and I will not babysit a fool for you either,” Jade said firmly.

“Well, someone’s gonna have to, cause she’s coming with you,” Peony said just as firmly. “The Council needs a second judge of character, and you are going to provide that.”

“Ah, good, I will go inform the Council to have Feste the Entertainer imprisoned, then,” Jade said cheerily, turning to leave.

“Jaaade! You’re awful!” Peony whined. “You can’t be a second judge of character without even _talking_ to her!”

“I _have_ spoken to her,” Jade said calmly. “Three times, in fact, and each one with a new lie.”

“Ugh,” Peony huffed and rolled over the back of the couch to fall onto it. “I don’t care. She’s got the strength to help you out, and I bet she could follow you anyway. You’re stuck with us.”

Jade sighed again, ready to continue the argument, but Peony firmly interrupted him. “Go get the others. I forgot to talk to Guy about his title. And I need to make sure that you’re not unforgivably rude -- _again_ \-- to my sister.”

Just to spite him, Jade reminded Peony that he still had _some_ fonic abilities by dumping a water spell right over Peony’s head as he left the room.


	9. Feora Ruins My Plan For This Chapter and Sings to Strangers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I sat down to write this as the "hey look at this unbelievable backstory" chapter, but then... Feora was a dick. And I got mad because I was like NO Feora ANSWER his QUESTIONS. But Feora does as they please.
> 
> Takes place after St. Binah falls.

They watched the land crumble. It was painfully slow, and then painfully fast all at the same time. Each crack sent a jolt of fear that Feora was quite certain could be felt across each of the evacuees onboard the Albiore. The city fell, and then it fell faster and faster until it cracked against the thick mud. A wave of the disgusting half-liquid roiled in response, lapping the green grass on the edges with its disgusting muck.

So this was the Qliphoth. 

Nothing but miasma and mud, already seeking to claim that had fallen to it. 

“What’s gonna happen to the city?” Anise murmured.

The group and the Grand Marshall of St. Binah had climbed up to the cockpit to look at the scene as they did. It was gruesome, but wholly less gruesome than it would have been if the loading bay weren’t full of the entire town’s population. 

They were safe. That was the important part. A home can be rebuilt.

“It will float for a while, and then sink into the miasma,” Tear said. The silence after that was potent as the Grand Marshall paled, looking over the edge of the window. Feora wouldn’t break it here. It would do no good.

“Isn’t there something we can do?” Luke finally spoke up. The answer seemed to be no, and he didn’t like that. His voice grew frantic and fearful, shouting about what to do to make things right. Well, he had destroyed Akzeriuth, so Feora could imagine this meant a lot to him.

They were going to offer something before Jade cut Luke off with a sharp tone. One which shut the boy up immediately, and the others for good measure. They all looked a bit shocked. “Rushing around with no plan will not help anything,” the man explained in a normal tone, but Luke still looked hurt. No one seemed to know what to say next.

Well, that was Feora’s turn. They turned back to the ladder where the citizens were mourning the loss of their city below.

“Feora?” Fon Master Ion looked surprised as they moved without saying anything.

Feora gave him their best grin. “We can help them, right?” they said, glancing at Luke before climbing onto the first rung of the ladder. “That’s what I do. Fools don't plan well anyway.”

The Fon Master looked curious for a moment, but nodded once. Feora gave a wave and descended to the hold. It was even darker there, with only little fonstones on the walls to light the way. It was cramped with so many people on board, and it was getting humid from all the sweat and tears. It was miserable for everyone, but soon they would find a place to land and let the people rest.

Feora moved to the center of the room and sat on the floor. From their bag of tricks came a small stringed instrument, but with the small space of the hold, it would do. 

They tuned the instrument, drawing the gaze of the people near them. Children started to come forward curiously, and tearful eyes turned to them. Feora smiled. They smiled and smiled and smiled to each and every one of them until the instrument was ready.

They began to sing.

They sang the anthem of Malkuth, they sang songs of St. Binah. They sang hopeful songs that had stuck with Auldrant since the Dawn Age, and encouraged the children who had sat in front of them to join in.

It took a little while, but eventually the hold resonated with the sound of a whole town singing to honor their loss, and what they had been able to save. Feora smiled the whole time, so that the townsfolk could cry. 

Luke joined them in the hold, looking in awe at what was happening. Feora offered a spot next to them, while they began the next verse. They knew he would not know the words to the song, but he deserved to see what he had done today. These people were here because of him.

Feora couldn’t speak to the boy until the songs ended, but they filled the silence afterwards with gentle strumming. Soft melodies to soothe the hearts of St. Binah. “Thanks for coming, Luke,” they said quietly.

“What? I- Uh.. yeah..” he stammered a response. Apparently he wasn’t used to being thanked.

Feora smiled at him. “Hey, I’ve got some advice for you, if you want to hear the opinion of a clown.”

“But you’re Peony’s-”

“Nah,” Feora interrupted him, shaking their head. “I’m the best performer in the world, but that’s it. And I’m also about the same age as Jade.”

“Huh?” Luke had no idea how that was related.

“So if you ever need an adult who’s not as stuffy? I’m your guy,” they told him with a little wink. “You did amazing today, even if it doesn’t feel like it.”

“But.. we didn’t save the city,” Luke mumbled, looking down.

“Yeah, you did,” Feora answered. “They’re right here. And it’s not completely too late for the buildings, right?”

“You know what to do next?”

“Nope, but I bet we’ll find something. Or they will.” Feora lifted their chin up to the cockpit. “You have good friends.”

Luke grimaced and shuffled. He sighed and put his chin in his hands. “I don’t think I’m their friend anymore.. Not after what I did.”

“Bullshit,” Feora said blatantly, making the younger boy look at them in horror. They grinned. “They care about you. Don’t forget it, or you might take it for granted.”

“I.. I guess.. Sorry,” Luke mumbled.

Feora just smiled again. “Don’t be. Just remember to keep going.”

“Uh-huh..” The boy nodded, and watched the people across from him thoughtfully. Feora let him think in the relative silence of small songs. 

* * *

And now it was the second time within one week that Feora was doing this.

Singing for the displaced people of an entire town, and it wasn’t St. Binah again. No, now they had to evacuate all of Engeve through a battlefield. Lovely.

It was night now. Cool and crisp, even as they slowly approached Chesedonia. Feora didn’t have the pleasant company they had had before, however. Luke had been convinced that the most reasonable thing to do to stop the fighting was prove he was alive, so he had gone with Princess Natalia. 

Here, Feora had a Very Important Colonel looming at the edges of the makeshift campsite while they sang for the people of Engeve. 

He had been surprisingly quiet about his distrust of Feora, other than the occasional snide comments. However, he always seemed to be _there_. Feora could feel his presence at almost any given time, watching them. Well, they hoped he was enjoying the show, if nothing else. 

Still, it was unusual of him to approach Feora, which is what happened this night. He was silent for only a few moments before he spoke.“You are not His Majesty’s sister."

Ah, there it was. Time for the real discussion. Feora shrugged. “No?”

“No. And it’s a rather weak argument, simply saying ‘I escaped’ when no one else did,” Jade commented. A smile that was brought up purely for show crossed his lips. “Really, it’s insulting, compared to the effort you put into your last disguises.”

Feora gave him a look with furrowed brows. “Yeah?”

“Very,” Jade confirmed. “If you’re to worm your way back into the palace, I’m going to be expecting a _believable_ story.”

Hah. “Nope,” Feora answered plainly. Nothing about this was believable, and honestly they loved it that way.

“You’re sticking with ‘I was fourteen with no combat experience but somehow got away from trained assassins’?

“Yep.” Feora strummed at the strings of their instrument with a small, thoughtful smile. They didn’t need to look at Jade to see his open-palmed shrug.

“Obstinacy is your downfall, then,” he sighed. “And here, I thought fools were supposed to adapt.”

“Yeah?” He halted his movements suddenly, and Feora couldn’t stop their smirk. Anything to get under his skin, and he seemed to be catching on. 

His voice had grown terse.. “Peony has tasked me with keeping an eye on you. I hope you know I won’t tolerate any _foolery_ when it comes to our missions.”

“Yep!” Feora chirped and plucked at a few notes. That obviously meant that _foolery_ was perfectly acceptable outside of missions. Feora would take advantage of that.

The sound of him sighing through his nose made Feora outright grin. “And you’re seeing how long you can keep me talking without responding.”

“Yep!”

The Colonel shook his head, hands in his pockets and expression unreadable. “You do a poor job of gaining trust. You had best work harder at it, before I have to take matters into my own hands.”

“Yep!”

Feora was pretty sure he held his breath as he walked away so they wouldn’t hear his frustration. They had definitely frustrated him. It was marvellous.

* * *

Only a few minutes later came another guest. This time, Not-Yet-Count Guy sat on a rock near but not too near Feora. “Hey,” he said simply.

That was much more polite than a certain Very Important Colonel. “Hey,” Feora answered with a smile. “Got a song request?”

“Nah,” Guy waved a lazy hand. “Don’t know that much about songs. Got a question, though.”

“Shoot,” Feora said while they continued to play just as lazily. Soon, they would let the instrument rest with the villagers, but everyone was still moving too anxiously to sleep.

“What’d you do to get under Jade’s skin like that?”

Feora raised an eyebrow at him like they had no idea what he was talking about. “Like what?”

“Like… _that_ ,” Guy said, vaguely yet emphatically at the same time. Feora was impressed by that. 

“Hm.. well, I did meet him twice before this, while I was performing,” they answered. Well, four times but they weren’t at the point of admitting that just yet. “Made him get on stage. I think he's jealous that I'm funnier than him.”

Guy seemed to choke on air. “Th-That’s.. Somehow I don’t think that’s what it is.”

“I dunno. I don’t think he likes Feste,” Feora sighed with a few somber notes to follow.

“Is.. Feste different from you?” Guy asked warily.

Feora pondered for a moment, before humming, “Only when it suits me.”

“When’s that?”

See, Feora liked Guy. He asked the questions he wanted to know the answers to, instead of trying to dance around it and be clever. “When it’s more fun, I guess,” they answered, shrugging. “When I’m performing as Feste, I usually don’t speak. It’s part of the character. He didn’t like that I kept it up when he wanted answers.”

“Answers?” Guy looked confused. “He didn’t know who you were until we all met, right?”

Feora nodded. “He’d gotten suspicious of where I’d been, though.”

“Huh..” Guy huffed and looked at the ground, frowning. “So why is he prowling around with that _look_ now?”

Feora grinned. “I still didn’t give him answers.”

Guy looked stricken. “Huh? Why not?”

“More fun!” Feora chirped, looking rather proud of themself.

Guy’s expression somehow didn’t move at all, and yet became pained. “O-Oh… right..”

Feora just chuckled at that. “Next time,” they promised. “I just couldn’t help myself. He made it so easy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here on I stop caring and editing as much because I'm writing what I want to instead of worrying about chronology. I love you. You.
> 
> Here, have a song rec that made me dream up this singing chapter. It also makes me think of Achilles and Patroclus having a date because im a nerd like that.
> 
> In the Singing by Harpeth Rising
> 
> “It was only then I realized there’s no victory in song, but in singing there is glory, there is might.”


	10. Finally, Feora's Fable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feora chats with the Dark Wings and tells a story! it's their backstory that nobody believes!! Wooo!!! Well.. at least part of it.

Next came Chesedonia. Chesedonia had closed its border as well, but took in the people of Engeve readily. Feora didn’t know whether to count themself as incredibly lucky, or incredibly unlucky to run into their family in Chesedonia. They were lucky because they had a _lot_ to tell them, and they would have been able to get the group through for free… if not for the unlucky part of “hey, my family is the Dark Wings so if you ever needed a reason to not trust me, here it is”, and they would probably keep that part hidden. 

Also lucky in that their family was so good at keeping up appearances. They barely batted an eyelash when Feora was visible behind the group of people trying to force their way through. Feora was grateful, and showed it in a grimace when the Colonel blackmailed them to get through. Though, dirty tactics deserve dirty responses they supposed. Nonetheless, they were able to get through the border as much as needed - and Feora knew where to talk with their family.

The group decided to rest in the inn before their next move. Everything had changed in the course of a few minutes -- they all needed time to recuperate. Suddenly, they had Grand Maestro Mohs accusing Natalia of being a fraud. Ion had left _with_ Mohs, _and_ had fired Anise. Like. What.

So, while everyone was resting, Feora crept out to go see their family for a brief spell. They were still in the bar, smuggling people in for extra cash. Feora couldn’t really fault that practice. It was one they might even have joined in on, under other circumstances.

“Feora!” York was the one to call to them once they were clearly alone. 

Feora felt relief at his calm tone. They hurried over, grinning. “Hey g-”

“What in the _hell_ is going on?” Noir demanded, shoving past him. “Where’s your disguise? Why are you following _Jade the Necromancer?_ ”

Feora pursed their lips and raised an eyebrow. “To throw you off?”

Urushi gave a huff of a laugh. “Twit.”

Feora grinned, and Noir scowled. “What’s going on?”

“Hell if I know,” they answered honestly. “Everything’s gone topsy turvy, and I can’t stay for long. I don’t think they’d still trust me if they knew about you guys.”

“It’s what you get for siding with morally upstanding folk,” York said loftily.

Feora stook out their tongue. “Whatever. I’ve got a favor. Kinda.”

“A favor?” Urushi looked wary at the thought. “Yer gonna get us wrapped up in all yer nonsense.”

“It’s- I swear, it’s important. A-And it should get you guys more pay,” Feora said quickly.

“No promises,” Noir warned them.

Feora nodded. “Asch the Bloody. Find him again, and get him to hire you,” they said quietly. “He needs a team, and he sure as hell isn’t joining up with ours.”

“Asch? I thought you didn’t like us taking jobs with him,” York said.

“I know. It’s all different now,” Feora sighed. “Just.. think about it. I bet he pays better than this.”

“He does,” Noir agreed, looking wearily at her glass. “I’m not getting nearly my fill here.”

Feora grinned at her and ran forward to give her a big ol’ hug. She yelped, and then the other two did as Feora came for them too. “I gotta dash. See you later.”

“Get outta here,” Urushi grumbled, shooing them with his hands. They chuckled and did so, wandering through some stalls before heading back to the inn. They would have brought some fruit, but everything had become far too expensive for simple shopping.

Instead, they just sighed, stretched, and looked around the inn lobby. Princess Natalia was there, looking forlornly at an empty glass. She practically radiated nervousness. Well, time for Feora to go to work, then, they supposed.

They came over and sat across from her. “You alright?”

Natalia burst out of her stupor with a jump and a shake of her head. “What? Oh, yes. I’m fine.”

“You’re strong,” Feora said, raising their eyebrows. “I wouldn’t be alright after hearing what that bastard had to say.”

“It… cannot be true anyway,” Natalia said, though her doubt showed in her tightly knit brows.

“It shouldn’t matter if it is, though,” Feora reminded her. “Like, technically I’m a royal but we all know that you’re more leaderly than anyone here.”

“Mohs is looking to discredit my leadership as well as my heritage, it seems,” Natalia murmured, looking down at her glass again.

“He can’t change what you’ve done. Everyone knows you help Baticul just as much as His Majesty. Your father.”

“Father…” Natalia murmured and seemed to grow even more worried.

Feora let her think a moment, and then said, “That’s what’s really scaring you, huh?”

Natalia clenched her fists. “I could not bear it if..”

“He’s your dad, Natalia,” Feora said when she trailed off. “You know him better than anyone else does. He’s always gonna be your dad, regardless of.. Bloodline or whatever.”

Natalia swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded, trying to bring herself to believe it. “Yes.. Thank you,” she said quietly. 

“Anything I can do for you?” Feora asked, glancing at her from the side.

She paused a moment, and then shook her head. “I believe I simply need rest at this point.”

“Good plan,” Feora said, nodding. “Sleep well. Seeya tomorrow.”

“Yes.. goodnight,” Natalia smiled weakly to them and stood. She headed upstairs to the rooms they had rented, and was soon gone.

Feora stayed where they were, to just rest and think things through. It wasn’t long before company came in the form of Jade Curtiss, who had apparently been exploring the town as well. Feora figured now was as good a time as any to actually talk, so they gave a little wave and smile as he came in.

He almost looked amused before he steeled himself and came over. “I take it that you’ve broken your vow of silence?”

Feora groaned, and leaned on their elbow. “You can’t just _say_ things like that. Then it makes me want to keep it up even longer.”

Jade took that as a yes and sat down in the seat Natalia had been in. “I would say that that would be a foolish decision, though I suppose that’s redundant.

Feora grinned proudly. “A fool is all I’ve ever been,” they said cheerily. “So, I think you were looking to interrogate me?”

Jade gave them an appraising glance. “Maybe I’ve given up,” he said loftily. “You’re stuck with my negative report to the Council, Feste.”

Feora gave an overly dramatic gasp. “No..! What have I done?”

He gave a huff and adjusted his glasses. Before the conversation could continue, though, the sound of a door upstairs had them both pause. A few seconds later, Anise came down the stairs.

“Anise, you’ll age faster if you don’t get sleep when you’re young,” Jade greeted her.

“Colonel!” Anise apparently hadn’t expected anyone. “Oh.. and Feora.”

Feora smirked and waved at the obvious distaste in Anise’s tone. “Don’t listen to him. I’ve stayed up for nights on end, and I’m fine,” they said, pulling up another chair. “You can help the Colonel squeeze my deep, dark backstory from me.”

Anise frowned and grumbled something under her breath, but joined them. “What are you talking about?”

Jade leaned back in his chair and raised his eyebrows. “I think Feste made that rather clear,” he said calmly.

Anise looked at both of them skeptically and then sighed heavily. “I don’t know why I bother.”

“So jaded already,” Jade tsked in response, earning an obnoxious laugh and some finger guns from Feora, and a glare from Anise.

Feora leaned back, stretching. “Well, I can promise you that my history is just as exciting as it was before.”

“Shall we start from the top, then?” Jade asked, adjusting his glasses and looking at them again. “You can’t be His Majesty’s sister.”

“But I am, so. Uh. Next question?”

Anise cut in. “How, then? I mean, we all get the escaped thing but nobody else did, and we would have heard if someone got away. It’d be a legend by now.”

“There we go!” Feora gestured to Anise while looking at Jade. “She knows how to ask questions.” But then they paused, and looked back to her while Jade shrugged loftily. “And you’re really looking for an answer?” 

“Well, duh,” Anise answered, scowling.

Feora sighed, only a _bit_ melodramatically this time. “I guess I'm the only one who hesitates before bringing up others traumatic pasts. Fine, fine. It’s not anything special though, I promise.”

“Go on,” Jade offered, holding out a hand before crossing his arms again.

“Well, it turns out that I was lucky and.. Agatha was not,” Feora --no, _Feste_ \-- said, keeping their tone light to try and fight off the deep seated instinct of _“don’t you dare say a damn thing about this not one more word.”_ They looked at the table, and figured the best way to do this was as a performer should. “Agatha was a normal girl. She was perfectly lovely, long blonde hair and a face that put people at ease. She grew up outside of the palace, while her parents worked for the Emperor and his lovers.”

“Does _Agatha_ happen to be the same age as you?” Jade questioned blandly.

“Shhh! You can’t spoil the story!” Feste protested vehemently. “It’s _my_ story, not yours. Agatha was _almost_ my age, fine, but no more interruptions!” He held up his hands in mock defeat. Feste nodded firmly. “Right. So. One day, Agatha’s mother had caught one of the Emperor’s lovers _deep_ in a scandal with one of his advisors. A very _personal_ scandal, that was supposed to end with the advisor as the Emperor’s new right-hand-man, and a few pockets lighter than they should be. Well, the Emperor was so grateful to Agatha’s mother that he offered her a reward.

“Agatha’s mother wanted nothing for herself, but requested aid for her daughter. She wanted to know that Agatha would have a better life than she had had, as something more than a mere servant. The Emperor agreed, and told her to bring Agatha to the palace tomorrow, where he would then reveal his reward. Agatha’s parents spent all night helping Agatha dress up properly for her trip to the palace. By the time the next day came, Agatha looked fit to be a noblewoman.”

A moment of clarity seemed to cross the Colonel’s expression, but before he could move to speak, Feste held up a warning finger. “ _The next day.._ ” they began emphatically, with no room for interruption. “...The family came to the palace with Agatha. The Emperor had invited another guest to join them -- a lovely man from the Besseau family. The Emperor declared that the two would be wed. Agatha would be given the right to become a true noblewoman, and live the rest of her life in luxury, if she would take this man as her husband.

“She agreed, and went with the advisors and her new fiancee to make it official. As they walked down the hallways, they were met with a horrifying scream. Shouts. Another scream, and a-another,” Feora hated that they stammered. They hated it and closed their eyes, forcing their expression to smooth out. It was a performance. Feste was simply telling a story. “The enemies of the Emperor had sent their people. The guards were nowhere to be seen, and one by one, the people in the palace were being killed.

“A shout rang through the palace: ‘The princess! The last one is in here!’” Feste’s voice intoned into a new one for the shout. “But the princess was not. It was only Agatha. Before an explanation could leave her lips.. Agatha was sliced down by a pair of daggers. Her fiance and the advisors came next. The assassins shouted cries of victory, while all the while the Emperor’s daughter had simply managed to hide in the gardens just outside the room.”

“Seriously?” Anise looked frustrated. “All that? And _that’s it?_ ” 

Feste forced a smile. “I told you it wasn’t anything special. The princess ran away.”

Jade took in a sigh. “Well, I give you a few points for adding some flair to it,” he said. “It’s still a lovely story that cannot be proven nor disproven. The entire palace staff was murdered that day as well. There were no survivors.”

“Except the princess that nobody knew about,” Feste butt in wisely.

“Clearly,” Jade responded. “So how do you then justify the transition from princess to clown?”

Feste felt that this was far better territory to be in. One that Feora could share if needed. “St. Binah. Everything important seems to happen there for me,” they answered, stretching a little to loosen their tensed shoulders. “The Black Dream circus troupe had just performed for the city. You remember them, yeah?” they glanced at Jade, who had no choice but to admit the truth. “Right. Well, starving 14 year old who wants to hide who they are? Perfect for the troupe. They took me in, and I’ve lived on the road ever since.”

“Why not go back when Peony became the Emperor?” Anise demanded. “Way better than living poorly.”

Feora shrugged. “I’m not so sure. I never really was looking forward to being forced into a political marriage anyway. It’s boring being a noble.”

Anise was staring at Feora like they had sprouted horns, which made Feora grin.

“So then your sudden change of heart?” Jade prompted.

“The Score,” Feora sighed with a show of lament. “Which I apparently could have ignored this whole time, thanks to you all.”

“What Score?” Anise asked. “I don’t remember anything like this.”

“Peony has the stone now,” Feora said. “I found it about.. five years ago? Tiny little thing, which said I was definitely the best performer in the whole world. And also told me I had to go back this year. I’d been dreading it ever since.”

“You’re weird,” Anise said plainly. “Why would you _ever_ give up being that rich?”

Feora chuckled. “More fun. I’m all about fun.”

Jade huffed and leaned on his elbow. “It’s clever, but unbelievable,” he said.

“I don’t believe it either,” Anise agreed, crossing her arms. 

Feora shrugged. “That’s fine. I’ll deal with it.”

Anise scowled. “Why should we let you keep coming with us if we don’t trust you?”

“Well, number one, you were told to - so Jade has to keep babysitting me.” He hid his expression with his glasses again at that. “Number two, I promised the Fon Master that I’d help you all.”

Anise faltered at being reminded of Ion. “Well, he’s not here now, so,” she tried to argue haughtily, but looked visibly upset.

Feora smiled, not maliciously like most of their others either. “He’ll be back soon, Anise. You know he only relieved you because he trusts you.”

Anise narrowed her eyes at Feora. “Whatever. I don’t trust someone who let him be kidnapped.” Jade looked rather fascinated at that.

Feora raised a finger. “See _that_ , that’s super fair. You shouldn’t trust me for that. I was dumb and confused. Though, in my defense, I probably would’ve been killed if I tried anything.”

“Letting Ion be kidnapped?” Jade questioned, Anise nodding afterwards.

“She was apparently there when Asch took him from Baticul,” Anise said. “Ion said that you were forced, but I don’t believe it.”

Feora smiled. “I don’t blame you, but I’ll make it up to him, and you, eventually.”

Anise huffed grumpily and kept glaring. Jade spoke up next, however. “Unfortunately, Feste is correct. I have to keep an eye on her until we return to Grand Chokmah and meet with the Council.” He stood and fixed them with a cold look. “I expect a more believable story before then.” Anise scooted out from her chair too, and nodded.

“Not gonna happen buddy,” Feora said, shrugging. “But g’night. See you tomorrow.”

Jade and Anise left. Feora stepped outside and spent several minutes practicing their juggling to ease their frayed nerves. Never again. They really, really hoped that they weren’t supposed to give an encore of that story.


	11. In Which Jade Pesters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jade keeps on interrogating feora, and ends up almost having enough of it. THOUGH we do also (finally) get to learn about Shadow more. My summoning lore and all that. I can't wait.
> 
> This takes place at the Inista Marsh after Ingobert is a butt to Natalia, and then in.. Sheridan after that. I'm jumping forward a lot.

“Careful, your mask is slipping,” came the all-too-pleased voice of Jade Curtiss in the middle of Feora’s Deep Thoughts.

They jumped and looked at him with their usual cheery curiosity. “Oh?”

“You were starting to look positively _murderous_ ,” Jade said, raising his eyebrows.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Feora answered dryly, their voice falling to a deadpan.

“Of course not,” Jade answered effortlessly. Feora just huffed and looked ahead of themself, to the rest of the group. They were meant to trust this group, weren’t they? Well, then they might as well share their thoughts.

“Ingobert is more of a fool than I am,” they said, voice low. “At least I recognize my own family.”

“I doubt Natalia would like to hear you slander her father, even now,” Jade pointed out.

“Yeah, and that’s why I haven’t said anything to her,” Feora answered, looking at him with a frown. “Doesn’t change that I hate him now.”

“More than you hate me?”

Feora laughed with no humor. “I don’t hate you, dumbass.”

“Foolish of you, really,” he said in response.

" _Booooo_. Only funny once," Feora told him. Jade huffed slightly in response, which they assumed was good. “But.. it’s true. Even if he goes back and accepts Natalia later.. That won’t change what he did. Natalia will always have that fear that he doesn’t actually see her as his daughter. That she’s an impostor, when she’s the best damn thing that happened to Baticul.”

“You know this from experience?” Jade questioned.

“Well, yeah, kinda,” Feora shrugged. “I perform there, talked with the townsfolk, and I’d spoken to her before she knew me.”

“Is that so? You lied directly to one of our own party?”

Feora rolled their eyes. “Awful of me. Cruel and unjust.”

“Very. I have a mind to inform Natalia right this second,” Jade agreed, tone light.

“Go ahead,” Feora said. “I’m sure it’ll help with the devastation she’s feeling. Definitely more important.” Jade’s expression fell to the neutral that meant they were right. He knew when to keep his mouth shut around the Princess. 

Feora kept up the silence for a moment before sighing. “She’s the real princess,” they said softly. “Anything I do will always be a sad performance of royalty. Bloodlines mean nothing.”

Jade raised his eyebrows and gave them a look that told them they had misstepped. “ _Nothing?_ ”

Feora returned his look without hesitation. “If a family won’t accept you as family, they’re not family,” they said, putting on an overly wise tone. “I have my family from the troupe, and Peony accepted me. He believed me when nobody else would. That’s the opposite of what Ingobert did, and why I can say he is, without a doubt, my brother.”

“Even if you aren’t _truly_ related,” Jade finished for them, sounding rather pleased with the outcome.

“But we are, so stuff it, Colonel,” Feora answered, following up the statement with a very mature sticking out of their tongue.

“You are really awful at this espionage thing,” Jade commented.

“You’re the one who-”

Feora cut off when the group halted, looking at Natalia as she froze. They let the sentence die as they hurried ahead to deal with more important matters. Natalia needed support far more than Jade needed to pat himself on the back. 

* * *

Feora had decided that Sheridan was now the best place in the world, mostly because it was where they were able to run into the Dark Wings again. This time, they could be _thanked_ by Feora’s group as well. At least, they should have been. Either way, Feora had it in mind to thank them a million times over once the others had retired. 

They had left town in the early evening, and it hadn’t taken long to find their family’s encampment. They stayed and celebrated and hugged their family for quite a while before deciding to head back. They always figured they could say they were out practicing if needed to.

Which became inconsequential as a Very Important Colonel was already at the entrance when they were returning right around dusk. Fun times.

“Jade!” Feora made sure to put on their best chipper tone as they waved at him.

He did not look nearly as pleased, and merely raised his eyebrows, his hands already resting in his pockets. “There’s no need to pretend here,” he said with a shrug and a smug little smile. “The others are still at the inn.”

Feora felt a little jolt of wariness at that. Was he really expecting them to just drop whatever act he thought they were putting on? “You’re really persistent. I swear, I’m not pretending.”

“Except for when you sneak off to talk to the Dark Wings.. Twice now, in fact,” he commented dryly.

Feora wasn’t mad that he had spotted them the first time too, and apparently had given them a chance. It was clever of him, really, and they weren’t mad about him being cautious. They weren’t mad at all.

Okay, maybe they were a little irked. But it was nothing he needed to know. “So?” they asked, their tone silky smooth. “You could’ve asked, you know.”

“Oh, is that so?” Jade sounded dangerously amused. “Something about our interactions with them made me think it was _implied_ that they are not trustworthy.”

“You think so, sure, but I know them better,” Feora said. “Can you interrogate me somewhere sitting down? It’s been a long day.”

“Feel free to sit,” Jade said with another little forced smile. “Without answers, you may be returning to your band of rogues tonight anyway. You’ve shown a great tendency towards slipping away.”

Feora grimaced and crossed their arms. “So you’re not letting me into town, now?”

“No, not with a mission of this importance,” Jade answered firmly. “Unless I have proof that _anything_ you’ve said to us is truthful.”

“I’ve told you the story at least five times now,” Feora sighed. “If I have to do it again, I expect audience participation.”

“Let’s move past that part of the story,” Jade said instead, his tone lilting like he had something particularly devious in mind. A trap, or a gotcha. Feora would have been looking forward to hearing it if they weren’t… honestly annoyed. 

“To what, the Black Dream again?” they asked.

“To Theor,” Jade corrected them. “To a fourteen year old successfully navigating a forest that adults to this day are wary of entering without a set path.”

Feora paused and raised an eyebrow, but then _groaned_ loudly. “Uuuuughh, but you’re gonna _hate_ that part…!” they whined. 

“Of course. Why else would you gloss over it?” Jade answered.

"So that you wouldn't ask questions about the unbelievable parts!"

“Try me. At least it’s not Agatha again.”

Feora sucked on their teeth, feeling a bit sick for his words. They didn’t joke about Agatha. “I was lucky,” they said, a bit defensively. “Just like the princess in the palace. It was luck, luck, luck. I’d be nowhere without Lady Luck.”

“And what _exactly_ did Lady Luck do for you?” Jade persisted.

“She sent me help,” Feora answered. “Introduced me to someone who made me who I am today.”

“All this build up to…?” 

“...Shadow,” Feora said, deflating a little. They continued as Jade’s expression jumped through disbelief, irritation, incredulity, and resignation all in one second. “Yeah, _that_ Shadow too. I told you you wouldn’t like it.”

“You expect me to believe that you just so _happened_ to accidentally meet the aggregate sentience of a set of fonons in the middle of _Theor Forest_ after miraculously being spared from the assassination of your family,” Jade asked.

“No, I told you, I don’t expect you to believe it at all,” Feora answered tersely. “Really now, Jade, keep up. You’re supposed to be a genius here.”

“ _No one_ has seen an aggregate sentience aside from in a laboratory,” Jade countered. “And much less has it been around long enough to _speak_ and become _friends_ with it.” 

“Yeah. I know,” Feora said. “The researchers need to be more open to how the world functions on its own. Theor Forest has a natural fon slot off the paths, and that’s where Shadow congregates when it needs to.” They frowned, thinking briefly about the way the sentience had said it was the closest place they could exist near home.. What was home to it?

“So you accidentally found a natural fon slot and happened to meet Shadow,” Jade continued for them.

“If you’re willing to go with it: kinda,” Feora sighed. “But I would say that… Shadow reached out first. It must have.. I don’t know, noticed me for my innate talents and sense of humor. I considered it to be some kind of weird instinct at first, until I met it.”

“You were _chosen_ by the aggregate sentience of the first fonon,” Jade sighed, tone clearly showing how impossible that was.

“Must be,” Feora sighed in return. “Believe it or not, I met Shadow. Believe it or not, Shadow is the only reason I survived in Theor Forest until I found my way out.”

“How so?”

“It.. protects me, I guess. After a few days of being lost I was starting to fade, and it spoke to me, kinda. It’s way of talking is weird, but whatever,” they shook their head and crossed their arms again. “Shadow offered to make a… bond of some sort. I don’t really know what to call it, but I still have it.”

“A _bond_? What does it entail exactly?”

“Shadow kept me alive when I should have died,” Feora answered plainly. “Until I found my way out of the forest and to civilization. And since then, Shadow is always with me.”

“You said that it existed because of the fon slot,” Jade countered.

Feora frowned. “Look, I’m not super into fonon….ology or whatever. But what I can get is that Shadow is in every first fonon, technically. It’s just when there’s a lot of it that Shadow becomes more potent and tangible,” they said. “And somehow, since then, I’ve been able to communicate with Shadow wherever I am.”

“ _Communicate_ ,” Jade huffed. “How convenient that your story happens to speak to one of the most recent theories about aggregate sentiences.”

Feora grinned. "Good to know the scientists are reaching my level of enlightenment."

Jade narrowed his eyes minutely. “Unfortunately, that does nothing to prove your story, given that you’ve spent your life as a spy and have quite a bit of information that you are not supposed to.”

Feora grinned. “Way too much,” they agreed in a cheerful voice that did not help their case. But they were proud of it, dammit!

“In that case, I have no reason to trust you, and no proof to your story.”

Feora looked at him for a moment, and then smirked. “You’re the fonon genius, aren’t you? You’ve noticed. I saw you look.”

Jade did a very good job of keeping his expression neutral, but Feora knew they were right. “Look at?”

Feora rolled their eyes. “You can tell when I mess with the arte I’m casting,” they explained. “You look at me every time. Not a coincidence anymore.”

“It is remarkably dangerous to work with fonons in a freeform sense, outside of an established arte,” Jade said firmly. “All I know is you consistently put everyone at risk when you cast.”

Feora laughed. “Bullshit and you know it.”

“I don’t trust you in any aspect,” Jade said loftily. “That doesn’t change when it comes to highly volatile manipulation of artes.”

Feora grinned. “You’re gonna hate this then, ‘cause I’ve got your proof.” They held out a hand, and within moments Jade was in a defensive stance. Their expression didn’t change, however, as they closed their eyes for just a moment. A second later, their hand closed into a fist, taking the light with it. All of it.

Feora felt Shadow thrumming through their veins, and they grinned again at the Colonel, opening their eyes. There was nothing save for him and them in the darkness. There was no light to illuminate either of them, and yet here they were, looking at each other, when they couldn’t even see the ground beneath their feet.

“Good enough?” they asked, tipping their head.

“I thought you were at least smart enough to come up with a _small_ example. You’re likely to take out the whole town with this.”

“Then stop me,” Feora said, not sounding worried at all. They smirked again when the Colonel did not move. “I’m not lying to you, Jade. I’m not your enemy, and I won’t fight you.”

“You _will_ run away instead,” he stated.

“Maybe, but you have to admit, you still don’t know how I did it before,” they responded. “But maybe you can figure it out now. Either way, can I pass now? Thanks.”

“All you’ve proven is that you’ve been hiding vital information from us,” Jade said.

“You said to prove anything I said was true!” Feora protested. “I said I knew Shadow, and now here you are in darkness. If you’re so worried about it, though, talk to Ion. Ion already knows about the Dark Wings, so I’ve been hiding _nothing_.”

“Ah, I’ve forgotten that overwhelming, unnatural control of the first fonon isn’t something worth noting,” Jade commented.

Feora groaned and dropped their arms. “I’m _tired,_ Jade, I wanna go to the _inn_ ,” they whined. They took a few steps forward, and then a few more when he didn’t move. It wasn’t until they had passed him that Feora let the darkness drop, but they figured they should give him something. They did want him to learn to trust them, after all, and it was frankly infuriating that he would find any reason not to.

So they paused behind him and spoke. “You have to give me a chance,” they said quietly. “At least one. If I betray you in any way, then do as you wish, but you haven’t given me a chance yet.”

Jade scoffed. “Do as I wish, you say. I quite expect you to attempt to slip away again when I do.”

Feora paused, and then spoke without really allowing themself to process the words. “I won’t, then.”

“No?” Jade turned. Feora could tell because of the shuffling of the sand, and then because of the sharp prod between their shoulder blades. Cold metal pricked at their skin and they tensed automatically. “I’ll hold you to that.”

“...Fine,” Feora answered, unsure of how their voice would sound to him. They didn’t care. They wanted to go. So they kept walking, and the sharp spear did not follow them, nor did the man behind it.

Feora didn’t like this anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone please let me tell you how spirits became fonons please im dying


	12. The Core Entry Operation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's where Feora meets their match, and we get to *really* see Shadow in action. Also we've nearly come to the point where I'm actually up to in writing so uh. Really rough/very little editing on my part sorry.
> 
> This takes place during the Core Entry Operation to stop Auldrant's core from vibrating and making more miasma.

An entire town massacred in their name, and Jade stood at the helm of the Tartarus nonetheless. Someone other than Feora might have said it was because he was heartless and callous, but Feora could understand it. There was a desperate need after tragedy to just… keep moving. Not everyone had it, but it was definitely Feora’s first instinct. 

The others were grieving in their own way, but Jade had instantly gone for the bridge to begin travelling to their drop point. This was a time sensitive mission. He had no time for grief. Feora followed him, to their own surprise. They figured that his other mission was to keep track of them, so they might as well give him one less thing to worry about during all this. So, instead of cheering the others up or processing their own feelings, they stepped between bridge stations, reading out important measures when they came up.

Tear joined them first, looking furious and close to tears even with a stoic expression on. Feora knew the feeling. They gestured to a station that could use her, and Tear nodded before sitting down and joining them in their work. The others filed in slowly, but Luke was the first to speak. He was the first to ask what he needed to do to help, and that was when Jade finally spoke as well. 

Jade gave solemn preparation orders, ensuring that the ship would continue towards their destination even when their party needed to sleep. He, Guy, and Tear would trade off steering the Tartarus. Feora would offer to take shifts, but he always seemed to find some menial task to excuse them with. It wasn’t until Feora threatened to call him out on it that he admitted to the truth:

“I do not trust you, and I am not leaving a single part of this mission up to chance. If I’m wrong, so be it, your chances start _after_ this mission.”

Fine. Fine, then. They would back off for now, but it was still stupid of him. 

He assigned them each tasks, integral, important tasks, all but Feora. Because he was obnoxious. At least, that was Feora’s assessment. This time, the reason was: “Your job is what it always was, _Feste_ the Entertainer,” he had said in that far too smug tone. “So keep the morale up. It wouldn’t do to have you _sabotage_ the mission, after all.”

Ugh. Feora hated him. Mostly because he was right. _Of course_ they wouldn’t do anything to upset the others during this Very Important Mission. But they certainly had some _words_ for the Very Important Colonel afterwards. In the meantime, they kept up their cheerful smile, even if Guy seemed to be trying to throw Feora a bone. 

After the five days of this torture, the group had arrived at the point where they would drop to the planet’s core. The big moment, the true performance -- only ten hours to save the planet and get out alive.

Or make that nine. 

Lovely. 

The procedure began as planned. Feora stood to the side as planned, their only solace that they could at least provide Fon Master Ion with some comfort. But the line was drawn at the intruder. Jade brushed off the fact that there was an intruder on board like there was _nothing_ to be done about it, and Feora was not having that. 

He refused when they offered to go investigate.

He refused and told them not to derail the mission.

He refused and trusted an intruding _stranger_ more than the Fool who had been travelling with him for months now!

The Fool wasn’t having it. They were definitely a fool to disobey Jade so soon after their confrontation, but they weren’t an idiot: if this intruder was trying to stop them, Feora wouldn’t let them all die here. They left the bridge with only a few shouts of concern, knowing that none of them had the leeway to follow until the mission was over.

They would deal with the intruder themself.

They went immediately to the deck. It was where the Albiore was waiting to fly them to safety, and -- unlike Jade -- Feora figured that an _intruder_ was probably trying to kill them all. So, surprise of surprises, there was the intruder, rubbing his foot over the glyph that was meant to fly them safely home at the end of the mission.

He had turned to face them before they had fully gotten to the entrance of the deck. “Sync the Tempest,” they sighed, having had quite enough of the God Generals lately. Having had quite enough of a lot, lately. They glanced over the deck, and the long, spindly shadows that the railings cast across the whole plaza, flickering back and forth and all over the place with the strange light cast by the core.

Perfect.

They had no reason to hold back here. He charged at them with no playful banter, but by the time he had, they had already melted into the shadows. Less than a moment later they had arisen from his own, and said in the same bored tone they had learned from Jade, “I don’t think erasing that will really help us along.”

He swung his laugh around with his leg, barely having to register their movements. “Too bad, _princess._ ” Feora dived back into his shadow as his kick nearly hit them, and came back up several meters away. “You’re going to die here, along with the rest of your friends.”

Feora smirked and huffed out a laugh, raising some strands of the first fonon around Sync. “Bold of you to assume I have friends.” The tendrils wrapped around him and whipped him as Feora moved their fingers. He didn’t even try to dodge them, it seemed. He merely winced when he was hit, but nonetheless charged at them again.

Feora dodged the attack by jumping to another shadow, but he had turned to face their new location faster than they would have thought humanly possible. Alright then, hand to hand, for a while. They fashioned the fonons to replicate their weapon in battle, a thick tendril that they spun to snake around their leg with the weight of a dangerous flail.

Sync darted to their left, and in an instant, Feora reversed the spin, sending the bulk of their magic bashing into his right shoulder and sliding through with the ease of a hot knife. He stumbled and shouted as they jerked the shadow back, wrapping the rest of it around their arms and chest in a few quick movements.

With the same speed of a viper, the end of the tendril shot from their arm to follow up the attack before Sync had a chance. It connected with another huff of breath from him. “Come on, I thought we were having a dance here,” they hummed, spinning the shadows. “This seems rather one-sided.”

He emitted a scoff of a laugh. “Your fonic artes are unique. But playtime is over.”

Feora figured that was a good enough cue. They jumped with an astounding force to smash the weapon down upon his head. He slipped through their arms in a gust of light, and pain erupted through their back as his fist, and then another, connected.

They gasped a forced laugh and jumped back to face him again. He followed the attack with another roundhouse kick, with the added force of the third fonon behind it. Feora ducked under him; in a fluid movement, twirling the shadow around her leg and attempting to unbalance him with a swing. He dodged the attack and responded in kind with a quick elbow right through their damn chest.

Feora lost their breath from the hit, and before they could suffer another, they shifted back into the shadows right at his feet. They could barely tell what he was doing as they regained their breath, but.. It seemed like he was just standing there. They slipped through the jumping shadows to one near the railings and rose, a small sigh coming from them as they did. 

As suddenly as they had arrived, Sync had launched himself next to them. They swerved around him as he aimed another fist, but he quickly accompanied the miss with a foot placed under their own. As they recovered from being unbalanced, he fluidly brought a leg down where their shoulders should have been if they hadn’t slunk away again. 

Excuse. Me. That was the same move they had just used. That was _rude_ and … _RUDE._ They simmered in the shadows, confusion lacing through their ethereal form when he stopped dead in place again. He was in the same position as before, completely still. Feora came back up, and he turned towards them again with barely a moment’s processing. 

A horrible, horrible thought entered Feora’s mind at his seamless movement, and while they dodged his new attack, they flung a hand across his eyes. The first fonon flooded his vision, leaving nothing. It was the reason they would never fear Jade, or any other. They would always be able to get away.

But his movements didn’t change, and his attack hit them right in the gut, rather like their panic. They melted away again, this time far more concerned. Their spell should have taken his sight. He should be helpless. He hadn’t even reacted.

By Yulia, he was _blind_ , Feora realized with a moment of terror. They could entrap a person with vision in moments but this… They needed to end this. They emerged from behind him again, attempting to keep as silent as possible, but he still swung a leg down on their shoulder, bringing them to their knees with a shout. Before he could land another hit, they pivoted underneath him, slinging the void rope they had been neglecting over his chest. 

Feora yanked Sync backwards and pulled tightly at the strings around him, which went taut around his neck. He gave a strangled gasp, and Feora only held on tighter, keeping their form on top of him as the shadows did their work. It didn’t last long. Where a normal target would panic, he forced Feora from him with a tight roll. Feora went with him, forced to crash into the ground, and just enough to loosen their control on the rope. Before either of them could catch their breath, Sync was upon them.

He was quick and efficient, and Feora was dazed enough that their only response was to attempt to take his vision again as he disabled one of their knees so they couldn’t run. A second later came a jab to their stomach to wind them once again, and a few more dazing hits to their head before they could regain their senses enough to wonder why he wasn’t stopping.

They formed a new ball of shadow around them to try and protect themself from his attacks, but red colored their right eye before they could even register the pain. The moment they felt that on their brow, his next punch connected with the left side of their jaw. A knee came to their chest, and they had fallen into the shadows before he could finish his round by slamming her head against the floor of the Tartarus.

He was going to win, Feora realized with terror. The only place they were safe was in the shadows, and they could do nothing to stop him from erasing the glyph from there. They felt cold fear lace through them, before it was immediately followed by a gentle warmth which crawled over their injuries and crept in lines through their veins.

 _I am here_. _You will be strong. Go._

It echoed through their entire being, sending support in its purest form. They did as they were told, and rose from the shadows far from Sync. Before they had even fully reformed, a raw mass of darkness erupted around him and his scream of torment reached their ears. The darkness would not disorient him, but it could still drain him. They raised their hands like marionettes, laced with black scars that pulsed with their blood, and smashed a void of shadow into him with one hand. They clenched a fist, which granted them a scream from the inside. He couldn’t handle this for long. No one could.

They waved another hand, feeling a shadow slice through him. They continued, batting the God General inside like he was no more than a doll. He fell from side to side, hitting the ground roughly and with enraged shouts that should have been growing weak. They should have been stopping soon. Feora's vision blurred before Shadow sent another burst of strength to them. They raised both hands with the first fonon’s help, and created a sea of flailing, shadowy arms around Sync. Every hand would grab him, sap him of his strength. Shadow held them upright, but Feora was straining to stay standing. Their hands shook, even as Sync cried out inside. He would be unable to move any second now. Any second now.

There was movement from the other side of their dark pyre, and they were only able to realize who it was in the same instant Sync’s beaked mask and his unforgiving foot broke against their head as they escaped. They collapsed, even with Shadow’s support, and could tell that it was only their mind, not their body that had fallen into the darkness.

The agony reappeared with their vision seconds later, made clear by the way he was dragging them by their hair. They could still feel Shadow breathing support into them, but they could do little more than look up through the blood in their eyes. Sync grabbed the back of their clothes and hauled them from the ground. “Move one more step, and your demon here dies!” he shouted towards them.

Them -- the group Feora had done this for. It had been enough then. They had time. The relief they felt was just enough to let them be snarky one last time. “Rude,” they muttered at Sync, trying to sound as offended as they possibly could.

“Feora!”

They could hear several of them call out, far more concerned than they would expect. Their voices were indecipherable amongst each other, and when they tried to play off their predicament, they could only cough out some red liquid in response. It was super eloquent. 

“This is your plan, then?” came Jade’s voice, demanding answers from Sync. “You will die as well, if we’re trapped down here.”

“So be it!” Sync snarled, the force of his emotions jostling his hand and Feora’s body uncomfortably. “Your foolish plan will end here, with all of us!”

Feora forced their head up to look at the others. Each of them shouting responses to Sync or looking for openings.. Except for Jade Curtiss. Jade Curtiss was looking at them. At Feora.

They blinked, trying to clear more blood from their vision, and frowned. What was he looking at _them_ for? He raised an eyebrow slowly, and gave a pointed glance to Sync.

Oh. It was a warning. They could work with that.

Steeling themself, they barely nodded to him, blood pulsing once again in response. Shadow was ready. The others continued trying to reason with the God General, while Jade held three fingers at his hip.

“Forgive me if I don’t find this plan all that reasonable,” he said in a terse voice.

Two. “I have no need to explain myself to _you,_ ” Sync snarled with a venom he hadn’t shown before.

One. “It’s clear what our next option is,” Jade said calmly. His fist clenched, and his spear appeared in a burst of light. Feora summoned the last of their strength from Shadow to slip through Sync’s fingers right as his lethal blow landed right where their head had been a moment before. They dragged themself as far as they could without a clear path to follow, but soon they could barely move. 

Still… it was fine. They had done their job, and if nothing else, they had the spiteful glee of knowing that Jade would forever know he was _wrong._ They breathed a ragged breath, closing their eyes and willing Shadow to go home. There was no need to bother with them for this part.They were grateful for its support, but a dying human was still just a human.

The resistance they were met with shocked them into a harsh view of reality. Their wounds throbbed and they groaned in pain before they were met with the kindest face they knew. “Feora, hold on!” Natalia urged them, light shining around her golden hair and radiating from her hands as she tried to close the Jester’s wounds.

“Natalia..” Feora whispered, but coughed before they could say anything else. Shadow extended a caring thought through the pain.

“You’re going to be fine,” Natalia answered calmly and firmly, as if there were no alternative.

“I-Is the glyph still there?” Feora asked instead, trying to turn their head to check. They couldn’t see past the blurred, lightning quick steps of battle that happened to their side. Their stomach dropped. All of that, and it looked like they had barely slowed Sync down. How could he still be fighting with this much strength?

“Yes, most of it,” Natalia told them with a small, reassuring smile. “You’ve been a great help, so just hold on for now.”

Feora fell back against the ground, closing their eyes and grimacing. “I couldn't.. let myself get killed for nothing, right?” they emitted.

“Nonsense. You’re barely injured, don’t worry,” Natalia said firmly again. Feora winced as a wound tried to close but couldn’t quite make it, and Natalia gave a low apology. They wanted to explain to Natalia the amount of respect they held for her. She was a true princess. She was an amazing leader, and a kind person-- the kind of person that Feora would have wished to be if they were still a princess.

But they couldn’t bring up the energy to form words. They couldn’t really process anything but the emotions Shadow would send, and the vague knowledge of what was happening around them. The fight was slowing, and then it ended. And then Ion was crying, and Feora was slowly guided to sitting up. They didn’t know what had happened. Their whole body cried out in pain as they sat.

And then, as if they weren’t already pressed for time, Lorelai decided to pop in and speak through Tear. Feora’s own irritation was mirrored by Shadow, if only out of worry for their own life. Too much was happening, and they didn’t know what to make of any of it.

“Natalia, you have to go,” they murmured. “We’re running out of time.”

“Then stand up,” Natalia said in response, lifting Feora’s arm over her shoulders. Tear collapsed in the middle of the deck. Feora tried to stand, and couldn’t. They cried out in pain as their leg gave out under them, and they dragged Natalia back to the ground.

“I can’t walk,” they said after a moment’s recovery. The others had begun to move towards the Albiore. Jade called out that they needed to hurry on board.

“We can do this, just a little more,” Natalia said urgently, as Luke carried Tear inside the ship.

Feora swore loudly when they tried to move again to no avail. The plane was meters away, and they couldn’t fathom getting even that far anymore. “Natalia, go on. You’ve gotta get out of here.”

“I’m not leaving you!” Natalia insisted vehemently.

Feora tried to protest again, but then felt a second form lift their arm and drag them forward. They were shocked into silence when they registered that it was Jade himself. Jade Curtiss, the one who didn’t trust them with his dirty laundry, helped bring them to the Albiore. Feora didn’t know what to think of it, nor any of it, but when they lay on the floor of the plane’s hold, they felt almost like crying.

They didn’t, though. Shadow bid them a gentle farewell, and evaporated into the air around them. Without the first fonon’s support, Feora passed out completely.

It was a welcome reprieve from pain and confusing emotions. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter we finally get gender talks o...o


	13. In Which Nobody Knows How To Gender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang reacts to Feora almost dying. Guy yells at Jade. It's very exciting. And then there's a bit of gender stuff but Feora never answers questions right anyway so its brief.

Guy was not happy. Everyone was worried of course, as was expected from them when someone they cared about was hurt. But Guy in particular seemed out of sorts. He was _brooding_ , for one, leaning against a wall with his arms crossed, quietly listening -- or plotting. Who knew anymore.

“Why would Feora go that far?” Tear was asking, having recovered from her own ordeal.

“She should have come back and got help before fighting him alone!” Luke agreed, clenching his fists in frustration.

“None of us would have had the freedom to stop the mission,” Jade told them firmly. “She was the only one who could.”

“You positive about that, Jade?” Guy demanded, his voice as cold as the glance he gave to the Colonel. Oh my, was he truly upset with _Jade?_

Jade, however, made no sign of surprise. “Of course. What other reason could there be?”

Guy seemed to clench his jaw. “I don’t know. Maybe something about how you’ve been egging her- _them_ on every second you get.”

“How very unlike me,” Jade drawled. “It’s like you don’t know me at all, Guy.”

Guy’s jaw did clench. “Dammit, Jade! You _know_ it’s different! Any chance Feora had to feel comfortable with us, you jump in and begin questioning them. Any time sh- they do something to help us, you throw it back in their face. _More_ than normal for any one of us.”

Anise chimed in to help. “Guy.. the Colonel _doesn’t_ trust her. And neither do I.”

“Anise..” Ion chided her softly, and she pouted.

“Not trusting her- dammit, _them_ \- is different,” Guy insisted, looking to Anise. “You’re not hounding Feora every minute.”

Jade sighed. “There’s not trusting her, and there’s finding her openly lying,” he said with an open-palmed shrug.

“If you’ve found Feora lying, I’d love to hear you share that with the group,” Guy argued. “Instead of hiding it yourself, maybe.”

The others looked to Jade, who sighed that melodramatic sigh once again. “I believe we all saw her artes. Her powers are abnormal and dangerous. She will not tell me why.”

“That’s not-”

“ _And,_ ” Jade continued through the interruption, “the ‘family’ that she so often talks about is none other than the Dark Wings.”

“The _Dark Wings?_ ” Luke sounded aghast, horrified.

“You mean that old lady?” Anise grumped, sounding just as displeased. “Oh, I knew I didn’t like her…”

“That's right,” Jade said. “I would say that calls for a more critical look at-”

“Jade,” Ion cut in, his voice firm yet soft. “I.. don’t know whether my words have any credit anymore.. But I knew about Feora’s family. She never hid that truth from me.”

They looked to Ion, clutching his staff as if it would give him comfort. “Ion.. you knew?” Anise asked, looking shocked.

Ion nodded. “She saw them when Asch had hired them to have me open the sephiroth in the Zao Ruins,” he explained. “That is what she was apologizing for when we first met with the Emperor.”

Jade pushed up his glasses. “I fail to see how Feora aiding in your kidnapping clears her of any guilt.”

“It doesn’t, but it means that she wasn’t lying either,” Ion said quietly. “She has been working hard since then to apologize for it and regain our trust.”

“But Ion, she _kidnapped you_ ,” Anise pointed out.

“She didn’t,” Ion said. “She found us and was made to come along. That’s all.”

“Still..”

“I trust Feora,” Luke put in, frowning determinedly. 

Natalia nodded as well. “As do I. If her family _is_ the Dark Wings, then perhaps that is why they helped us escape Baticul after the King..”

“I think so too,” Guy agreed, crossing his arms again. “Why else would they help us? They’re just bandits. No need to put their lives on the line for us, but they did.”

Jade sighed. “Unless her _intention_ is to get close to us. She is a spy and a master of deception. She-”

“Jade!” Guy interrupted, glaring at him. “You have to give Feora a chance. You gave me and Luke second chances, so how is this any different?”

“You were not lying with the intent of assassinating the Emperor.”

“You _don’t know that_ ,” Guy said emphatically. “You don’t know that Feora is or isn’t, and you treated me better when you knew I was outright lying about who I was.”

Jade sighed and pushed his glasses up again. “What response are you looking for, Guy?”

“I’m telling you to leave her alone! Give her a _chance_ ,” Guy said. “So that she doesn’t try to _sacrifice_ herself again just to prove to you that sh- _they’re_ on our side!”

“Fine,” Jade said simply, putting his hands in his pockets.

Guy deflated and looked like he didn’t believe Jade’s answer, but then he sighed and dropped it, turning to go. “We should rest,” he said over his shoulder. That gave the others the leave to disperse, and they all did, awkwardly casting glances back at Jade and Guy. Oh no. 

* * *

Feora awoke in a room nearly as dark as their own mind had been. The only light came from reflections off of a waterfall outside, flickers and glows bouncing off the walls.

A waterfall outside meant one of two places... Grand Chokmah or Yulia City. Now, Feora was glad to have their brother again, but they rather hoped it wasn't Grand Chokmah. After the beating they got in that battle, they doubted Peony would sit idly by while they insisted on leaving right away.

But the sheets were too crisp. The air had a strange smell to it, and Grand Chokmah always seemed to have the slightest glow of gentle blue waves. Here, the only glow was artificial yellow and hazy purple.

Yulia City, then. The closest place to land after exiting the core. But how long had it been? Feora shuffled to try and sit up, but moving hurt all over.

“Feora?” a sweet, familiar voice came from near the window, and they turned to see a silhouette. “Oh thank goodness you’re awake. How do you feel? Shall I summon the healer?”

Feora had to take a few seconds to blink and place the voice. “N-Natalia? What are you doing here?”

“Watching over you, silly,” she said. “You were quite injured.”

“Sync..” Feora recalled, feeling their stomach clench at the thought. “W-What happened?”

“He fell,” Natalia murmured. “Into the core.. He..” she trailed off, looking discomforted by the memory. “What do you remember?”

Feora felt like they were going to be sick. “I.. not much. I fought him and then.. Ion was crying and Tear got hurt?”

Natalia took a few moments to explain what had happened, what they had learned, and of Sync’s suicide. Feora didn’t know how to feel about it all. “But you should continue to rest,” Natalia told them firmly, standing up. “Everyone has been quite worried. I shall tell them that you’re doing just fine.”

“Everyone?” Feora emitted a little laugh. “Some less than others, I think.”

Natalia paused for a moment that Feora didn’t expect, before slowly sinking back into the chair. “...Is it true, Feora?”

“Uh, what?” Feora making hints at Jade not liking them wasn’t new. Everyone knew that Jade and Anise at least didn’t trust them. It was a point of fact, but Natalia looked distraught.

“That you would sacrifice your life to.. Prove a point?”  
“Huh?”

Natalia looked at her clasped hands, fidgeting a little. “It is… what Guy said,” she explained. “That you felt you had to sacrifice yourself in order to gain our trust.”

Feora blinked and kept silent for a moment, put on the spot.

“I- Forgive me if it was rude to ask, but you must know that-”

“It’s okay,” Feora interrupted before she could say any more. “I didn’t think I was going to lose when I left. I wasn’t planning to do any sacrificing.”

Natalia sighed in relief. “Then.. Guy’s qualms with the Colonel are untrue?”

“Qualms?” Feora raised an eyebrow. “What did he say?”

Natalia glanced around almost like she would be caught gossiping. “He was quite angry. He insisted that Jade had been attempting to goad you into an act of sacrifice to earn his trust.”

Feora frowned, mulling it over. “I mean.. Does he trust me now? If it worked, that’s cool.”

“Feora!” Natalia sounded chastised. “You cannot mean to say that you went to fight Sync purely because Jade…”

Feora shrugged and grinned. “I’m petty,” they said proudly.

“You’re foolish!” Natalia insisted, puffing in frustration. “You could have at least asked for our help speaking to Jade!”  
“It’s fine, Natalia,” Feora assured her. “I can handle it. I’m not pushed around that easily.”

“Has he done anything? He hasn’t _threatened_ you, has he?” Natalia looked worried. “I wish to trust Jade, I truly do, but I’ve never seen Guy so angry..”

Feora almost blushed. All for little ol’ them? “It’s fine,” they repeated. “He just wants to protect Peony.”

“Has he threatened you, Feora?” Natalia drew her face in horror. “Please tell me he hasn’t.”

Feora grimaced inside. That would have to be an outright lie, then. “He just... knows more about my family than anyone else. That’s why.”

Natalia deflated and looked down at her hands again. “He told us about them.”

Ahahah. Feora’s stomach hollowed out in fear, and they gave a forced smile. “Oh, yeah?”

Natalia nodded. “The.. Dark Wings,” she said in a low tone.

Feora held back a sigh and then failed. Fine. “..Yeah.”

“Is that why they helped us in Baticul?” 

“I don’t know. They work for Asch, I think,” Feora said. “And he wanted to save you too, so..” The silence that came after their words was too uncomfortable for them. “..L-Look, I’m sorry, Natalia but- they’re my family. I can’t just- I swear, they’re not that bad, they just-”

“You do not need to justify them,” Natalia interrupted. “After all.. We cannot choose our family.”

“I..” Feora grimaced. “I know. I just.. I trust them. Even now.” They sighed and looked at the door to the room. “Jade thinks that I’ll give away some big secret because of it, or maybe, I dunno, turn around and sabotage you guys.”

“You wouldn’t do that,” Natalia said, almost sounding amused at the thought. It made Feora feel warm to think that she trusted them that much.

“How do you know?”

“Because I know that we are the same,” Natalia said, her voice slowing as she put her thoughts to word. “When we see people suffering -- even those not of our nations -- we are not the type to stand by. I do not think that kind of person would choose to hurt their friends.”

Feora _really_ felt warm now. They didn’t even know what to say. “Thanks..” is what came out, which was probably the lamest response in the history of responses.

“You should continue to rest,” Natalia said, standing. “I’ll get you some food and the healer to check on you.”

“Okay.. Thank you,” Feora repeated.

Natalia smiled. “Next time you speak with your family… I would like to meet them.”

Feora, shocked yet again, nodded mutely before the Princess left. Then, they fell back against the pillows, which was a mistake because they were still injured so that _hurt_. Ugh.

* * *

Feora knew that Jade was aware of their presence. Even if he hadn’t turned around, he ever so slightly turned his head in their direction, just enough for them to notice. They sighed when he didn’t speak and crossed their arms. “So, now what?” they demanded.

They had expressly broken his orders, even if it _had_ saved their lives. With how inhospitable Jade had been, Feora almost wouldn’t have been surprised if he tried to make them leave for it. He didn’t, though. He sighed in almost an emulation of their own.

“You get your chance,” he said in a bland tone.

“Really?” Feora smirked even if he couldn’t see it. “All it took was disobeying you, too. Maybe I should stop listening to you.”

“As if you ever were,” Jade huffed. He turned around, leaning against the railing that he had been looking over. He frowned for a moment, looking over them, before forcing the light, vaguely amused expression they were all used to. “Keep in mind that I’m holding you to your promise. If you run, I will find you.”

Feora raised their hands along with their eyebrows. “‘ _Keep in mind_ ’,” they copied his tone, “That you only get to fight me if I betray you, which isn’t gonna happen. But yeah. Sure.”

“After your display today, I’m sure you’ll have quite the performance ready,” Jade answered.

Feora gave him a Look. “If you really want to spar, just ask. I'll happily kick your ass without you doing this whole ‘I don’t trust you’ nonsense.”

Jade chuckled a little. “I’m not quite willing to share with you every trick up my sleeve.”

Feora grinned, even if they didn’t feel like it. “Well, you’ve seen all mine now, so it’s only fair that you do.”

“Oh well. I guess you’ll have to suffer in your ignorance.” Feora whined in response and crossed their arms, to which Jade only put his hands in his pocket and watched them in amusement. “Another thing,” he said when their tone fell. “Guy made it very clear he was avoiding calling you a woman today. Is there something I should know?”

Feora gave a terse laugh. “Should? Bit presumptuous, don’t you think?”

Jade raised an eyebrow and rephrased. “Why was Guy referring to you as ‘they’?”

“I told him to. You’ve seen me when I’m other genders, too. It’s a bit more accurate, I guess,” Feora said. They shrugged then, continuing. “I figured that I might be able to be a.. Half-way point for him, I suppose. With his fear of women and all.. I’m not always a woman so…”

“So he might be able to ease his way out of his fear. Interesting.”

“I hope so,” Feora said with another shrug. “I wouldn’t have brought it up if it weren’t for that though. I’m used to people looking at me as a woman, even if I don’t like it. One of the freedoms of being Feste.”

“Clown make-up _does_ make it a little more difficult to determine gender,” Jade agreed.

“Just the way I like it,” Feora grinned.

“So, as a halfway point, you are..?”

Feora blinked. “Uh.. Neither. Either. Many? Variable? Yes, no, maybe so?” They finished the lack of an answer with decisive finger guns and short laugh.

“Eloquent,” Jade commented.

“Mmmm.. no, that wasn’t on the gender list,” Feora responded instantly.

He didn’t hide his absolutely _finished_ sigh, which then ended in him walking away. “..And now I’m going to bed before I get any more non-answers.”

Feora laughed wickedly at the response, and bounced on their toes. “Goodnight!” they chirped, spinning around to rest in their inn room again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im getting really super jumpy with plot tbh. I wrote another thing after this but it is straight up like... you skip a good fourth of the game after this. Will I fill in the blanks or just go with it? Dunno. I love you.


	14. Short Chapter After Which I Skip All the Important Plot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a few scenes where Tear doesn't want to go to the doctor alone and be fussed over. And then I've given up and just jump forward a whole bunch. (Feat. A surprise convo with Luke!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay here’s the deal man. I’ve been stuck here for way too long. Feora doesn’t have a personal thing against Van but also like they don’t want to die so they’re def coming along to the absorption gate.  
> But what to write there? No idea. It’s Big Plot and it’s mostly Tear and Luke development and I love them, but that’s not what we’re doing here so…  
> Here is my Short Chapter which will then jump right to after defeating Van at the Absorption Gate! They all get to go home! Yay!

“Feora, you should see a doctor here as well,” Tear spoke up as the others fussed over her. Feora could understand deflecting from being fussed over but…

“Huh? Me?” They didn’t have to feign surprise, even if it was a bit exaggerated.

Tear nodded. “Of course. You were also severely hurt. We cannot risk the possibility that Sync has done something to have a lasting effect on you.”

“Oh. Uh.. Right,” Feora figured that made sense, but shrugged. “I feel fine now though, just a bit sore.”

“Honestly, it’s probably a good idea,” Guy added in. “Considering when we found you you were…”

He trailed off and Feora raised an eyebrow before realizing what they had seen. Great. They played it off with a grin. “...Dying?” they supplied cheerily. They did not look pleased with that answer.

Jade huffed. “Tear is correct. It’s better to be safe than sorry.”

Feora grinned and cooed. “Are you _worried_ about me, Jade?”

“Hah. Not if you keep making that face. I take it that you didn’t notice that your skin looked like it was strained through a spider web?”

Feora grimaced. “That’s…” Explainable, really, but they didn’t want to explain things when Tear needed to go in to see that doctor _now._ Jade raised an eyebrow, and Feora huffed before marching forward and grabbing Tear’s arm in theirs. “Alright, alright, c’mon Tear. We have a whole crowd worrying about us, after all! Can’t keep them waiting.” 

Tear stumbled after Feora as they dragged her into the clinic, the others following close behind. Feora would suffer a check-up to get Tear into that doctor’s office, and _then_ they could explain that it was perfectly normal for them to be drained through a sieve when they were summoning. 

* * *

Unfortunately for them, Jade had pieced together that fact rather quickly, given their lack of concern. Even a Fool could see their own hands in a crisis, and Feste’s had been slashed to pieces by strands of pitch black as they lay there dying. Both before and after they had _completely shed_ their bodily form to teleport a few feet away from the God General. It had become overwhelmingly clear to him that Feste the Entertainer had _some_ sort of connection to the first fonon, one that had him increasingly believing that they were not human. Whatever the alternative was, he wasn’t exactly waiting around to find out.

“It’s fascinating, Dr. Balfour!” the technician squeaked to his side, making him cringe internally at the title.

“Isn’t it,” he responded plainly, looking over the chart of blood work that he had additionally requested. Unfortunately, all seemed human and normal, except..

“I have no idea how this is affecting your friend, but she has an _exceptional_ amount of first fonon blood activity. I’d say she was a fonist, but this surpasses even the greatest-!”

“It is not unexpected,” Jade interrupted the technician with a polite smile. “It doesn’t seem to affect them negatively, so that is all we need for now. Thank you, nurse.”

The nurse hesitated for a moment, but then nodded quickly before gathering his things and heading out.

Jade sighed after the nurse left. Feste was ever a problem. One that could boil over at any second, and yet he had no choice but to abide by the group’s verdict for now. He would play nice, but he wouldn’t be too proud to say “I told you so” when the time came.

* * *

“Luke, literally everyone in this group has something in their past they’ve been hiding. Well, except Natalia I guess,” Feora said, and then realized out loud, “But still. We all have guilty pasts.”

“But- That doesn’t change what I did..” Luke protested, looking almost close to tears.

“I know, Luke,” Feora said, letting their voice grow gentler. “But you have to give yourself the same credit you give us. The only difference is that your friends were there to see your guilt, and trust me.. However much it sucks, it’s way better than being alone in it.”

“There’s no way they can trust me anymore. I’m shocked when anyone agrees with me,” Luke said.

“Then you’re an idiot,” Feora said plainly, giving an open palmed shrug that they had picked up from a certain frustration in their life. “And not a idiot like me. I have fun being dumb. There’s no point in being dumb if you’re not happy about it.”

“You… don’t make sense,” Luke pointed out, puffing up a little in frustration.

“That’s my job, so quit trying to steal it,” Feora huffed back. “If you can trust _Van’s sister_ , _Count Gardios_ , and _Dr. Balfour_ , but not yourself..? That’s on you. We’ve all got pasts, Luke. They make us who we are now, for better or for worse, and I sure as hell am not going to let yours make it for worse.”

“Ugh… I have no idea what you mean,” Luke groaned.

Feora gave a huff of triumph. “I’m saying that you need to trust your friends.”

“I do!” he protested quickly.

“Then trust them to know when they want to stay with you.”

Luke bit his tongue, looking pained at the words, but then drooped in resignation. “I guess.. You’re right.”

“Damn right. Now go do something happy for a bit, will ya? Guy looks bored.” Luke nodded, though he still looked hesitant, but he wandered off in the direction of Guy. Feora sighed a little when he was gone, nodding to themself, pleased.

“We all have guilty pasts, you say?” came the ever-frustrating voice of a Very Important Colonel.

Feora’s second sigh was much less relaxed than the first. “Think of all the grief you’d give me if I eavesdropped on all your conversations like that.”

“I have no doubt that you already do.”

“Man, you really don’t give up,” Feora muttered, whirling around to face Jade. “So, you have something to question me about, then?”

“Something about your own ‘guilty past’ seems prudent,” Jade told them.

“Ah, right, like the guilt of someone hearing their whole family die and someone sacrificed in their place for it? Or did you forget about that, again?” Feora crossed their arms as they ignored their own words.

Jade raised an eyebrow at them to continue, but they grimaced and sighed once again. “You’re so much fun around the others..” they said. “I thought you were going to bite back on the venom for a while. I miss the banter.”

Jade gave a slow shrug, looking only amused for it. “I think you imagine more venom than I give,” he said lightly. “Is it not _normal_ for friends to discuss their feelings?”

Feora huffed and smirked. “If I ever hear you talk about your feelings in earnest, I promise that I will give you all the gald in my wallet.”

“I’m _hurt!_ ” he whined back, staggering at the implied wound.

Feora laughed at him, their chin rising like they’d already won. “In _earnest_ , I said.” A little smirk, and they whirled around to leave with a little wave of their hand. “Seeya next time, Colonel.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh also Jade may be an ass but he thinks gender is fake and respects ur pronouns okay


	15. A Council of Old Men

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After seemingly saving the world at the Absorption Gate, everyone gets to go home. Unfortunately, that means that it's time to start making a final judgement call on whether Feora really gets to call Grand Chokmah home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for gender dysphoric feelings.

They were barely given a day’s break from  _ saving the world _ before Feora and Jade were summoned by the council. Feora thought that was rather unfair, even if they were just some random con-artist. If so, they were a con-artist who had decidedly helped  _ save the fucking world _ so the Council could let them  _ sleep _ for twelve hours if they damn well wanted to.

But the Council disagreed. And the Council could do what the Council wanted to -- unlike Feora and Jade. As such, Feora was left standing to the side of the huge room, surrounded by guards ready to lock them up at any moment. And they were wearing a  _ remarkably _ uncomfortable bodice that Peony had insisted would make the Council underestimate them. Feora did not much like being judged as  _ dainty _ or  _ pure and innocent _ , but if that’s what the Council wanted out of a princess, that was what they would at least halfway provide.. For now.

They tried to swallow their misgiving and discomfort, tried to ignore the sickness that rose in their stomach when they stood, dressed as a woman before a council of old men. Not just as a woman… as a woman who was supposed to be  _ Feora.  _ A woman who was supposed to be them and just.. Wasn’t. They hadn’t thought they were one for stage fright, given their profession.. But they wanted nothing more than to disappear in this moment.

However, Very Important Colonel Jade Curtiss had a report to give. A report that Feora quite expected to land them in an actual dungeon cell to slip out of. They lamented the idea of having to sneak through the palace just to find their Bag of Tricks once again before leaving.. And focused on that lament to avoid having to think about Peony.

“Well, Colonel Curtiss?” The head of the table spoke. “You have been tasked with ascertaining the truth of Feste the Entertainer’s background. What do you have to say today?”

Jade had drawn himself straight as a board before entering the room, but somehow he looked perfectly at home. Feora envied that, honestly. He didn’t look at Feora when he began to speak, and their stomach clenched with fear. “Due to the, frankly, world-threatening matters that were at hand, I have not had sufficient time to judge the character of  _ one _ performer, much less investigate their background.”

Murmurs passed between the men at the table, lost to Feora’s ears as they gaped at Jade. Whatever that was… it  _ wasn’t _ a condemnation. And he hadn’t even  _ stammered _ when addressing them as “they” in front of the  _ whole Council _ . What the hell did any of this mean?

“You have not succeeded in your task, you say?” another Council member spoke up, sounding less than pleased.

“I would ask that you forgive me, sir, that I chose to focus on ensuring our country’s safe descent into the Qliphoth ahead of this investigation.” He gave a short bow that barely seemed to placate the council. “However, I do wish to request an appeal.”

“And that would be..?”

“My appeal to the Council is to postpone the deadline for judgement on the assumption that Feste the Entertainer will remain under supervision until such time that I have gathered an accurate report.” Feora felt like everything had changed in just that moment. Nothing was as it should be, and they were clearly dreaming. Jade’s eyes slid to the side, very clearly making eye contact with them. Feora held their breath, not knowing what to do. He adjusted his glasses, and with the painful little smile that caused Feora so much grief continued with, “ _ My _ supervision, of course.”

Honestly, they couldn’t work past the shock quick enough to force a grin.

* * *

Feora felt sick. Sick and uncomfortable, vulnerable and  _ wrong _ , and yet they couldn’t just leave. Jade had defied their every expectation, and they could suffer this infernal outfit for a few moments to speak to him.

What they would actually say? No idea.

He approached them and their entourage of guards first. “I hope you haven’t gotten too comfortable,” he said before Feora could speak a word.

The response that came from them felt weak, and very unlike who they thought they were. “H-Huh?”

“We leave in the morning.”

“Leave?”

Jade nodded, and gave a winning smirk. “I’m going to make you prove your story.” Feora blinked stupidly in response, which he seemed rather satisfied with. “We leave for Theor tomorrow.”

A second later, and Feora shook their head like waking from a dream. “W-Wait, wait, wait.” The dismay that crossed their face only seemed to make Jade even more smug, but that turned to amusement when their complaint was not what he expected: “But I haven’t  _ gotten to sleep in yeeeeet… _ ”

* * *

When the next day came, and Feora was properly adorned as the Fool they were, meeting with Jade was far easier. It was also far easier for them to blame him for their need to use an alarm clock.

“I thought we were  _ done _ for a while,” they whined as they approached him. Perfectly put together for how stupidly early it was.

“I wouldn’t want you to get too comfortable,” he responded, turning to lead the way. “There is a military landship waiting for us outside of town.” 

“Wait a moment, Jade,” Feora stopped him, also causing the guards at their side to halt in their place. They looked between each other in confusion. It was rather hard for them to know if they should be respecting their Colonel or the potential Royal Highness between them. Poor guards.

“You couldn’t have protested  _ before _ we got up at six in the morning for this?” Jade questioned with a withering sigh as he glanced back at them.

Feora puffed indignantly, refusing to feel embarrassed for how they acted when they weren’t themself. “If you don’t like it, you could have set the time to ten on your own.”

“What is it?” he asked, letting his voice waver wearily.

“No one else,” they answered, crossing their arms and determinedly standing as tall as he did. “Once we’re in Theor, only you’re allowed to meet Shadow.”

“And why is that? Other than an ambush in the woods to catch me off guard.”

Feora glared at him. “No ambush. It’s just that Shadow can’t… handle too many people. It’d dissipate if we all were there, not to mention, I’d like to see you try to lead a squadron of soldiers through the darkest parts of the forest.”

Jade paused a moment, considering and looking them over. “I see. We can discuss it further on the ship,” he said.

“Fine,” Feora hummed. “Just know that that’s my condition. You can’t get mad at me for it later.”

“I’ll do my  _ very _ best,” he lilted in response, beckoning to the guards to continue walking to the town entrance. Feora followed with a little deep breath, and painted on a smile for the journey ahead.

* * *

It was dark, which was to be expected when searching for Shadow, but at this point, Feora was fairly certain that it was just night time. They had managed to convince Jade to come alone into the thick of the forest, given that they set up flares along the route to be found later. Figuring the reputation of the forest, Feora could grant him that precaution. In fact, they were almost enjoying their trip with him, for the few moments that he would drop the venom in his demeanor towards them. He was funny when he wasn’t vile. 

“Okay. Feste the Asshole time,” Feora interrupted the silence and waved a hand over their face, drawing it serious, “I considered not-”

“Is  _ this _ ,” Jade waved his hand over his face like Feora did, “supposed to tell me something?”

“What? Shut up. This is my serious face,” Feora protested.

“And  _ this _ is my first time seeing it?”

Feora puffed their cheeks. “Mnnngg, no! I was just giving you a warning you pedantic little man!”

Jade raised his hands in mocking surrender, looking far too amused for Feora’s taste. “A warning?”

“Well I  _ considered _ not giving it to you, which I’m considering again, thank you very much,” Feora huffed, crossing their arms. 

“Ah, there it is. I knew you were dragging me out here for an ambush,” Jade lamented, showing his terror at the thought by prodding at the fire with a bored expression.

“You make it so easy,” Feora muttered back. “Look, I’m trying to be transparent here. Talking to Shadow is weird. It’s really personal. Part of me wants to not tell you about it so I can find out what you  _ really _ think of all this.”

“Unlike you, I don’t wear a mask all day,” Jade commented.

Feora laughed rudely. “You’re a liar.” He raised an eyebrow as if asking them to continue, but they shook their head and sighed. “Shadow doesn’t talk in words or pictures or.. What have you. At first, talking to Shadow is like opening your thoughts up to a mind reader.”

Jade’s expression was blank at their words, one of his particular habits that made this choice particularly hard for Feora. They assumed that he never shared his innermost thoughts to anyone and that made them just  _ so _ darn curious. “Fonons can read minds?”

“No more than you’d expect while channelling an arte, but this is different,” Feora said. “This is Shadow point blank, not a few lingering thoughts of it.”

“The difference?”

“Shadow will know what you’re feeling. You will know what Shadow thinks. It’ll be almost instantaneous, and you can’t stop it.”

“Charming.”

“I figured you wouldn’t like it,” Feora shrugged. “What I’m warning you is that I’ll know too, unless you’re prepared.”

Jade paused and looked up at them with a thoughtful frown. “Because you and the first fonon share a ‘pact’?”

Feora nodded, even if his doubt over the whole situation was evident in his voice. “I’m always able to communicate with Shadow. When we’re both talking to it, my thoughts and yours will be connected.”

“Goodness, I didn’t realize we had reached such an  _ intimate _ part of our relationship together, Feste,” Jade cooed, with his little smile that hid everything.

Feora snorted and repeated, “Yeah. Figured you wouldn’t like it. So, I’m letting you know that if you’re prepared, you can keep me out.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” Feora said tersely. “Shadow doesn’t pry, but I’m too curious. It’s a curse.”

“I’d think that’s one that can be dispelled with a little effort,” Jade commented.  
“Thoughts move too fast for that with Shadow. If I remember that I’m curious about you while we’re there, then the second I wonder what you’re thinking something will get sent back to me. From you. If you’re not in control, then it’ll be.. Honest.”

“So you’re saying that one can’t lie to Shadow.”

Feora nodded. “But you can lie to me. Or block me out. Just.. it’s not easy to do without practice, so..” They shrugged. “I can’t really help you other than suggesting you come up with a pretend way to keep me from reading your mind?” 

Jade gave a dry huff of a laugh. “A pretend way? Foolproof.”

Feora narrowed their eyes. “I see what you did there.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

They stuck out their tongue at his nonchalant answer. “I can’t help you any more than telling you to practice now. So good luck and good night, Mr. Pedantic Colonel. I’m giving you first watch as payment.” They shuffled over to their bedroll and promptly covered themself in the blanket. He huffed again, something that was either a scoff or amused, but Feora couldn’t tell without looking at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter gets funky with some formatting play. Doin' weird creative stuff while talking to Shadow.  
> <3


	16. You Will Not See This.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> time to finally meet an aggregate sentience!!!!!!!!!!!! i love shadow its just a.. thing thats like hello i exist. No malice. No vendettas. Just exist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is weirdly written because i didn't know how to describe.. things. Shadow talks in thoughts and knowledge. Like instant Inception. You know that scene in the movie where whats his face is like "i say don't think about elephants, what are you thinking about?" and then explains that you know the thought came from him, not yourself? That's what it is. You know what Shadow wants you to know.

“All the confidence in the world won’t convince me that you know where you’re going,” Jade told them, looking very disinterested in the veil of ivy that Feora had just finished pulling away from a horribly untraveled path.

“My stunning ability to disappear from you at any whim won’t convince you I’m telling the truth, either,” they answered. “It’s been two days. You really think that I’d wait two days to kill you in the middle of the forest? Nobody would have found your body if I’d killed you within four hours of our little trip.”

“That’s remarkably reassuring,” Jade drawled, unmoving.

Feora groaned and stepped over the brush they had pulled aside. “Come _on.._ We’re almost there!”

“You can’t see more than two feet in front of you. How could you possibly know that?”

“This is _Shadow_ , dumbass. Of course it’s gonna be dark,” Feora protested, before giving a gasp and cooing in the way that made Jade cringe before they even said anything. “Do you need to hold my _hand?_ ”

“Aw, I thought you’d _never_ ask,” Jade simpered right back, leading Feora to give him a vicious, cruel grin.

“Jade the Necromancer, scared of the _dark_ ,” Feora teased him, doing their worst and actually reaching out -- like a viper -- to grab his hand.

“Oh, you _mustn’t_ ,” he said with all the inflection of a scandalized noble, “my poor heart couldn’t _take_ it, Feste!”

Feora’s grin only grew worse. “Maybe that’s my master plan, Colonel,” they answered, but raised their hands up. “Come on, it shouldn’t be long now. Stay close to me, if your _poor_ heart can handle that.”

“Only if you promise to be gentle with me,” he answered as he stepped forward, making Feora choke.

“You’re the worst,” they mumbled, unable to keep the smirk off their face as they led the way again. 

Jade was right. It was nearly pitch black this deep in the forest. Feora assumed that it was day time, since they were both awake, but they honestly couldn’t tell. Theor Forest had a way of messing with its wanderers. The next twenty minutes of travel continued in silence, save for the rustling of the leaves beneath them, and Feora’s occasional warning to duck under a branch.

Then, Feora stopped. “This is it,” they said, sounding very relaxed for being in a forest where the only thing they could currently see was the vague silhouette of Jade beside them.

“This? It’s no different from the rest of the darkness.”

“In front of you is Shadow. Let me show you. Give us a light?” They watched his silhouette turn, and then a flare of light come from his hand to illuminate the area around them. Feora held out a hand to their side, which vanished as it reached out. Not even a foot from where they stood, where the light clearly flickered off the trees far behind them -- but there was nothing beside them. 

“Hold out a hand, and Shadow’ll make sure you don’t trip. I’ll see you inside.”

“Inside?”

Feora gave a smug chuckle, and then their own face faded into nothingness. As pitch black as the darkness beside it, it stretched and slithered in the most inhuman ways before slinking into the darkness in a single strand. Jade’s closest encounter to this trick of theirs was their sad puddle of teleportation away from Sync. This was far more disturbing.

Still, he steeled himself, and took the step forward to meet Shadow.

* * *

To Feora, it seemed like Jade entered Shadow protected by the whole might of the Tartarus around him. They had warned him but, for Lorelai’s sake, did he really need to be so damn untrusting?

**He took no chances.**

His emotions stayed walled but for the few things he could sense in their current state. He could feel nothing but his own feet on the ground, and the vague knowledge that he did, in fact, have arms that could move. There was no sound nor sight to come with this.

Well, unlike a certain _someone_ , Feora was willing to share. It was almost like they had been a trustworthy person this _whole_ time and that _someone_ was just being stubborn. They floated around the void across from him, wispy and flickering like a flame.

 **He took no chances.** Where was Shadow?

The response came from everywhere around them. Not from a single source, and clearly not from Feora nor his own mind, but it was as clear as day:

Hello.

Was that a word? It was! Rude! Feora had said there would be no words! They huffed and puffed indignantly, creating a wave of warm amusement from everywhere that was not them.

_It thought using language would be polite._

This knowledge was not shared in words to Jade. It was simply as if… he knew. The thought did not come from his own mind, but was clearly placed there by the sentience around them.

This is Jade. _Feora’s words came laced with quite a few lingering frustrations. As if the word “Jade” already had hidden meaning between themself and Shadow -- a meaning that was very clearly “ugh, Jade.”_ You don’t need to be polite to him. 

Jade couldn’t help the automatic rebuttal that escaped from him. It flew from his mind to the others without his permission, only to be very quickly closed afterwards by his walls.

_How petty._

**He took no chances.**

As if that’s not your default state of being.

_Somehow, the retort felt more giddy about this than the frustration from before._

_Humans fight over such silly things. There are no enemies in truth._

Jade quite agreed. The truth was what they came for, besides.

_A spark of frustration with a hint of vengeance._

Fine.

_The walls came up in an instant._

In that instant, there was blood. The memory of blood, but as potent and strong as though it were there with them.

The stench of it flared through Jade, along with everything else.

 _It was terrifying. Raw and soul-ripping. Horror warped the nothingness around them, if only in feeling._ And then there was Agatha.

_She was real?_

Beautiful, innocent, poised Agatha. _Dread and horror filled the void as Agatha died. Her scream rang pure and sharp in the mind of each of them. The welling of guilt afterwards, how much their heart ached to save her._ But they were stuck, frozen in their place between closet doors. They did nothing as Agatha died. And then, beside their hiding space, there was a man.

**No, not that man.**

The memory shifted, no longer to the hidden closet, but to the outskirts of Grand Chokmah. There was Feora, and there was a man chasing them. **No, not that man.** There was the man, or there was the cursed forest beside the city.

**No... not that man.**

What man?

**No.**

They chose the forest. 

Fear, pain and grief swept over Jade in never-ending waves emanating from Feora.

The forest held only monsters and darkness. Their feet bled from running without shoes. Their body ached from it. _Their heart broke, replaying the screams of their family over and over again._ It was unending. There was no path beneath their feet, no end to the trees. _Despair washed over them as hunger and exhaustion drove them to collapse in the darkness._

_There was nothing but darkness after that. It was all Feora could remember._

_The gentle wave of warmth that came from everywhere felt like a breath of fresh air._

_It wanted to greet you._

Why?

Feora’s memories halted in place like being woken from a dream. The terror within them was replaced with a new kind of anxiety that buzzed around them. They said nothing.

_Simply because. Why does one need a reason to help?_

The only aggregate sentience to form without human intervention would have reached out to someone sooner, would it not?

_It cannot leave this place. It spends its time with humans casting artes, but can do no more, until now._

But why help humans at all?

_It is what we exist for. There is nothing more to the fonons but assisting humans. It just had become more whole than the others._

There were at least thirty questions that came from that one belief, and Jade only grew more curious.

_We are not as we once were. That is all it knew._

What does that mean?

_It doesn’t know._

_It only knows the truth of the present._

_It wanted to greet Feora._

_The gratitude that came from Feora felt like it would burst into tears._ Shadow reached to them and guided them through the darkened forest. It gave them the strength to move again, and the strength to explore. Until their friendship grew, and they could roam the whole forest in what felt like the blink of an eye.

_Smug. That was what came next._

Feora had told the truth. The whole time. How that must hurt for the poor, poor Colonel’s heart.

Their taunt was met with no response.

**He took no chances.**

Then Feora had gone to St. Binah. The Dark Wings.

They lived with Shadow for a long time. And then-- There was a gap, walled off by Feora's own walls. **No, you will not see this.** \-- They went to St. Binah. Their family.

The gap.

**No.**

How very, very disappointing. Jade was under the impression that they were speaking truths here.

 _Rage fizzled and crackled in place around Feora._ They had shared their very heart and soul with him for this. What had he given in return? Why not tell us about your fomicry, _Dr. Balfour._

**He took no chances.**

Feora would hold up their one wall. Fuck you.

They would get his suspicion, then.

Of all the petty-

_Stop. You have gotten truths. You do not like the truths, but they are truths._

Oh, had he made Feora _angry?_

 _The rage cracked, leaking something new. A burning pain, deep in the chest._ _It hurts._

Feora brushed it away with a brusque wave that no one could see. Whatever. They had given him his answers, and they were quite ready to leave and share nothing more.

Peony.

They only want to help him. 

_A bubble of light, sadness, hope.. It hurts._

The Dark Wings.

They love them. With all their heart.

_It hurts._

But are they trustworthy?

Their family would always help them.

_I think. It hurts._

Are you trustworthy?

Yes. _Dammit_ , of course! Would they have stuck with someone like him if they didn’t actually want to help? 

_It hurts._

Fools are supposed to be unpredictable.

Feora definitely rolled their eyes. It couldn’t be seen, but it was clear. Are we done? Cause they were done.

Yes, that will suffice.

_Feora will be strong. You are not alone._

Thank you.

* * *

When Shadow led Jade out of the darkness, Feora was already there. They turned to look at Jade as he stepped out, and then without a word began to walk back the way they had come. They walked in silence the whole way.

It wasn't until in front of a fire that Jade spoke first. "If you keep this up, I do think Peony will accuse me of replacing you with a replica when we return."

"Huh?" Feora's tone was distant, and they shook their head, frowning at him.

"The silence. I thought the only way I would hear nothing from you for that long was if you were dead."

"Hah, you wish," Feora chortled with a snort. "Sorry. I forgot that you're not… I was talking with Shadow."

"Still?"

"Shadow's my best friend, and it's super easy to talk to while here. We like catching up."

"Is that so?" Jade sounded much like he thought there was more to the story.

Feora shrugged at him and shuffled towards the fire. "It's also a hell of a lot easier to talk to Shadow than you."

"I always thought I was quite eloquent."

"You mean exasperating? I think you meant to say that."

"Charming and well-spoken."

"Sarcastic and secretive," Feora rebutted, though smirking at the words. "Hey, what're you going to tell the Council?"

Jade gave them a look. "I don't have to tell anyone but the council themselves that."

"Ughhhhh, we didn’t bond at all? No deeper understanding? Friendship? Trust?" Feora whined and fell back against the forest floor.

Jade almost chuckled. "Until you learn to read minds, you'll never know."

"Ass," Feora eloquently declared him, decisively ending and winning the argument.

A few moments of silence once again as they began to prep food, and then Jade asked, “What happened before St. Binah?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Feora said, their voice unnaturally calm. 

“It clearly does.”

“Not to you.”

“I cannot know if you were hired to work against Malkuth during that time,” Jade countered.

Feora rolled their eyes. “Do we need to go _back?_ ” they asked, voice terse. “You were searching through my reactions. Did you _honestly_ find anything?”

“Such as?”

“‘ _Such as,_ ’ the intent to hurt anyone. If it was there, you would have felt it.”

“Did you not say that things can be hidden?”

Feora sighed. “That’s too intricate. You bring up Peony, and my emotions about him come up -- or I block them entirely. There’s no filtering what you want to say without thinking about it, and the second you think about it, it’s out in the open. So, no, I wasn’t hired at _fourteen_ to specifically ruin your life.”

Jade raised an eyebrow, his expression never changing from that innocent neutral gaze that made Feora want to scream. “My, my, you sound particularly snippy.”

Feora groaned and rubbed their face. They didn’t respond right away, save for a deep breath. “..Fine. I’m annoyed with you. But I’m working through it with Shadow. I’ll prove you wrong someday.”

“Oh?”

“I will,” Feora mumbled, and then a second later, their best grin was plastered to their face. All semblance of rage was replaced with determination. “Someday, I’ll even make you like me!” They pointed to him, grinning like they had already achieved the impossible.

Jade huffed a laugh. “Should I offer my condolences now, or later?”

“Hold onto them, Colonel,” Feora chirped, serving up the food. “I’ll want to rub them in your face later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I HAVE THEORIES*  
> also i love you


	17. In Which Feora Makes a Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okay so jade can't deny that Feora's probably the stupid princess now, but that doesn't mean he has to like them. He goes on a break and Feora is left dealing with a stuffy council.

“Jade _please, please, pleeeeease_ take me with you,” Feora begged, practically on their knees before him. “The Council is going to kill me. They keep buying me these _horrendous_ dresses and I just can’t. I need to do something. I need to go out there. I swear I’m about to run away from it all myself and I’m _begging_ you to let me come with you so I don’t.”

“After all of this, the thing that would get you out of my hair is a couple frills?” Jade questioned, not looking moved by their plight in the slightest.

“It’s more than _a few_ frills!” Feora lamented. “It’s a _mountain_ of frills! It’s Frill City! I haven’t sewn a dress in _years_ and I could make better dresses than those. For cheaper too!”

“Who knew that a poor fashion sense was all that was needed to defeat Feste the Entertainer.”

“Jaaade, please, I’m _withering away_ under the Council,” Feora whined further. “They won’t even let me perform for the townspeople anymore. How can I be an entertainer without entertaining? I can’t! I _can’t,_ Jade!” 

“You want to go on a vital military mission so you can play your guitar?”

“ _Yes!_ ” Feora replied emphatically. 

He gave a dry laugh, and looked _remarkably_ pleased as he said “I think not.”

Feora gave an agonized wail as they threw themself on the floor. "Jaaaaaaaade!"

He only looked happier. With a lofty tone and a light expr4ession he said, "This is what you wanted. Who am I to go against the will of the Council?" 

"You _always_ fight the Council," they protested.

"Almost as if I've _earned_ the opportunity to."

Feora groaned again and pouted at him, but he only turned to leave. "You know I'll be absolutely _devastated_ if you were to give up and return to your band of thieves in the time I'm gone. Beside myself with grief."

"You're _horrible,_ Jade!" Feora called after him pathetically. "Next time I make you join my show you're gonna be a joke right along with me!" It was a truly terrifying threat, Feora thought, but Very Important Colonel Jade didn't seem to care. What a butt.

* * *

A screech that sounded unlike any Feora knew resounded through the garden. Honestly, it made them freeze in their motions, the glass ball they had been practicing with thumping to the grass beside them. They were already hiding, but not for any reason that would warrant _screeching_. Their heart stalled for a moment before the content of the screeching became clear.

“No! Nephry come _baaaaack…!_ ”

Feora didn’t have time to process what on earth that could mean before the answer came barrelling through the trio of bushes behind which they sat. The plump, pink creature squealed in fear as Feora gasped, both of them clearly startled by each other, but Feora recovered before the rappig. 

“Ahaha, _gotcha!_ ” they cried out, grabbing the little rappig and pulling into their lap. It protested its defeat loudly, but settled down quickly when it got pets and snuggles from someone with the same baby-voice as Peony. “Helloooo Nephry! Are you running away again? Giving everyone trouble? _What_ would Peony say?” 

The rappig had no time to respond to Feora, as a moment later their hiding place was disturbed by a very flustered looking General Frings. Feora grinned up at him as he froze and processed the scene before him, and Nephry settled down in their lap stubbornly.

“Rappig duty again?”

“Y-Your highness!” He gave a quick bow, looking only more flustered. “I apologiz-”

“You’re good, you’re good, Frings,” Feora assured him, waving a hand and moving onto a subject of conversation before he tried to figure out too many formalities. “I figured that Jade would’ve taken you with him on his mission. What are you doing here?”

He paused in his stammering and straightened up. “I was given separate assignments here, and I have many reports to go over to tie up the ends of the truce with Kimlasca.” Feora nodded, scritching under Nephry’s chin. The rappig was very pleased by this. “Er.. If I may, your highness, what are _you_ -”

“Doing hiding in the bushes?” Feora smirked at him, assuming they would have to answer that question at some point anyway. But then they let out a huge sigh, one worthy of a performance all on its own. “Hiding from the Council, obviously. But now that you’ve found me, I shall have to search for a whole new spot.”

Frings clearly had at least three questions from that, but he went with: “Hiding from the Council? Did they not determine that you _are_ who you say?”

“Yeah, they did, and now everything’s gotten _awful_ ,” Feora whined, leaning back and pouting. “They won’t let me do a _thing_ to help. All they care about is trying to throw away my Bag of Tricks and buying me dresses.” They crossed their arms and scowled. “And I’m not here for all that. I’m here to help with the _important_ stuff. But Jade wouldn’t take me with him either.”

“You asked the Colonel?”

“Yeah, but he said no, like a butt,” they grumbled, leaving Frings to purposefully not respond to that. Then they narrowed their eyes and raised a brow at Frings. “.. One of your tasks wouldn’t happen to be a _special_ one from him, would it?”

Frings only looked confused. “I.. get most of my assignments from Colonel Curtiss. Are you thinking of something specific, your highness?”

Feora huffed a little and relaxed enough to pet Nephry again. “I thought he might’ve assigned you as my new babysitter while he’s off being important.”

“Ah,” Frings gave a little, embarrassed chuckle, “he may have mentioned it, but His Majesty Peony overrode that decision. Which is why, now…”

“You have a runaway rappig,” Feora finished, grinning. “I knew Jade couldn’t leave it alone. Do you need help with the rappigs?”

“I couldn’t ask that of you, your highness,” Frings said immediately, but Feora waved a hand again.

“I promise you, it’s more important than being forced into another dress and told how to behave like a _lady_. Where are the others?”

Frings rubbed the back of his head. “I… thought that taking them out one at a time would make it easier to handle them.”

Feora chuckled, patting Nephry’s head, and looking down at her. “And you still got away, huh? You’re such a little troublemaker.”

Frings looked curiously at the two of them. “She’s.. Behaving much better with you.”

Feora grinned at him. “One of the members of my troupe a while ago was an animal tamer,” they said. “I picked up a few tricks that could make your life _way_ easier if you help me out.”

Frings paused, and then looked a little wearily at them. “Are you… trying to bribe me into something?”

“Yes!” Feora chirped happily. “If I can help you with the rappigs, can I hide in the military quarters? I swear I won’t get in the way.”

“You.. what?” 

“The council won’t let me go out and perform, and Jade made it _real_ clear that this is a ‘test of good will’ or something so I can’t just slip out for a week, either,” Feora explained, sighing. “But if I’m with you, then he can’t complain!”

“I-I’m not sure I should be complicit in you avoiding your duties.”

“Frings, that’s the _problem_ , I _have_ no duties,” Feora said firmly. “They won’t give me any. Let me go with you, and I’ll walk the rappigs any time you want _and_ go get you.. Coffee or something.”

“Coffee?” Frings asked.

“I’ll be your secretary! Mail all your reports for you so you have more time to work, things like that!”

“That just sounds like more of a bribe,” he said.

“Would you let me do it without the rappig help?” Feora asked, giving him a knowing stare.

He looked flustered. “W-Well.. I really shouldn’t be- That is- Your highness should not have to-”

“Exactly,” Feora interrupted him, raising a finger. “But I want to, so I’m bribing you. Or blackmailing you.”

“Blackmail?” Frings looked warily at them.

Feora grinned. “I could make Nephry run away again..” They rolled around the glass ball in the grass, and the rappig’s ears perked up in interest.

“Oh, please not that,” Frings said quickly, composure completely breaking. “I already spend so much time on this instead of my work..”

“See? It’s a perfect plan!” Feora grinned. “I’ll make sure you have enough time to get all your work done!”

Frings sighed. “I.. guess. As you wish, your highness..”

Feora smiled and pulled themself standing, carrying Nephry with them. “Feste the Entertainer is at your service, General Frings!” They gave a bow that made Nephry squeal in surprise, and then giggled when they stood upright. “Let’s go walk some rappigs!”

* * *

When Feora entered Peony’s room, the rappigs swarmed to them. Almost just like they did when Peony came, and honestly it terrified Frings. Feora knelt down and pet them all, cooing at them in all the ways that made them really look just like the Emperor.

“They.. really like you,” he commented.

“I like them, too!” Feora said happily. They stood and grabbed the leashes and harnesses off of a messy table. Aslan grimaced and prepared for the struggle of getting the rappigs to stay still long enough for that. This process usually took at least 30 minutes. That was the honest reason that he had left with just Nephry today… he needed a break from harnessing the others.

But Feora did not seem to have any trouble. They stepped around the mess and scooped up rappigs one by one, harnessing each one within seconds. Frings could only stare. “How.. did you do that?”

Feora grinned at him. “Pheromones,” they teased. But then they scooped up another babe and turned around. “Rappigs have a weird instinct that not a lot of people know about. If you hold them like this, they completely relax. I think it’s something about how mother rappigs carry their young.”

Frings blinked, staring at Feora’s arms, which held a rappig that now looked like it was going to doze off any second. “I.. see.”

Feora grinned and finished up the task, before taking three of the leashes and looping them around their waist. “And now I can’t lose them,” they said, sounding proud of themself.

“Until they drag you away by force,” Frings pointed out, looking warily at the idea.

“We’ll see,” Feora answered happily. "C'mon Frings! Adventure awaits!"

"...I don't like the sound of that..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its kinda short because I gave up on timelines and now all my writing is going all over the place. I've written post-game stuff. Why.


End file.
